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The electricity sizzles from the main stage and tears up the grass silently, creeps towards us and through our veins. We transform into trees and our roots tangle as one and we soar into the sky and play Frisbee with the moon and have our first date in outer space, where earthly matters don’t count, because we’re intergalactic and above it all and who can witness something that happens eight thous...

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listography GIVE A GIFT OF MEMORIES
FAVORITE LISTOGRAPHY MENTIONS
IMPORTANT NOTICES
MESSAGES
PRIVACY
  • "Freud's theory wasn't scientific...and he didn't give a shit."
  • "Don't kiss my ass! My ass has been kissed so much it has psoriasis." - on suck ups
  • "So God takes a shit on the church and destroys it." - summing up Jung's 'forbidden thought' in a nutshell
  • "If you told Skinner he'd be in a theories of personality book, he'd roll over in his grave a hundred times. He'd look like a dynamo spinning round and round in his coffin."
  • "You Asian kids, if you don't become doctors or mathematicians, your parents are lighting candles for the dead."
  • "You think you're bored now? This is pornography compared to the next chapter!" - preparing us for the chapter on Eysenck and Cattell
  • "You just wanna sit there and giggle like the psychotic on the D train." - when one of the students wouldn't tell him why she was laughing
  • ~a student randomly babbles for two minutes
    • "Wait, your question is so long I don't know what you're asking."
  • "I put up a graph and all of a sudden you go into a dissociative state." - on our groaning during Eysenck's statistical theory
  • "The only thing participating in this class is your ass sitting on the seat."
  • "His theory of personality wasn't much...as you can tell because it only took him 5 pages to explain it." - On Carl Rogers
  • ~papers drop on the floor
    • "Eli, that's your biggest contribution to class thus far."
  • Professor: "Everyone uses defense mechanisms."
    • Student: "I don't use defense mechanisms."
    • Professor: "See? That's pure denial right there."
  • "You bought your boots for $140 but you're complaining about buying a textbook? Shut up!"
  • "This is a term paper, not an exercise in stenography."
  • "Why are there more people than syllabi?" - pondered with noticeable disturbance
  • "Who doesn't have the book?"
    • half the class raises their hands
    • "Holy shit."
  • Bitches are like buses. Every ten minutes there will be another one." (oh HELL no!)
  • "You're shaking your head like 'This is so much bullshit I can't believe I'm paying tuition to listen to this.'" - on some guy shaking his head in the back of the room
  • "You fall in love with a musician, you're in deep shit."
  • "At this school you can graduate without ever having a single original thought."
  • "Are you spreading diseases in my classroom? - to the girl who has been sneezing in class since the beginning of the semester
  • "You're entitled to happiness? Don't you think life is going to have a say in whether or not you're happy, you simple-minded ass?"
apr 27 2012 ∞
may 14 2012 +