• January 16: It's amazing how much things change in one year. This time last year I was bemoaning the loss of a relationship that meant a lot to me (but really sucked). I was just learning what it means that God loves me. And how powerful sin really is. Now, I just got back from a mission trip. I went forward at church yesterday to announce publicly a call to missions on my life. I'm so excited to see what God has for me next year. So that's the end of this list.
• January 10: Today has been awful. I'm not even gonna play like it's been a good day. I got to go pearl shopping, but that was legit the only good thing that happened today. Granted, that is a really cool good thing, but it still really sucks, ya know?
• January 9: Today I fell in love with a people group.
• January 8: I am in South Asia! It's really... interesting. I miss my friends. I am excited to see Chels in Jackson. I am excited to see Tara and Caitey in Sullivan. I am excited to see Glenae and Megan at school. So... yeah.
• December 14: Well, I guess I am officially going to South Asia. I went to the doctor today and, even though I still don't feel well, she didn't tell me not to go. So I guess I'm going. It seems silly for me to ALWAYS not want to go places. I always love it once I go... I am trying to remind myself of that now.
• December 13: I spent most of today wondering: Why did I agree to go to a foreign country for Christmas? What was I THINKING?!
• December 12: One of the things I like best about being home is watching all the TV shows that I used to watch with Dad all the time. I mean, the shows are really dumb, but it reminds me of my childhood and high school years. Whatever else they were, those years were much simpler.
• December 11: An otherwise uneventful day was made exciting by getting to hang out with my bestie best best best, Caitey, and Josh. It was, as always, really good to see them.
• December 10: Break is already really, really boring. I've been studying (that's right), looking at summer missions opportunities, and watching TV. I am SO ready to have a life again.
• December 9: Absolutely nothing exciting has happened to me today.
• December 8: I am so excited to get home. This week is going to be filled with relaxation, rest, studying (got to get ahead in physics!) and DIY projects from Pinterest. There are several that I can't wait to get to, including:
  • Nook Case: You make a case for your Nook by gutting an old book and gluing in elastic to hold the Nook in place. I will def be doing this before South Asia.
  • Picture-Frame-to-Dry-Erase-Board: You get an eight space picture frame ($10 at walmart) and put scrapbook paper in each frame. Then you label it for the days of the week and you have a weekly dry erase board calendar!
  • Car Trash Bag: OMG THE DREIDAL NEEDS IT SO, SO BAD!!!
  • Lanterns: You can make cool hanging lantern thingies by dipping the yarn in watered down glue, wrapping it around the balloon, and popping it after the yarn dries.
• December 7: Tonight Glenae, Megan, Chelsea, and I all decorated Chelsea's apartment for Christmas. While I watched my three friends struggle with the Christmas tree, I really got to thinking about how much we've all changed over this past semester. It seemed like every single day at least one person was upset with at least one other person. I'm not gonna lie, it's been exhausting. There have been a lot of snags along the way, but we've come so far. I couldn't help thinking how the four of us seem to have become a real family somewhere along the way.
• December 6: I should be studying. What am I doing instead? Writing protest emails to the people at PayPal. Why? Because I read this article (http://www.regretsy.com/2011/12/05/cats-1-kids-0/) and I don't liiiike them. Basically, they're telling someone that they can't help children on Christmas. Cute, right?
• December 5: Today is the anniversary of the end of the worst relationship ever. I'm really not that upset, though. I have way too much to do to be haunted by memories of poor decisions.
• December 4: Once again, finals have snuck up on me. I can't believe that in just a few short days I will be home. This semester has been interesting to say that least... Hopefully next semester will be less interesting, more productive?
• December 3: Today I went to research presentations. I expected it to be boring, but it was actually really fun. It made me start looking forward to my research and presentations. I can't wait to figure out what I'm going to research.
• December 2: I'm thankful for good friends.
