• March 5th, 2020, 10:23 P.M. [to Chris Duff]:

True silence is no feeling and no thought and no-thing. It's imperceptible. The silence you speak of is relative to no thoughts, just. So in essence, self-destructive behavior ultimately has no 'consequence', because there's no-thing lying behind it to bring it to fruition. Though, pain occurs, because these patterns of behavior of thinking–do not allow health easily, since it is not constantly concerned for the damages taking place, of the heart–one must take care of the physical construct to optimize all sensory input and output. The heart is buried, but not gone, just less seen under the efforts to truth discovery.

• 9:44 P.M.:

You inspire me to be a martyr. I am in-disposable, yet so much is taken, nothing is truly lost. The identity is just a badge of honor–like a snapshot of a face in the mirror–frozen in a monolithic time-capsule, ebbing and flowing, forever and ever. No one will see, no one will know, because no one cares. I am just what I am–invisible, insolid–tranquil, asleep, but pain carries on. Do not think I am weak, because of low-esteem. I am strong, because I outlast, and look in the simulacrum of,–. Draw me a picture–I'd like to see what you could come up with–I bet it would be captivating.

• 9:05 P.M. [to Belle Namaste]:

You cannot necessarily be free to be unfeeling, just the same as I cannot necessarily be free, to not think. IT just is, with no explanation, that is a veil over nothingness–an emptiness–of all things. It doesn't matter. I act, because I care, and I don't have to–just the same–as you can just be, without care. I love too, but it isn't a pleasant love. It is just as a non-requirement for things to be pleasant as it is for them to be unpleasant. To not perceive, is truly incomprehensible, both to the mind and the heart

• 8:55 P.M.:

I act from my heart. It is just much more unconditioned to pleasure and joy. Fear is not to be feared. Pain is pain. It is not always necessary to flee, only will and judgment, do that.

• 8:52 P.M.:

If you want to be a follower, fine. I don't. I do, however, want to increase awareness that he is not all knowing–because–I care about truth beyond interpretations of blind intuition.

• 8:49 P.M. [to Chris Duff]:

It doesn't have to all be about me. Why not just deal with the subjects I present, instead of this disembodied person, you imagine? You don't know me. Only I do. It's a flux, imperceptible, to the non-perceptible.

• 8:39 P.M.:

Your lack of sense of "I" leads you to proclaim without reason, and condemn those you don't understand. That's your insecurity–lack–of self-awareness, that leads to commanding others to a lack of self-awareness.

• 8:36 P.M.:

I don't take your word for it. That's not evasion. Your word is susceptible to human error. Logic can flatten out all errors.

• 8:35 P.M. [to Belle Namaste]:

The song is what it is. There is no need for change. Only want and judgment leads to escape from pain.

• 8:34 P.M. [to Chris Duff]:

I thought you didn't believe in separateness? It's not my creation, either. Logic is a rigid process. Sure, there is some human error, but the process is unflawed. Your "silence" is relative to not thinking. Feeling remains. Feelings are not anywhere close to "silent". It's non-reliable for discovering truth, therefore.

• 8:28 P.M.:

Try some self-honesty. Admit, you don't know it all. You are wrong sometimes. You are not omnipresent, same as me, same as everyone else.

• 8:20 P.M.:

You claimed I was going after you with some of these posts in a different comment–indeed, that's partially what it has become–because you denied my original statement and went after 'me escaping the messages'. You're doing the same thing to me right now. Do you see that?

• 8:11 P.M.:

You want to be healthy. You want to be sane. Stay full enough, for long enough, you will want something else. The only way to avoid non-appreciation in [of doing what you don't want] in what you're doing, is to make yourself sorry for abandoning it [of doing what you don't want]–through judgment–and rebuke. The want is non-negotiable. It will be there. It doesn't matter how long you deny yourself. You want what you want. Your appetite can change, but the want remains. The only way to completely obliterate all of it is death. So no matter what you do–no matter how much approval you get–you'll still want what you want regardless of what yourself or people say in rebuttal. Whether you do it is another story–that requires–not to listen to compelling force. Listening to compelling force, 'peer pressure' and rejection, will inevitably create resentment and aggression.

• 7:53 P.M.:

Why would you care if it's insanity? Love is unrelenting, like the force for anything else, can be. Only a judgment, would push one in any direction, irregardless of all others. Truth is that thing–and if I die–so be it. If I want not to die–because my values have changed–so be it.

• 7:50 P.M.:

I have a different objective, not to 'present-awareness', but of truth and logic. Illusion is not truth, but it is still an awareness, of unnecessarily, unknown delusion. I sacrifice my health, so I can think, and do what I do–not for security–but love. And yes, it makes me insecure. I don't deny that.

• 7:44 P.M.:

I don't need to believe in my mind. It's a feeling. I don't need to believe in the feeling. I only know, the process ['real' or 'not real'], works, for discovering truth. So why should I give it up?

• 7:42 P.M.:

All that training, a beast or a god, makes of one? What fun I shall have–knowing–not knowing; only love, for an unsane, unreputable desire for truth, and those that care, equally in understanding, thereto. You guys talk like–I'm not here, a ghost, visage–or perhaps, you're unaware of my awareness of your unawareness.

• 7:36 P.M.:

I am hurting. I do hurt. It hurts. I just want to see the truth. I am not seeking approval, otherwise, I would just find people who already agree. That is not my mission. And I understand it is based on my individual value complex–which is a social construct of understanding–and caring. I don't believe truth is mutually exclusive to just being, thinking, doing, and even, dying.

