honestly i think you get too caught up in the bigger picture of it all that you stopped viewing the situation for what it is. you get so invested in the bigger narrative behind everything that the actual circumstances are ignored when from my own perspective they really aren't that deep. i get it, i really do. it's never just one thing for me either, it's always some larger pattern or some other thing, but i'm starting to see why people feel so agitated with me sometimes. it's really difficult to breath easy around someone who will lecture you about how your behavior is actually just reflective of a bigger narrative you have no control over. it's exhausting and begins to feel like an excuse at a certain point. you hurt me. you did various things you knew would hurt my feelings on purpose and the only explanation you had at the end was to point in the direction of a bigger, wider picture where your actions were actually justified and fair or whatever. ugh.