• December 1: I don't really have anything to say. My mono is flaring up really bad and I haven't felt too good this week. The semester is almost over. That's it.
• November 30: I'm realizing more and more how much dates and anniversaries matter to me. What's weird is, I don't remember birthdays very well, but I can tell you the date that I went to Madison this summer. I can tell you the date that Chad and I got together and the date that we broke up. I can tell you when my Preview Day was at Union and the date of my father's heart attack. And every time one of those dates rolls around, I find myself drawn to the past. I remember the events in detail. I remember exactly what it felt like, smelled like, looked like. I remember little details like that it took me forever to find an acceptable pair of shoes the morning we took dad to the hospital. But I don't completely hate my memory, because it also makes me remember what I learned in those times. For example, remembering the date of my first Preview Day reminds me that God provides and that His plan is truly good for those who love Him. As December approaches, there are several anniversaries coming up for me. I pray that they draw me closer to Jesus, not closer to the darkness that those memories hold for me.
• November 29: Today I am going to share my stance on homosexuality. Hate it, love it, agree, disagree... I don't really care. But this is what I think. I think that homosexuality is a sin, just like any other sin. I don't think it's any worse than lying or stealing or cheating or premarital sex. I think that everyone is predisposed to certain sins, such as addiction and, yes, homosexuality. It may be a very difficult sin to deal with, but I do believe that it is a choice because the Bible says that it is. I think that some Christians need to stop making it out to be worse than it is and others need to stop ignoring where the Word says that it's wrong. And as a whole we need to remember that we all sin. Everyone has things that make them fall every time. Just because they are less obvious doesn't mean they are better. That means that we have no right to hate homosexual people and also no right to idolize them. People are people, and they should be treated as such. We can be loving and Christ-centered without condoning the action. Geez, I'm friends with people that sin (actually, everyone I know does) and I manage to not hate them for it. I think I can succeed with people who struggle with homosexuality as well. There. That's my (what I believe to be absolutely correct) opinion.
• November 28: I relish it when my ex is more awkward around me than I am around him.
• November 27: I wonder what will happen when I finish this. I'm getting close, you know. Just a little under two months and it will have been a year.
• November 26: I probably shouldn't have torched bridges that I may want to cross again.
• November 25: I'm debating using my birthday money (well, some of it) to get a new study bible. I like the idea, but would it really be more beneficial than just reading the one I have. Not sure, but I'm spending today looking for one. Also, is it cheating to make all my friends the same thing for Christmas, if that thing is really cool and I know that they'd really like it?
• November 24: Happy Thanksgiving! I went to my watchcare family's house and ate too much food! This Thanksgiving was more, to me, about thinking about all the starving children that don't get a feast like that, ever. I can't wait until I have a real job and can sustain sponsoring a kid. There's so much I want to do in the world, and I just can't.
• November 21: It's finally Thanksgiving Break. It doesn't really feel like it at all. My head knows that I don't have to go to class tomorrow and I can study and such, but it really just feels like school work will never, ever end. Of course, that could have something to do with the research I'm doing on internships and grad school...
• November 16: In three days I will be 21. That's too weird. Normally people celebrate that date for getting completely drunk. Not me. I'm going to Build a Bear (hopefully) with all my bff's. But turning 21 makes me think about how different my life COULD be if I wanted it to be.
• November 15, pt. 2: OH MY GOSH IT'S ONLY FOUR DAYS UNTIL MY BIRTHDAY. I just want to state for the record: Whatever I am doing this year will be infinitely better than whatever I was doing last year. I am so grateful for the friends that God has put in my life.
• November 15: Well, it must be that time of year. First Chereka gets really sick. Then I get sick. Now Tara is have asthma attacks and going to the ER. It seems like these things come in multiples around here. Usually they come in three's so maybe we're good for awhile. Either way, Tara, I am praying for you and for your family. It does sound like satan is trying to get y'all down, which usually means that God is doing something. I know that you'll be okay as long as you keep seeking Him. LOVE YOU! (And... yeah, you may want to tell your dad to tithe... ;P )
• November 14: It's Monday. Guess what. I have mono. So South Asia is looking like it could be out of the picture. This is surely a lesson in the sufficiency and wisdom of God. He knew I was going to get mono before I ever signed up to go to South Asia. If it's meant to be, it will be.