• 7:31 P.M. [to Rebecca Degraaf]:

There is no logic in anything. It's a mechanical, clairvoyance method for seeing beyond immediate present awareness. It requires no belief in the process. It works. To take for granted of only what's infront of you, is to be unaware of the fact that there is nothingness behind it.

• 7:30 P.M. [to Chris Duff]:

I just don't agree with your philosophy. I know the methods work. That's my point–the truth–isn't necessarily in the discovery process. When I want to be present, I will be present. I shall not act out of the fight or flight mode, trying to gain approval, because I am afraid of fear and pain. I will do it the hard way. All the way. Into oblivion. That's thorough learning. Thank you for responding.

• 7:02 P.M.:

Consciousness does not change, in terms of the fundamental mechanics. I can demonstrate: You cannot want what you have no appetite for. You cannot appreciate what you have not been without. The fight or flight mode activates to perceived threats, when in passive, aggressive reactions, and can cause psychological deflections, blocking out, avoidance, assertiveness

, etc. You go from greater pain to less pain, there is no choice in it, if it is a viable option–you will–do it. I can infer lots just from observation, and deduction. It works. Intuition works too, but it's just less reliable. The logical process requires no faith–only–we don't have enough information to fill out a full picture, always, for every circumstance, event, and conundrum.

• 6:53 P.M.:

You're walling yourself off. You give only what you see. Question it, and it will no longer make sense–that's because–there is no reason in anything. Relationships end–because–there is no viable route for communication. We are not connecting. We do not understand. I see 'you', though, all the cogs and gears, twisting and turning–just as I do–in myself. Fair-well.

• 6:46 P.M.:

More glibness. Deflection. Of course, you can't see it, because you aren't questioning. You aren't questioning, so you can't use thoughts to point towards it. I think there is power in vulnerability, to not flinch in fear and dread, to just take it–a kind of–hidden energy, but your eyes do not see.

• 6:42 P.M.:

I see you use those words, like "belief" and how it is delusional to 'present-awareness', but you won't even acknowledge that you're still doing it–it's just become unseen–since thoughts are no longer pointing towards it, your intuition takes over command, in a subversive way.

• 6:38 P.M.:

You're convinced–that's–all that it is. That's your bias and prejudice, unwilling to remit, and see with new eyes.

• 6:36 P.M.:

It's not about you. The self is an illusion. Your words are a representation of belief–yes–not from thinking, but psychological instinct. They represent everything you have ever experienced, thought, and felt–they are 'you'–behind the veil of your subconscious personality construct. It is all just a facade, preaching, and seemingly unrelenting. I understand, in a bizarre fashion–like with my voices–they are unrelenting.

• 6:28 P.M.:

They are not mutually exclusive for discovering truth. That has been my point all along–main point–that they are methods, not the truth itself.

• 6:27 P.M.:

Your posts assume perception is not delusion. That is your intuition philsophizing.

• 6:25 P.M.:

You're calling them fabrications–but–you still philosophize with your intuition, using words. Presence is non-explainable. Your words attempt to point, albeit, grasp the direction.

• 6:21 P.M.:

So you won't answer. You also have a very glib attitude about my behavior, non-chalant. I guess that's a psychological, deflection method. I guess the questions aren't important to you. You're enjoying presence too much. I guess I'll leave you to it. I won't pretend to have an interest, in what you suggest, not that I ever won't–though–not now.

• 6:18 P.M.:

You have a very centrist view. It's your perspective–all else–irrelevant. Can you explain that? Do you think yours is the only one or do you just not like other people's gaze or even my own? Am I wrong on that? Is it a bias or prejudice of yours? Why do you choose to do what you do? Do you even know why? These are the questions. I don't know if you will answer them, with self-awareness, but I can at least put them on your door and ask.

• 6:07 P.M.:

I can't stop you from–being–a human brick wall. You live in your own world. You refuse to see other perspectives. You deny me my words.

• 6:03 P.M.:

The answers aren't always right. The questions aren't always to the point, either. One must learn to think for themselves–logically–just be, do, or die. There are no other ways. And anything else of 'imperative' is a judgment–proclamation–based assumption of the intuition and mal-formed, loosely associated, mind-eye. Just a preference, nought, more.

• 5:45 P.M.:

Separateness is not a necessary determining factor for calculating rules of engagement and relationships–this–cannot be reasonably denied.

• March 4th, 2020, 6:09 A.M.:

'An insane reality requires an equally insane response, that is to face it. Therefore, to leave reality, is sane.'

There is no reason to choose either one, only want for one, or the other. The want is non-negotiable. Anything else is by compelling force–outside of individual values–so then, to become a servant to another's vision. There is no reason to value one perspective over another. All is devoid of sanity–but we shall do so, anyways, because that's just life. To be sure, there is a sense of purpose, and that is true–a sense–cannot be denied, just ignored, deflected, blocked out, avoided, through passive, aggressive tendencies.

I cannot avoid my madness. I am constantly aware of it. I see what I see. I feel what I feel. I do what I do. And I acknowledge, that's all it is. Fear of fear, fear of thinking, fear of presence, fear of noise–fear–all there, just moved around, to different avenues of the sensory optics, retranslated and interpreted via new modes and nodes, unseen, then seen, like intuition and logic; all of them, optics, of biological navigation and motivation.

There is no other way–nowhere–else to go: Pain is pain. 'We are designed to be motivated and not satisfied.' We are designed to push until the last breath. That's the way. Death.

• Comment Threads Referred to:

https://www.facebook.com/chris.duff.98284/posts/2586188338323185?comment_id=2586201838321835&reply_comment_id=2586243831650969

https://www.facebook.com/chris.duff.98284/posts/2586039111671441