- Craving fresh oranges all of a sudden. I never used to be very fond of oranges but at the moment I think they're delicious and so refreshing.
- Riding my bike through the woods, trying not to get stuck in the mud. The first mushrooms. Yellow goldenrod and magenta-coloured impatiens everywhere.
- I've been Christina's fangirl since her Lifejournal days. For some reason everything she likes and does is cool.
- Re-reading The Secret History and loving every minute of it. I've done some research on the Dark Academia aesthetic and already ordered a few new books to satisfy my craving for the vibe. Donna Tartt's descriptive language and references are truly fantastic. I would love to be able to write like that myself, preferably using more than one language (as in Umberto Eco's The Prague Cemetery, I suppose?), referencing to the most interesting works of art and describing any place in a way it feels oddly familiar to people.
- The dreams are back. However, there's one thing I've noticed: the more happy I am and the more I've got going on in my life the less I seem to be able to remember my dreams.
- Pre-ordering books. Forgetting about it. Always a pleasant surprise.
- The weird energy-bursts I have when my diet consists mainly of fruit and vegetables (some dark chocolate, too).
- The indulgent feeling of cracking open a chocolate marshmallow with your tongue.
- Postcards from R. Pistachio souvenirs.
- A good Saturday: Spending time with the kitten brothers. I named the grey one Moby. Then we walked to Nymphenburg and played on a seesaw, had delicious pistachio ice-cream and talked about the kind of classes I could teach next year.
- R. is forcing/offering me to give workshops at the adult education centre because he thinks it would be good for me (I've got a chronic issue of not being challenged enough, I suppose). He even wants me to write applications to publishing houses because I know that I'm not entirely happy with my job. The other night he forced me to book a flight. Any flight. Because he knew that it would be good for me. He just sat there waiting for me to make up my mind, even when I sat there crying because I didn't know what I wanted and wasn't able to make a decision. Despite the discomfort this all creates I appreciate being held accountable and having someone nudging me to start doing the hard things I often put off indefinitely. Oh and he is able to stand my crazy streak, offers advice, conviced me to finally have surgery. He's a good one. I even wrote a letter to him on the plane to Funchal, trying to express my gratitude.
- Brainstorming career ideas for me. I kinda wanna be an activist, explorer, producer or journalist/writer.
- Watching movies in bed. With snacks. Reading in the morning with R. asleep, embracing me.
- Finding exactly the shoes I wanted second hand. In the right size, cheaper than online and in mint condition, too. They were sold out everywhere!
- Afghan food! We had dinner at an Afghan restaurant one evening and the next day Sadia incidentally published this video about the kind of food she ate growing up in an Afghan family. She's one of my favourite YouTubers - incredibly talented, with impeccable taste and always radiating positivity.
- Gratitude and appreciation for the good things in my life. I'm a classic Negative Nancy so it's quite noticeable whenever I'm able to outgrow this part of my personality.
- How cute R. looks with his hair in a bun, wearing my camel parka.
- Truffle pesto.
- Main character vibes. Travelling alone. Operating way out of my (current) comfort zone: Surviving the long-ish flight. Twice. (Flying stresses me out - it isn't even flying per se but the whole procedure; getting there, standing in line, waiting, TOO MANY PEOPLE, not knowing who I sit next to, everything is too confined and uncomfortable). Renting a scooter and going straight to the highway without any hesitation or practise. Going scuba diving for the first time since 2019 even though I wasn't planning on doing that. Meeting new people. Doing new things. The funny thing is that I actually love adventures - experiencing new things makes me feel alive - but I've taken a long break from doing anything, really. I've been depressed, feeling bad about myself - it's nice to see that I still have it in me and that my curiosity is still there; I've just got to practise a little and muster up enough courage and motivation to get into action mode again.