• November 11: Well, I am laying on my couch in Sullivan, IN. This is because I am dying from an unknown illness. I am not happy about this, but there isn't anything to be done. I HAVE to be better by Monday.
• November 10: I have been sick since Monday. I mean, like the same sick that sent my roommate to the hospital. So my mom wants my brother to come get me and take me home, but I don't want to go home. So it's all very up in the air and upsetting.
• November 6: Today I attempted a road trip with Jesus. Not gonna lie, I wasn't the most successful that I've ever been, but it was pretty cool. And the drive went a lot faster than normal, so that was good too.
• November 5: I watched my high school's play tonight. I ended up in the sound booth on the headset. It was so surreal to be back in that theater, on that headset, like I was every single day of my senior year. You know, back before my whole life got kind of turned upside down. Back when I loved theater for theater, without the politics. Back when it was about having fun creating something together, not about who was better than who and before it became all about putting each other down. I miss theater being like that, even if it was amateur. I would rather be a happy amateur than a stressed out professional. It's not worth it.
• November 4: Only two classes and a six hour drive stand between me and home. I honestly can't wait to get there.
• November 3: My roommate is in the hospital. They have no idea what's wrong with her, but she was dehydrated when she went in, and whenever she stands up her blood pressure drops dangerously low and then she passes out. So that's exciting.
• November 2: I'm convinced that this one day had to be, like, five days long. First, I only got two hours of sleep because I had to take Chelsea to Memphis at 5 am to catch a bus. Then I had to run errands for Aubrey (related to David's dad's funeral) and run errands for Chereka, my very sick roommate. Then I had a test. Then I had to go to the visitation (running into some unpleasant faces on the way). When we finally got back to campus, we realized that Chereka is, like, deathly ill so we took her to her cousin (who is an ORAL surgeon) and then he took her home. Then I had to stay up until two studying for an inverts test. So all in all, longest day ever.
• November 1: In 18 days I will be 21. I don't like that.
• October 30: Today I learned that I HATE PONYO WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING.
• October 29: Did you know that the tops of jellyfish can sting you? That just ruined Finding Nemo for you a little bit didn't it?
• October 28, pt. 2: I may have a job! I'll keep you posted :)
• October 28: Today is the anniversary of the worst decision of my life. I think that this day will always be a reminder to me of two things: The horrible, ugly, destructive power of sin, and the beauty of God's saving grace. Today I am focusing on the sobering idea that sin isn't something to wink at; it has serious consequences. It has been an entire year and I am still dealing with the consequences of that stupid decision to deliberately disobey God. But by the same token, He still came after me. He didn't let me stay in a place of complete rebellion. Even though the discipline of God is heavy and hard to handle, I would much rather have it then stay where I was. Today in chapel we summed it up perfectly by singing "Nothing but the Blood." That song really reminded me that my sin is disgusting, but His blood has washed me white as snow. He took care of it, so today can be spent in celebration for what He is doing, rather than mourning for what I have done! AAAH, that is seriously the best feeling ever.
• October 27: I filled up an entire notebook journal thing! To be exact, it's my letters to Jesus notebook. I've never filled out an entire notebook before. It's really fulfilling and exciting!
• October 26: I just found out that I can go to Career U! I'm really hoping to get an intership with either Youth Villages or Carl Perkins Center. I am really nervous, but I know that, whatever happens, God is in control.
• October 25: Not having internet in my room is really frustrating. I guess it's decreasing my internet time, but it is also really ruining my life.
• October 24: ATTENTION TARA: I think I am coming home the weekend of November 5.
