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⸻⠀ goals
- ▢⠀change my documents
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀get a reservist certificate
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀get a new voter card
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀get a new employment record card
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀request new bank cards
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀schools/institutions diplomas
- ✓⠀clean & adjust pc specs
- ▢⠀improve my summarizing skills
- ▢⠀deliver my thesis/monograph
- ▢⠀present my thesis/monograph
- ▢⠀graduate
- ✗⠀enroll in a masters
- ▢⠀work part-time during the 2nd semester of 2026
- ✓⠀register for ᴇɴᴇᴍ
- ✓⠀pay for the registry
- ▢⠀participate in the exam
- ▢⠀(hopefully) enrol in a new uni course
- ▢⠀change my calligraphy
- ▢⠀find an okay website to post art
- ✓⠀organize the 06. list
- ✓⠀finish reading a book
- ⠀⠀⤷ and then there were none by agatha christie
- ▢⠀read a shakespeare play
- ▢⠀draw monthly (4/12)
- ▢⠀play bass weekly (0/52)
- ▢⠀walk well every day
- ▢⠀exercise every day
- ✓⠀do more stretching & movement based exercises
- ✓⠀gain weight healthily
- ✓⠀wear sunscreen most days
- ✓⠀take care of my skin
- ✓⠀stop biting my nails
- ▢⠀strengthen my voice
- ✓⠀stop talking like a clown just coz i wanna be 'funny'
- ▢⠀“i'm in my knight era”
- ✓⠀take better (more efficient) care of the house
- ▢⠀write some fiction
- ✓⠀listen to songs that aren't club music
- ▢⠀rewatch the guardians of ga'hoole
- ▢⠀improve myself considerably
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⸻⠀ wishlist
- tech
- ✗⠀ram (maybe)
- ✗⠀ssd (maybe)
- clothes & fashion
- home decor
- ✗⠀exercise bar — i'll use the gym
- ✓⠀computer desk
⠀
⸻⠀ prospects
- 01 ⠀ slow, but steady. ⠀￫⠀ ok, i did well.
- 02 ⠀ keep it steady. ⠀￫⠀ i swayed a little.
- 03 ⠀ apply pressure. ⠀￫⠀ yeah, let's go.
- 04 ⠀ i want it now. ⠀￫⠀ i didn't get it.
- 05 ⠀ give it to me. ⠀￫⠀ it backfired badly, huh.
- 06 ⠀ i need a miracle. ⠀￫⠀ nah, rawdog it.
- 07 ⠀ refresh & recharge.
- 08 ⠀ let's parentify ourselves. ⠀￫⠀ .
⠀
⸻⠀ monthly log
- 01 ⠀➭⠀ here we go. auntie & her sprained ankle. this guy & i carried a washing machine downstairs & it was so humiliating bc i'm weak as hell, i wanna work out again. reading ♥ but feeling behind anyway. left my computer at a technician for a MONTH ffs. my gf visited me & we took a whole week off to visit the city's museums, art galleries, parks, etc. we took a horse riding class together that was super fun! (i wanna enroll in it so bad lol—it's my childhood dream bro). phainoncore. grandma & her (twice) broken leg. asking for significant change & getting it & feeling grateful for it (aka workouts & real responsibilities). planning my future fr bc now that i'll graduate i can be whatever i want & go wherever i want. "you gotta shut up & listen more bro."
- 02 ⠀➭⠀ miscommunication is the century's plague. i'm really digging this snowy aesthetic ngl. everybody is graduating :') i'm so proud of my classmates, they're so cool... saw a vision from the future, but i have to change to make it real. heartopia & rdo. rich ppl are insane (derogatory/curious/scary). frustration sobs. riding classes yay!!! (& realizing all the muscles in my body wow). dear god, i'll be 26 this year, i feel so behind in life lmfao. the 2025/2 uni semester is finally overrrrrr aaaaaaa. grandma & her weird displays of neediness (nothing against her neediness & all against how she does it aka sp2 issues). accompanying auntie for her surgery during my birthday lmao (i slept in a hospital for the first time & the food was amazing). i'm not giving up anymore, i'm done giving up on myself.
- 03 ⠀➭⠀ oh to be self-sufficient. "do NOT ask me to inject you w/ medicine," i say as i'm about to inject her w/ medicine. auntie is recovering well yay. dad's curse is to be neurodivergent, mom's curse is to be full-time complainers even when things are FINE. who the hell gets the worst case of flu during summer? (i also fainted in the bathroom again -10/10). discovering more very odd fears of mine. ah my highschool songs. not the prophetic dreams again... going out w/ friends of friends & it really is different when your group is mostly lgbtq (i'm not socially incompetent, the other gang is just cishet lol). macos-ing my stuff bc i love the aesthetics but not as much as i love open source. slowly going back to my roots (#pas). it's finally autumn. watching ʀᴇ w/ my gf & now it's a comfort series (also, baby). "you're a natural," i knoooow.
