- what i'd look like with 0% greek in me & was just pure, light featured australian
- whether i'd rather lose an arm or a leg (hint: a leg)
- "waelcome to my kitchen, we have bananis & avocadi"
- what balloons used to look like when i'd release them into the sky as a child
- how excited i am to have adult sons???
- how much i want to cut my hair short
- how i should have a hammer in my room to smash the window if by some chance i wake up to the house on fire. i think about this a lot. someone get me a hammer
- how it doesn't really matter what your social status is in high school because when you're adults, you're all adults & the nerds mix in with the cool kids & life turns out ok. i was not a nerd. i was not a cool kid. amir was a nerd, jake was a cool kid
- how ok i am with dying. like, i'm really okay with it & it's semi alarming how much i've accepted it. i just keep on thinking about how the cause of death might be painful but it'll only last a short while & then i get peace & rest & it's gonna be so great. that moment where my body shuts down is something to look forward to. i sound really morbid but let me clear this up: i don't want to die. i want to live more than anything else in this world. i want to love & have babies & do shit & die an old, shrivelled up woman but if death comes early, it'll be okay. i'll welcome it with open arms, i think
- how weird it is that my mom lived 36 years without me & my dad lived 50 years & my sister lived 15. i wasn't a thought in their mind. they had no idea i was going to exist. i mean, 50 years?? he was on his goddamn deathbed before i arrived. isn't that bizarre?? he lived an entire life without me. it's a little fucked up if you ask me but then again, i've lived 20 years & counting without my future kids & i don't know who they are but trust in me when i say they are a thought in my mind. maybe not their particular faces or personalities but their souls, maybe. who knows, man. i just remembered that i was in my primary schools office in my dream last night & i'm rambling. a fun fact for the road
sep 10 2015 ∞
jan 25 2017 +
jan 25 2017 +