• October 23: I've noticed that most of my updates are whining about my tests. That's because my tests are evil monsters that are trying to eat me in the night.
• October 19: Ah. It's that time of month again; the time of month where I have a test in every single one of my classes. Woo.
• October 18: Today I found lots of resources to help with my new passion: working with abused kids. I'm praying about what opportunity I should pursue, but it is all really exciting. It's awesome to look at something as ugly as child abuse and feel like I can somehow make a difference, even if it's only in the life of one or two kids. That's one or two kids that may have ended up a lot worse without me. It's nice to be reminded that I can make a difference, even with the mistakes I've made.
• October 17: Today I found out that Kid's Best is having a lock-in for the 4th-6th grade class. Let's suffice it to say that I am trying to work out a way to be there.
• October 16: I went to a pumpkin patch and corn maze today. That's very fall break-y.
• October 15: Aaarrr... My body knows what I did. So much pain. So, so much pain. It was worth it, but I am so sore now. At least I get to just lay in bed and write today. That's a nice feeling. I wish I had a pretentious writer's sweater, glasses, and a cup of some strong tea. But I can't move off of this bed to get any of that soooo...
• October 14: I went on a roadtrip to St. Louis with Megan, Megan, and Chelsea today. We went to the arch and the zoo and City Museum... And it was so, so much fun. After these really stressful couple of weeks, this trip was exactly what I needed. So much fun.
• October 13: I am sitting in my room listening to a conversation about genetically engineered food. All I can think about is John Green's novella about the zombie apocolypse starting with genetically modified corn. I also recently saw Contagion, so I'm generally paranoid about stuff. I do think that a crazy disease taking over the world is a possibility. I'm not sure that I buy the whole "antibiotics creating a super bug" thing, though. If we didn't have antibiotics we'd still be dying of minor illnesses. So I guess it's two and one half dozen of another.
• October 12: I just submitted my physics assignment, which means that I am OFFICIALLY on Fall Break. I have to teach in the commons tonight and such, but from today until Monday I AM ON BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my goodness, I needed this break so badly. I am so, like bouncy and jittery.
• October 11: Come on Fall Break.
• October 10: It's almost Fall Break. It's almost Fall Break. It's almost Fall Break.
• October 7: I want to curl into a little tiny ball and sleep for days. This has been the longest week. Of my entire life. Fo' real.
• October 6: I am so hungry that I am literally counting down the minutes until I get to have dinner. Thirteen--no, twelve--to go.
• October 5: I chose not to sleep again. Man, I am DUMB.
• October 4: Today was long because I keep choosing not to sleep.
• October 3: The fact that I NEED A JOB is weighing heavily on me. My job from last year went kaput and my prospects for this semester are grim. My top job choices are: a day care, Petsmart, Books A Million, and Starbucks.
• October 2: Church was really exciting today. Unrelatedly, I really want to find a way to be involved in helping abused kids.
• October 1: It's October and you know what that means: My monthly Chick-Fil-A coupons are in effect again!
• September 30: It's family weekend, which means that campus is flooded with parents, siblings, and families. It means that we have a movie on the lawn and that we pretend that campus is always wholesome. There's an air of excitement and pretentiousness around the UU. Um... I don't mean anything by that, I just mean that I like it, I guess.
• September 29: I AM SO TIRED OF STUDYING! I have had FIVE tests in the last week, two of which have been very, very hard science tests. And I have another test today. And I am sitting in the dumbest, most exhausting class in my schedule, and it's 9 am, and IT IS FREEZING IN THIS ROOM. I am not a happy camper about this.
• September 28: Spent the evening at a physics review session. I can't say that I understand physics any better than I did before, but at least Dr. Poore brought us cookies.
• September 27: I know more about the anatomy of invertebrates than I ever cared to know. The sad thing is I think I'll still bomb this test.
• September 26: Rented Anastasia and Bartok the Magnificent. Talk about your good days.