- I ended up going to Madeira without really thinking about it (I'd just heard that it's a nice place) and it was SO beautiful. Cable cars, flowers everywhere, 180° ocean view. I saw whales and dolphins, got a tan, ate fresh fruit every day. Madeirans are crazy about passion fruit and I tried my best to taste all the different maracujà products (the queijo with passion fruit seeds was my favourite, I think). I met Higino who works as a spotter for whale watching boats; we had a lovely evening observing the sea and the sky, talking about nature, culture, animals and so much more. I saw gorgeous places on a jeep tour to the west of the island with a group of Dutchies. There was a spooky forest in the mountains, breathtaking views and I especially liked the natural volcanic swimming pools. I developed a sixth sense for lovely vegetarian restaurants (and even got my own tiny balcony at Olive's). There were cats. And banana trees. Crabs. I drank Poncha and spent too much money at Parfois. I had a really good time.
- Oh and I found a used copy of The Girl on the Train in the kitchenette and spent the whole week reading it, ignoring the book I had brought along. I finished it on the plane on my way back. Very entertaining!
- Checking out Raphael's new office. Stealing pencils. Drawing on his notepad. Checking out all the secret drawers.
- Reuniting with my students after the holidays! It's surprisingly nice to see them all again. I also got to know a few new pupils (and I'm working on making the Spanish girl help me with my homework).
- A video call with Clarence the cat.
- My Tumblr revival. I'm thinking about going back to blogging again. When I was thinking of posting a photo on Insta (after a long hiatus) something held me back. Perhaps Instagram just isn't the right platform for me?
- Getting along really well with Doris. She often drops me off at the subway station after work and so we spend a few minutes in the car together and I'm always sad when I have to get out because there's still so much left do discuss. Even though Doris doesn't wanna be friends with colleagues I secretely think we are besties.
- Japanese food heaven with Margit. Calpis, black sesame ice-cream, Tonkotsu ramen and Tempura on rice. Even though I had to wait in line for one hour to get a table.
- Making pumpkin/spinach lasagna with Manu. Talking the whole evening.
- I also called Frank after not talking to each other for two months and we spoke for almost two hours. I appreciate having people in my life who just work for me. It's amazing when a friendship is effortless, you don't have to pretend or omit anything. And you can just pick up the conversation where you left off - even two months later.
- Julie Delpy's series On the Verge / the new season of Sex Education - especially the scene in the second episode when the students performed Peaches' Fuck the Pain Away.
- Forehead kisses / a cute photo for reference. I've been trying to get R. to make it a habit.
- Adopting stray books at the tram stop (this time about a illiterate girl growing up in a book shop - and there was a cat on the cover as well; no-brainer).
- A huge dragonfly on my balcony.
- Getting things done. Stuff I had put off for weeks. Organising. Crossing off things from my to-do-list. I even did my effin taxes.
- Watching chestnuts drop down from the trees like little grenades. Going out to collect some. Fall, quite literally, has arrived.
- Sundays with Lena. Cake, vampires on TV, a walk around the lake, catching up, veggies for dinner.
- Miezi Cuts - finally a name for a hair salon I don't hate.
- Cleaning out my cellar (again). Finally getting rid of the old mattress and loads of miscellaneous items.
- Our trip to LA: Mexican dinner at Cantina, ice-cream, talking all the time and getting along really well / when Raphael met my mum and got astro-analysed immediately / flea market in the sunshine; I found a lovely knife, an artsy mug and a book about mushrooms / the little crucifix I got for free (the perfect prop for jokes) / I got attacked by a nandu / goat-watching / walking down to the castle / lunch at Gstaudach, harrassing a kitty or two / more treasures at Hab&Gut / a walk in the forest with my mum - sadly we didn't find any mushrooms but she had some at home from earlier this year so we could eat creamy mushrooms and dumplings for dinner / playing badminton, boule and Quirkle together / the big grocery haul right before closing time
- Sleeping in on Sunday. Vivid dreams. Spending two hours in the kitchen making banana bread, crisp bread, banana curry rice and a potato stew with leeks and mushrooms. Sunshine. Getting more stuff done. Good mood.
- When I sat next to Raphael while he played the piano in my brother's room. He started playing Bach's well-tempered clavier - the first time I heard him play a proper piece. I also loved the self-composed one from the vampire play at his theatre.
- The people who keep planting these pretty flowers along the footpath on my way to work.
- Fun at the trampoline park with my class.
- The last season of POSE: Angel and Papi's wedding got me all emotional. And My Love is Your Love was the perfect song choice for the series finale.
sep 6 2021 ∞
oct 16 2021 +