non-canon things in hp fic that make me want to tear my hair out because of how uncanonical they are to the books. this isn't an advice thing just a personal thing because i am a stickler for book canon and also my preferences the plot of cursed child can die

  • clothes. wizards wear: jumpers, nightgowns, and otherwise robes (including overcoats). they do not wear: trousers, skirts, and otherwise muggle clothing. undergarments are questionable.
    • no pockets (harry would tuck his wand up his sleeve)
    • no house tie or scarf - they only have badges
    • harry and presumably other muggle-raised children would probably wear jeans underneath/muggle clothing underneath
  • making non-animagus characters become animagi within a year without governmental training or special circumstances
  • "mione" or worse, "herm"
  • "ronald"
  • while i'm like, not particularly against ron loving food, over-exaggeration of it is mostly movie-canon (& i hate the movies) so i'm pretty particular about that
  • slytherin harry as a swot (STOP THIS)
  • harry ever laughing at the expense of ron, hermione, luna, ginny, or any of his book canonical friends, just because draco malfoy/some other slytherin made a mean joke about them (proof pending)
  • draco & hermione friendship with a suspicious lack of ron. i don't care if they're both smart! draco called hermione slurs all the time and hermione is, frankly, too gryffindorish to forgive him so easily even if he is apologetic and ~intelligent~
  • professor harry
  • i am less against auror harry but generally my maximum favor goes to pro seeker au harry
  • ron/hermione post-canon divorce/breakup/etc without a reconciled happy ending
  • minister of magic hermione
  • mention of hogwarts houses in post-hogwarts fic (as epithets, color descriptors, characters using hogwarts houses as character descriptors) like it's a big deal when they're in school but it's not. really. a big deal outside of school. character relationships and dynamics would affect how characters are grouped off and i think the characters are aware enough of that to not chalk it up to hogwarts houses. when they're not in hogwarts, or IN hogwarts (as adults), it's largely irrelevant and needs no mentioning or for indicative use.
  • unironically using any other magical person/figure other than merlin as a swear/exclamation, especially hogwarts founders
  • buff harry he is scrawny and tall ok. even when he plays quidditch he is lean and muscle that boy is not thick SORRY
  • ~*~*~ potions lover/master draco~*~*~ like just bc he's a slytherin doesn't mean he's a whiz at potions lmao
  • THERE. IS. NO. YULE. BALL. THAT. DOES. NOT. INVOLVE. THE. TRIWIZARD. TOURNAMENT.
    • TRIWIZARD TOURNAMENTS ARE BANNED IN THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE
    • BECAUSE OF DEATH!!!!!
    • DO Y'ALL WANT TO DISRESPECT MY BOY CEDRIC DIGGORY'S MEMORY OR WHATEVER THE FUCK
  • honestly why do y'all do this non-canon ancient magic/pure blood ritual worldbuilding bullshit. like. where does it come from. why do you do this. the simplicity of the magic in hp world is a charming point
  • also, sad squib narratives?? fuck off. don't do that. the narrative basically feels the same as cishet people writing Sad Gay/Trans narratives and it's just woobifying and dehumanizing and nasty. i mean i know it's not the same fucking thing bc squibs are a made up thing in the hp world but the attitude towards which people write about them is the same way cishets write homophobic/transphobic narratives about lgbt ppl. stop.
  • percy weasley with conservative leaning sociopolitical (within the magical world) views. fck off.
  • Slytherins Are Victimized And Actually Did Nothing Wrong = false. not just the slytherin characters individually - and really if you think that all or even a significant amount of the shitty stuff a lot of the slytherin characters did is defensible, you need to reread. it's not to say that they're the worst and everyone else is Good (bc the way fred and george treated montague was awful) but they are like. very Obviously (Magical) Racist and Obviously Bullies you can't excuse that shit or just say that they're narratively victimized. while the depiction and actual writing of the house is very flawed, the actual characters and their actions should also not be excused, "justifiable," or glorified
jan 11 2017 ∞
feb 20 2017 +