Aww come on, you know you love him!

• Two-timing Tartar Twisters!
• Dictatorial duck-billed diplodocus!
• Ectoplasmic By-product!
• Miserable blundering barbequed blister!
• Pithecanthropic pickpocket
• Ten thousand thundering typhoons!
• Slubberdegullions!
• Fancy-dress Fatima!
• Bath-tub Admiral!
• Odd-toed ungulate!
• Interplanetary goat!
• Billions of Blue Blistering Barnacles!
• Addle-pated lumps of anthracite!
• Cushion footed quadrupeds!
• Duck-billed platypus!
• Nitwitted nine-pins!
• Vivisectionists!

• strikingly skinny
• feminine hands
• ...or voice
• rude and really enjoying it
• excessive bling
• no hobbies
• no opinions
• fear of showering and toothbrushes
• anger-management issues
• smoking
• polygamy

• Elsa Beskow: Aunt Green, Aunt Brown and Aunt Lavender
• Roald Dahl
  • The Witches
  • Matilda
• Thorbjörn Egner: When the Robbers Came to Cardamom Town
• Wil Huygen and Rien Poortvliet
  • Gnomes
  • Secrets of the Gnomes
• Eva Ibbotson
  • Dial-a-Ghost
  • Which Witch
• Janosch: The Schnuddelbuddel books
• Astrid Lindgren
  • Emil of Lönneberga
  • Ronia, the Robber's Daughter

+ means I've seen them more than once

• Amoral
• Amorphis w/ Pasi Koskinen (+)
• Amorphis w/ Tomi Joutsen (+)
• Anaal Nathrakh
• Anathema
• Apocalyptica
• Apulanta (90's)
• At The Hollow
• Babylon Whores
• Black Uhuru
• Bolt Thrower
• Catamenia
• Children of Bodom (+)
• Corvus Corax
• Cradle Of Filth
• Danzig
• David Bowie
• Deine Lakaien
• Diablo
• Dimmu Borgir (+)

I do have some good habits, you know?

• rising early
• walking everywhere
• stretching daily (hate it, though)
• being frank (but politely)
• remembering birthdays

• slouching
• cracking my joints/knuckles
• not returning calls immediately
• ... or texts. Or e-mails.
• worrying about things beforehand
• being sometimes a bit emotionally tone deaf
• procrastination - I'll get back to you tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow, ok?
• holding grudges

August (5)

• Paul Tremblay: Horror Movie
• Taichi Yamada: Strangers
• Marcus Kliewer: We Used to Live Here
• Christopher Golden: Dead Ringers
• Christina Henry: The Ghost Tree

July (9)

• Deborah Harkness: Time's Convert
• Ethan Chatagnier: Singer Distance
• Laura Niemi: Työelämän tyhjänpuhujat
• John Marrs: The Family Experiment
• Nick Medina: Indian Burial Ground
• John Marrs: The Passengers
• Carissa Orlando: The September House
• Django Wexler: How to Become the Dark Lord and Die Trying
• John Marrs: The Marriage Act

June (8)

• Nick Medina: Sisters of the Lost Nation

• Belgium
• China
• Czech Republic
• England
• Germany
• Norway
• Sweden
• The Netherlands
• USA (CA, NY, UT)

• line dancing
• cowboy poker
• giving birth
• scar tattoos
• ... in fact, any tattoos
• chasing a married man
• sleeping around
• joining a religious cult
• wearing furs
• any tricks the Dudesons might find funny (being a human dartboard, for one).
• watching Caspar Noé's Irréversible's eight minute rape scene in full
• hitchhiking (remember Rutger Hauer?)
• drunk driving
• drugs
• five finger discount
• having a pet spider/snake
• politics (it's all smoke and mirros, any which way you look at it. That, and money.)

• drama kings and queens
• queueing
• being interrupted
• bad instructions
• plot spoilers
• badly timed humour
• (pompous) know-it-alls
• people who cut in line
• humming, if its out of tune
• self-appointed saints threatening others with hell, horns and sulphur stench! (Or with public stoning or terrorist attacks!)
• jerks who talk constantly during movies. Shut up! Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!
• standing in the way of folks wishing to use an escalator, moving sidewalk or doorway.
• posh cursing. If you have to cuss, then do it properly and get over with it.

• brain diseases
• ending up homeless
• wars
• losing a limb
• drunken people
• drowning
• large-scale epidemics
• physical/sexual violence
• becoming paralyzed
• governments gone wrong
• losing my eyesight
• certain medical procedures
• Linda Blair in The Exorcist
• Vespula vulgaris , also known as the common wasp