- 04 ⠀➭⠀ a fucking ants nest in my KEYBOARD ffs. reminiscing the time when i was insane paranoid & tried to build my own wi-fi. i need to do something challenging or i'll go insane. a single (1) week w/o going to the barn & i feel like i'm dying. drawing is literally my safe point bc it's the only thing i know i'm better at than most ppl & nobody can tell me i do it bad/wrong. nobody is going to pity you (resolute). restarting my life at the old age of 26 bc i'm not my father & i refuse to quit life. i'm kinda tired of being mistaken as a teen when i'm almost 30 bro. *spends 1h asking questions to the deck* "have u been answering me honestly?" *takes out coffin, snake, fox* ffs. self-parenting is the best feeling in the world. learning css & apanhando do css. [x]. a água, a água está batendo na minha bunda meu amigo.
- 05 ⠀➭⠀ just found out the secret of my success. i'm exhausted, bro. "how badly do you want it?" & "i guess, i'm afraid." mediating an eng-pt conversation between an usa immigrant & my riding teacher lol. if i canter i will fly away bro (nvm i'm amazing, bless my refusal to lose), i did got my first scrapped shin tho. everything is bad. i'm being weak & a moron & i hate myself. bro, why tf is may so hellish this year, jesus christ (tbh, keep it like that, it polishes my ego). i can't complain abt being overworked when i love to be & look overworked & to show off how overworked i am (look, i'm doing so many things! i'm juggling so many things & i'm not half-assing any of them!). freud needs to put me in a test tube & jung has to dissect me open. reminiscing my baby punk-rock era & wHY DID I LET IT DIE. istg if i end up being a so4 i'll kms.
- 06 ⠀➭⠀ aaaaargh i can't do it, i'm a looooser, okay? i'm trash, i can't do it. i try to, i swear i try to, but i fail every single time and i'm tired of pretending self-soothing & positive self-talk will save me. i look at it and i freeze and idk how to move. i'm scared all the time, i'm a coward, i'm disappointing, and idk how to fix this! my new neighbour doesn't know she can use earphones to listen to music. that manga was, literally, scarily, very specific uhh i also wrote a 10+ page essay about it too... (i will publish it someday ig). decoding & learning love communication w/ my girlfriend. "you can't be anyone else besides you". locking in? that post that goes something-something "sometimes you take adhd meds and you realize you're just stupid". do not eat apples b4 taking meds. p4 horrendous remaster & p6 scooby-doo trailer. "i think you can do it."
- 07 ⠀➭⠀ catching up w/ a high-school friend very dear to me. too many grief mementos. not the goddamn christians trying to make me trust in their silly written words again (c'mon isn't liking god enough?? i like god, i don't need to be saved or sm shit). *nod, nod*. this time, let's die on the shore. kate's graduation!! i'm so proud of her 🥹. an abysmal depressive episode, but i was surprisingly active? anyway i just tried really hard not to hurt myself this month & i was able to, thankfully. winter break. i'll miss riding past the harbour so fucking much it breaks my heart. john winchester's hospital monologue making me nauseous coz of course it does (tell me you were your parent's emotional support network before they were yours).
⠀
⸻⠀ media
- 🎧⠀ playlist
- 🎮⠀ games & gameplays
- ⠀ 0126 | life is strange 2 (2018)
- ⠀ 0317 | resident evil requiem (2026)
- ⠀ 0323 | resident evil hd remaster (2002)
- ⠀ 0405 | resident evil zero remaster (2015)
- ⠀ 0426 | the lightkeeper (2025)
- ⠀ 0601 | silent hill 2 remake (2024)
- ⠀ 0720 | silent hill f (2025)
- 📺⠀ tv shows & documentaries
- ⠀ 0120 | all her fault (2025)
- ⠀ 0316 | a knight of the seven kingdoms (2026) ⬩ S01
- ⠀ 0425 | radioactive emergency (2026)
- ⠀ 0730 | supernatural (2005) ⬩ S01
- ⠀ 0805 | supernatural (2006) ⬩ S02
- 💻⠀ youtube
- ⠀ 0207 | how to actually get smarter (again) (2026)
- ⠀ 0207 | why hellfire is the best disney villain song ever (2026)
- ⠀ 0331 | sabrina carpenter’s glamorous world of hetero-pessimism (2026)
- ⠀ 0511 | when horror mocks your humanity (2026)
- ⠀ 0511 | why does everyone think "1984" agrees with them? (2026)
- ⠀ 0511 | mouthwashing and men who hate women (2026)
- 🎬⠀ movies
- ⠀ 0106 | frozen (2013)⠀↺ 3rd
- ⠀ 0106 | frozen II (2019)⠀↺ 2nd
- ⠀ 0115 | nimona (2023)
- ⠀ 0314 | wake up dead man (2025)
- 📼⠀ animations
- ⠀ 0101 | sasaki to miyano (2022)
- ⠀ 0317 | kuragehime (2010)
- ⠀ 0330 | tamon-kun ima docchi!? (2026)
- ⠀ 0511 | another (2012)
- 📚⠀ literature
- 📔⠀ comics
- ⠀ 0519 | subaru to suu-san (natsuko takahashi)
dec 3 2025 ∞
aug 12 2026 +
aug 12 2026 +