• September 23: Chelsea signed her lease today! And she got another call about a job! Woooooooooo!
• September 22: I took two tests today. I think I did alright on both of them, but I am not going to be doing the all-nighter thing anymore.
• September 21: Bad news: I had to pull an all-nighter. Good news: Cake, Chelsea, Glenae, and moooooovies!
• September 20: It is 6 am and I am in White Hall. I wish that I liked getting up early more because you can get a lot more done this way. Plus, no one else is up this early so it feels like you and Jesus are the only ones in the whole wide world.
• September 19: It's a good thing I like my study carrel so much. I'm going to be seeing a whole lot of it this week.
• September 18: Longest day ever. I didn't get on the road until 3 because my older brother was reallllly late for lunch. But it was fun. Seeing him was pretty much worth it.
• September 17: I like being home. It's nice to have someone to feed you and buy you things and always think you're the smartest.
• September 16: Scientists seriously need to quit letting their personal feelings get in the way of evidence. We aren't even looking at it unbiasedly anymore... We're just fighting to fight at this point.
• September 15: Today has been THE longest day ever. I had to stop THREE times during my six hour drive back home, which is unheard of for me. And I am really tired. But, tomorrow I'm going to the Corn Festival with my bestie for the first time in three years, so I suppose that makes it worth it in the end.
• September 14: Ba dum dum... This week has been boring and tiring...
• September 13: I hate the way malls smell.
• September 12: I live with an RA. Today we had Progressive Snacking, so we had 1000 freshmens in our dorm. They were rude and loud and kind of dumb. Freshman are so weird...
• September 11: I am officially going home for the Corn Festival!!!!!
• September 10: Watched The Help. It was such a good movie!!!
• September 9: Today was a good, good day: Chelsea came back, made up with Glenae, hung out at rehearsal, and didn't even have a single panic attack. Sha-bam.
• September 8: Now I am also allergic to pink lemonade. Taking a benydrill and going to sleep.
• September 7: First day with my 7th graders. Rob and I were told that we would only have about two, but when we got there, we had 12 little bundles of joy boppin' around! They were are all soooo great! We hit the jackpot this year!
• September 6: So... I want to write a novel. Really bad. The thing is I don't have any good ideas for a novel. I'm itching to write, though. I am also seriously considering writing a science text book. Or children's curriculum based on the book of Romans. But neither of those things are good replacements for what I want to write which is A NOVEL.
• September 5: Funny quote of the day: "Dreams don't come true for the stupid!"
• September 4: Today has been an awesome day! Megan joined FBC Humboldt AND my watchcare family adopted her. We all went out to lunch together and had a truly excellent time :D Plus, tonight is the first mission trip meeting! I am really pumped to get to know the team and see what exactly I will be doing. PLUS my google chrome background is pikachu. Yes. A good day.
• September 3: My room is really coming together here. I LOVE it. This semester it's a space that really expresses who I am and what I love. Let's be real: There are three Albert Einstein decorations in here. Also, it's covered in pictures of people I love, a giant curtain my kids made for me, objects from people I love, and a prayer wall that *hopefully* will help me be a better pray-er this semester.
• September 2: I got up early to take Chelsea to Memphis to catch a bus home to Wisconsin. She's coming back on Friday; she just needed a chance to say bye to everyone. It is insane to me how God moved to get her down here, and I know that it's insane to everyone else too. That's okay; sometimes the things God does in our lives are insane.
• September 1: Today I found that the screen on my laptop cracked. How, I do not know. I do know that it is frustrating to be on laptop number three. It's ridiculous.
• August 31: Things I find comforting: Digimon, the Bible, Christian music, quiet alone time in my dorm, working out.
• August 30: Today my professor asked what osmosis was. A girl raised her hand and said, "Um... Isn't that like a movie or something?" These are real life college people. Really. Real life.
