You've driven up to the wild and windy sea in your Vauxhall Astra

• You don't get out the car
• You don't roll the window down to get some fresh breezy sea salty air
• The wife in the passenger seat is unflasking a cup of Tetley's tea (tea-bags still in)
• Your heads straight down into your puzzle book
• The wife hands you a buttered bap with ham. And some cheesy Wotsits
• The wife sits there slurping tea thro her false teeth.
• Radio is switched on low to Classic FM.
• The odour of a tired fart is expiring lamely on the backseat, inside the backside of your manky fat old dog.
• The wife gets out her sudoku.
• You don't look up or out the window; the wife doesn't look up or out the window.
• No talking is happening. Only the sound of a fruit pastille being sucked.
• Manky fat old dog is looking sadly out the window.
• You aren't going to get out the car.
• Manky fat old dog isn't going for a walk.
• But he couldn't anyway. Arthritic legs.
• An hour passed.
• The sun was shining, the wind blowing, the sea was rolling in.
• Never mind. Time to drive back now. Back to the bungalow.... put the heating on.....