• "HeLLo"
• "i'm your huckleberry"
• a whore is a whore is a whore
• accidents don't just happen accidentally!
• after we kill it we can go to disneyland!
• alright, mmmbop your way out of here
• at least i don't look like a lumberjack
• brilliant. can't wait to see sam in stilettos and a leather bustier really putting the s-a-m into s-&-m.
• cas, get out of my ass!
  • i was never in your- ...
• cas, not for nothin', but the last person who looked at me like that... i got laid
• dean, this is a very serious investigation. we don't have time for any of your blah blah blah blah!
• did you have protection?
  • i had my angel blade
• driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cake hole
• dude, on my car, he showed up naked, covered in bees!
• dude, you fugly
• either you get good fast, or you get dead faster.
• first impressions can be deceiving, moose. for instance, i once thought of you as dull and plodding.
• game of thrones is complicated. shower sex, that's complicated. hell ain't complicated.
• gay love can pierce through the veil of death and save the day.
• god bless kale, am i right?
• he's sarcastic, but he's thoughtful and appreciative too
• his name is 'misha'! 'misha'!?
• hot sauce.
• how important is lipstick to you, dean?
• i told you!
  • oh well, goood for yoouu
• i don't understand that reference
• i found a liquor store.
  • - and?
  • and i drank it.
• i hope your apple pie is freaking worth it!
• i learned that from the pizza man
• i shot the sheriff!
  • but you didn't shoot the deputy!
• i think i'm adorable
• i would like to know what this official business is you're here about.
  • it's officially none of your damn business, ma'am
• i'll interrogate the cat
• i'm a pishtaco.
  • a fish taco?
• i'm a posse magnet. i mean, i love posse
• i'm an angel, you ass
• i'm batman!
• i'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition
• i've... got genital herpes.
• if the pizza man truly loves this babysitter, why does he keep slapping her rear? perhaps she has done something wrong...
• if there is a key, there must also be a lock
• is it just me, or is it getting a little phallic in here?
• it's not food anymore, dean. it's darwinism
• kids today, with their texting and murder
• let me guess, rog... you were fraaamed
• maybe you should try plan D for 'dumbass'
• my ❝people skills❞ are ❝rusty❞. pardon me, but i have spent the last ❝year❞ as a multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent
• no one in the history of torture's been tortured with torture like the torture you'll be tortured with
• oh crap, i'm a painted whore!
• okay, yeah. for dean. / okay. for dean. / for dean. / i barely know the man!
• pudding!
• sam winchester cries his way through sex
• sorry, you have me confused with the other angel. you know, the one in the dirty trenchcoat who's in love with you
• the hand that giveth can so quickly taketh away.
  • yes, we getteth it.
• these tacos taste funny to you?
• they burned down my house! they ate my tailor!
• they think the ball washer did it. [the what?] the ball washer. [the what?] the ball- ... !
• this is what you boys do? sit around watching pornos with angels?
  • we're not supposed to talk about it.
• this isn't funny dean, the voice says i'm almost out of minutes
• this isn't wall street, this is hell! we have a little something called integrity.
• today you're my little bitch
• we'll star trek 4 this bitch
• well, what is she, exactly?
  • - the whore.
  • wow, cas, tell us what you really think
• were you ever nice?
  • 1985. worst year of my life.
• what did she say to you?
  • something along the lines of ccchhhhhhhh!!!
• what kind of house doesn't have salt? low sodium freaks
• when humans want something really really bad... we lie.
  • -why?
  • because... that's how you become president.
• why is 6 afraid of 7? i assume it's because 7 is a prime number, and prime numbers can be intimidating
• will you... boy? how?
• yesterday was tuesday, right? but today is tuesday too!
• you don't know what it's like to be human!
• you exploded jofiel.
  • or did jofiel explode himself? just sayin'.
• you know what they say: he who hesitates, disintegrates

bonus! (bloopers)

• *gasps* that is not nice!
• confetti, it's a parade!
• i need you cas, you're my baby daddy.
• jared's not saying his lines right!
• just give me a slow death... wait, that's not what i want!
• yes, you like that, i can tell. just relaaax.