• Neil Gaiman
• William Shakespeare
• Edgar Allen Poe
• Sappho
• Margaret Atwood
• Rebecca Gilman
• J.K. Rowling
• The Brothers Grimm
• Jonathan Larson
• Lewis Carroll
• Jim Carroll
• Edna St Vincent Millay
• Sam Shepard
• Dorothy Parker

• Bananas
• Coffee
• A strong taste of alcohol
• Black licorice
• Canned asparagus
• Curry
• Cheap soy sauce
• Sea urchin sushi
• Bologna
• Ramen
• Barbecue chips
• Miller High Life
• Shroom tea (not that it stops me)
• Cough medicine

• A mirror placed exactly across from a toilet
• Roadkill
• Cigarette butts strewn like mad on the side of the road
• An ex in an unexpected situation
• Tramp stamps (which are different than lower back tattoos)
• My roots when I've gotten too lazy to touch them up
• My midsection when I'm bloated
• Women who dress way too young
• Pictures of anything related to seal clubbing
• Hair on the back of someone sitting in front of ...

• Being cold
• Sore throats
• Holding a bottle of water with a wet label
• Cat claws on me
• Menstrual migraines
• Nausea
• That tingly, needle feeling when blood is flowing back into a limb
• Hangovers
• Chapped lips
• Foot cramps

• Alcohol on someone's breath when I feel even the least bit nauseous
• Anything with curry being cooked
• Hospitals
• Car exhaust
• Chanel perfume
• Stagnant water
• Bread that has gotten moldy after being forgotten in a cabinet
• Litter boxes
• Chain pizza places
• Secret Vanilla Chai deodorant
• Red tide
• Anything baby related

• Hearing the words "mount" or "wiener"
• Music that is nothing but screaming
• Any sound a baby makes
• Fire alarms
• Any of the songs they played incessantly when I worked at Chuck E. Cheese
• Anything by Radiohead
• Anything by The Red Hot Chili Peppers
• People talking during movies
• A bed companion grinding their teeth in my ear
• The sounds dog make when they are in pain
• Chainsaws
• Children's laughter in the night
• Anyone s...

• Disney movies
• Playing pretend
• Playing dress up
• My stuffed dalmatian, Spotty
• Fairy tales
• Dr. Seuss
• Super Nintendo
• Coloring books
• Playgrounds
• Wishbone
• Twister
• Playing with rubber ducks in the tub
• Playing with hamsters in those crazy, plastic balls
• Gummy snacks
• Finding glitter to be one of the most amazing substances imaginable
• Bill Nye the Science Guy
• Play Dough
• Finger paints
• Sidewalk chalk
• The Easter Bunny
• Climbing tr...

• Charlotte dealing with her miscarriage by dressing up as Elizabeth Taylor
• Big and Aiden sitting across from each other, bonding over thier mutual understand that a situation where "she can reach me, but I can ever get her" is fucked up
• The Manholo Blanhik lady being sassy with Carrie's friend who "shoe shamed" her about her kids running abound the store
• Carrie stealing the guy who still lived with hi...

Or at least what passes for autumn in Florida

• Halloween
• The first morning I wake up with the windows open and it's cool
• Green bean casserole at Thanksgiving
• The air feeling so much cleaner
• Going back to school
• Light sweaters and scarves
• Cloves in the morning or late at night
• They just taste better in autumn
• Borrowing cute boy's jackets because "I didn't realize it would be this cold"
• Seeing Annie get all ex...

• Everything smelling like pine and vanilla
• The holiday scavenger hunt my friends and I have had every year since I was a sophomore in high school
• The Victoria Secret Holiday Fashion Show
• New Year's Eve
• Exponentially more stylish clothing
• My birthday
• Champagne is constantly on sale
• Brainstorming great holiday gifts for my loved ones
• Peppermint hot chocolate at Starbucks
• Everyone is way cuddlier with each oth...

• Flowers are coming back
• Being a Floridian, spring comes right when I couldn't stand another week of the cold
• Cadbury Mini Eggs
• Making Ostara baskets
• Manatees at the beach
• All the Pagan holidays that are fun and lusty begin in the spring
• Makeup companies coming out with all sorts of shimmery and pastel colored products
• Spring Break
• Getting drunk on cheap beer and eating hot dogs at baseball games
• Barbecues
• M...