• August 29: I played with play do in my Anatomy lab today. At first I thought, "This is super awesome!" which turned out to be a lie because he gave me a massive worksheet that was REALLY hard right after that. But I prefer worksheets to dissections sooo... at least there's that. Also... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BESTIE BEST BEST TAAAAAAARRRRRRRAAAAAAAA!!!! Congrats on surviving for two whole decades!!!
• August 28: Today the sermon was about Jesus being our Lord. The guy preaching asked three questions: 1) If Jesus is Lord, why are you still wearing the crown? 2) If Jesus is Lord, why are you still on the throne? and 3) If Jesus is Lord, why on earth do you have so many arguments with Him? The last one struck me the most. Looking back at my whole life, it seems like all I ever do is argue with Jesus. I wonder how much more I would get done and how much better I would be if I didn't spend every waking moment arguing with Him. I think I am going to spend this week praying about the Lordship of Jesus and what that should mean to me. I don't want to argue away all of the things He wants to do with me.
• August 27: Looking for apartments with Chelsea.
• August 26: Looking for apartments with Chelsea.
• August 25: I fell asleep during every single one of my classes today. I'm going to bed early because it is too early in the semester to be doing this. I am very disappointed in me.
• August 24: First day back at FBC Humboldt. I love that church so so so much.
• August 22: I just found out that I am working with the 7th grade girls at my church this year! It is really cool because I wanted a way to plug in there and I was JUST thinking about how I would like to work with 7th graders. I didn't think it would happen because all his openings were filled last year. THEN THE YOUTH MINISTER CALLED ME AND TOLD ME THAT HE NEEDED A GIRL TO WORK WITH 7TH GRADE. That, kids, is Jesus being really cool.
• August 21: Got down to Jackson today. Started moving into my room. The walls and doors are all the same color so it looks like a mental asylum. I hope that my year isn't going to feel like I live in a mental asylum. Surely not.
• August 20: Helped my bestie move into her first apartment today. Headin back to Union tomorrow with another bestie in tow. These times... They're a changin'.
• August 9: I'm home from Wisconsin! I feel so out of the loop in Sullivan. Like, I just read Tara's listography and I realized how much I have been gone for. At the same time, I feel really out of the loop in Madison because my other two roommates are still there, texting me all kinds of updates on what's going on. And yet again, I feel out of the loop with Union stuff because I've been gone for awhile and, let's get real, everything will be different there this year. I'm terrified but trying to be excited, and I'm trying to tell myself that I won't be caught in this limbo forever. I'll belong somewhere again. I just hope it's soon.
• July 28: Today we went to Circus World in Baraboo. It was a ton of fun. One of my boys got in a hula hoop contest and almost won. I fell in love with a clown named Roger. Good times, good times.
• July 25: Today has been terrible. But I'm holding out hope for tomorrow to be better. Cause if it's not I'm going to straight punch a baby.
• July 24: Dear Diary, Last night I got stuck in a sand pit. Today I had an allergic reaction to a strawberry and my roommates are suffering from food poisoning. Except K, who is enjoying it. Still planning world domination. Love, Lesley
• July 23: Apparently I say really ridiculous things while I'm concussed. Example: "I trapped a in giggle inside my heart."
• July 20: Lesson Learned: Don't talk to irritating people before breakfast. It makes you less rational than normal and you may jut commit a murder.
• July 19: Today I found out that I'm allergic to mangoes by eating one. Throat swelling is a good time.
• July 18: Kid's Best is going to be the death of me. At least I will like the way I die.
• July 11: I decided to stay up until 1 and then get up at 7 and work with children all day. Fail. Fail on so many levels.
• July 10: Today I was sitting on my bed in the basement, when a paper airplane hit me. It was a note from Chelsea and Megan. This became a huge joke where we send messages up and down the stairs for each other.
• July 9: I had a terrific day off. I just wanted to do nothing so... I did.
