James P

• "Dated" me for three months, during the summer between 9th grade and 10th
• Played the tenor sax in band
• Asked me to the Spring Fling, although we had to be forced by friends to dance together
• Had a jungle-themed bedroom
• Was at least an inch shorter than me
• Once made me a ham sandwich that literally contained nothing but bread and one piece of shaved ham
• Had smelly feet
• Ignored me on the first day of 10th grade, then called that night to ask if we could just be friends. We haven't spoken since.

Jordan

• "Dated" me for six months during 11th grade
• Was a camp friend who lived at least an hour and a half away
• Had the coolest house I've ever seen (It's fucking BUILT INTO A HILL! How cool is that?!)
• Was at least an inch shorter than me
• Was about 20 months my junior
• Attended my junior homecoming and didn't speak or dance, but gave me my first kiss
• Cried when I dumped him
• Agreed to be my "friend-boy" date for senior prom (where he danced but still did not speak)
• De-friended me on Facebook early in his freshman year of college. We haven't spoken since.

Sean

• Dated me for four weeks during 12th grade
• Was my bad-boy co-worker at Tim Hortons
• Was my first tall boyfriend at 6'2"
• Played a lot of guitar hero
• Lived in the shit-hole apartments on Tonawanda Creek with his crack-head mother and crazy sister
• Was an 18-year-old high school sophomore
• Was, looking back, definitely on a lot of drugs
• Is still really hard to explain to friends (and to myself)
• Asked me to break up with him so that his friends would stop picking on him for dating me but wouldn't think he was an asshole for dumping me. We haven't spoken since.

James W

• Has been my boyfriend for more than two years
• Is neither short nor on drugs
• Is crazy smart and studying to be an electrical engineer
• Never fails to make me laugh, even when I'm ready to kill someone
• Is sensitive, kind, and genuine
• Makes me wonder how I managed to pick the perfect guy after "dating" three losers
• Is my best friend and soul-mate! <3