• Breaks from school
• Constant thunderstorms
• Shrooms are in season
• Heat, heat heat
• I'm like an orchid, I thrive in hot and humid climates.
• All the snowbirds are gone
• Beltane and Midsummer
• Women are wearing much less clothing
• Fireworks
• Summer romances
• Strawberries in season
• Back to School clothes shopping
• Summer blockbusters
• Margaritas and seafood on the beach
• The smell of hot pavement that's wet from rain
• Reading b...

• Creativity
• Love of nature and animals
• Great breasts
• Natural dancing ability
• Something that makes gay men simply love me
• Quirky decorating sense
• A love of Marilyn Monroe
• An extremely expressive face
• Skin that freckles rather than tans
• A superhuman ability to hold a grudge
• Fierce loyalty to my friends

• Craving for books and knowledge
• Love of history
• Preference for psychedelic music
• A really quick, hot temper
• A loud voice that just skyrockets on the decibel scale when I'm angry
• A huge affection for marijuana
• When I'm tired, there is no keeping me from falling asleep
• Tallness
• Book smarts
• The delusion that when I'm drunk, I'm witty and articulate
• An interest in darker literature and movies

I know why I want them, but I'm not sure what I want...

• For being a writer
• A pinup girl reading a book
• The words, "Feed Your Head"
• A quill
• A quote from my favorite book, American Gods
• A Shakespearean quote
• For Florida being my home
• A cluster of orange blossoms
• A pirate's chest filled with orange blossoms
• A mermaid with orange blossoms in her hair or over her breasts
• A little lawn flamingo
• A Doors lyric for my...

• Jack Dawson & Rose DeWitt Bukater
• Rob Zombie & Sheri Moon Zombie
• Bonnie Parker & Clyde Barrow
• Jimmy Harper & Mary Lane (Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical)
• Mickey & Mallory Knox (Natural Born Killers)
• Gomez & Morticia Addams
• Audrey & Seymour (Little Shop of Horrors)
• Sid & Nancy
• Cesar & Cleopatra
• Romeo & Juliet
• Carrie Bradshaw & Mr. Big (Sex and the City)
• Harry Goldenblatt & Charlotte York-Goldenblatt (Sex and...

• Swing dance
• Tango
• Ballroom dance
• Fence
• Drive a stick shift
• Surf
• Sail
• Say “I love you” in 20 languages
• Do the “Thriller” dance perfectly
• Roll a joint
• Whistle with my fingers
• Blow a smoke ring
• Blow glass
• Make a daisy chain
• Pick a lock
• Hotwire a car
• Change a tire on my own
• Identify constellations
• Appreciate wine like a true connoisseur
• Budget my money better
• Make gourmet cupcakes
• Score drugs in a public place and...

• Sylar
• Alymer from "Brain Damage"
• Audrey II
• Faith from "Buffy"
• Captain Barbossa
• Michael Corleone
• Posion Ivy
• The Killer Klowns from Outer Space
• Spike and Dru
• Catherine Tremmel
• Harley Quinn
• Ursula from "The Little Mermaid"
• David Bowie as The Goblin King
• The Firefly Family
• Chucky and Tiffany

Random smile causers...

• Anxious, excited first couple minutes of hearing an audience before going on stage for the first time in a play
• Brainstorming outfits for special occasions
• Conversations that stretch on into sunrise
• Dance/hug thing my best friend, Annie and I do when we haven't seen each other for a while
• Eating breakfast with my friends
• Feelings of endless possibilities and unimaginable wonder a...

• The Mushroom Kingdom
• Wonderland
• Fraggle Rock
• Hogsmeade
• Willy Wonka's chocolate factory
• Fern Gully
• Halloween Town
• The Baxter Building
• Sunnydale
• Springfield
• Candyland
• The Land of the Dead from "Corpse Bride"
• Whoville
• The Ten Kingdoms
• Gotham City

• Studio 54
• Woodstock
• The launching of the Titanic
• Jim Morrison's infamous Miami performance where he exposed himself to all of south Florida
• A prophecy by the oracle at Delphi in Ancient Greece
• A 1920's speakeasy
• The Beatles last rooftop performance
• A robbery by Bonnie and Clyde
• Susan B. Anthony voting in the 1872 Presidential Election
• Marilyn Monroe singing "Happy Birthday" to JFK
• The Human Be-In
• The Summer ...