• July 8: My summer missionary roommates insisted upon watching digimon with me. They think it's really funny and now it has become a tradition. Hmm... Who knew that my opinion would be, like, valid?
• July 7: I fulfilled one of my life goals: I tie-dyed a shirt! It's pretty cool. Unfortunately, I also helped around 70 kids tie-dye shirts, so now my whole body is also dyed. At least it's a pretty kind of messy...
• July 6: Today I didn't have to do any lesson plans. It was absolutely glorious.
• July 5: I have to stop getting concussions. My head hasn't quit hurting for three days. It's 8:00 and I'm going to bed.
• July 4: Confession: I really enjoy watching Digimon. I'm tired of being ashamed of the things that I enjoy, however dumb they may be. Judge away, world. This is who I am.
• July 3: The summer missionary team decided to complete a 750 piece puzzle featuring a picture of Time Square on it. We decided it must be done today. Eight hours later it is sitting on our table almost finished. It would be finished if we hadn't somehow managed to lose ONE PIECE. How does that happen to real life grown up people?
• July 2: Today has been an exciting day of doing very little. Got some stuff done for Kid's Best, but I haven't been all that productive. Maybe it's because my head hurts and I'm nauseous.
• July 1: Okay, I'm going to try to update every day again. My computer got stolen so that made it more difficult. Today I got a concussion so that was fun. Um... That's all I got right now.
• June 15: Wow, I really suck at this while I'm at Kid's Best. Sorry, world! Well, I've pretty much fallen in love with my class. There are no behavior problems really, they're geniuses, and I adore them. The only thing is they're getting to that age where half of them are in love with each other. It's obnoxious, but they're too cute to hate on.
• June 10: I am really enjoying my summer here. It has been so freaking stressful though. Really, how hard is it to make a concrete schedule so that we don't all look stupid when the kids get here?
• June 9: Today I made a girl cry. This person was 20 years old and is a teacher at Kid's Best. It was an accident.
• June 8: Tonight was meet the teacher night. It was really awesome! I am going to love my class. Now if I can just live through teacher training...
• June 7: Sorry for the gap. I have been getting settled into my routine in Wisconsin. Kid's Best is as hectic as ever. I'm very excited to be here, however. My team is awesome; we've already quite bonded. We have NO boys so there's no need for catiness, distractions, or cuteness. That also means there's noone to lift heavy objects, but you can't have it both ways. All in all, I feel like this team is God-chosen and I'm thrilled to be here.
• June 4: The next time I update this I'll be in Wisconsin. I'm leaving tomorrow after church. I don't really want to go, because I never really want to go anywhere. But I know that God has really awesome things to do this summer. Excitedly nervous.
• June 3: Today I went shopping with my mom. It was pretty fun. Gettin' ready to head to Wisconsin, which is always a fantastic adventure.
• June 2: Today I got my purity/promise/engagement ring! It's so pretty. It has two little tiny cute diamonds and they're beautiful. Here's a blog post about my ring: http://hurtladies.weebly.com/1/post/2011/06/engaged.html
• June 1: It feels like June outside. Which is great, because it is now June. Sorry. This is a really lame thought of the day.
• May 31: Today I realized that a really annoying guy at Union has taught me a lot inadvertently. He has no idea that he has helped me see the world from the point of view of those that don't agree with my convictions and has helped me understand how other people view things. He probably never will know because he mostly taught me this through his own stupidity and it would be insulting for me to tell him. It's really amazing to me to think that I have learned so much from this guy. Interesting how life works and who God uses in our lives.
• May 30: I made a website for Kid's Best. It's www.kidsbestdaycamp.weebly.com Check it out to follow my adventures!
• May 29: In a week I'll be in Madison, WI working at Kid's Best day camp. I'm excited and nervous, like I always am before I embark on a new adventure. I have two goals for my class this summer: (1) Every kid that enters my class knows more about God's love for them when they leave than when they come in and (2) Every kid in my class knows that I love them.
• May 28: I've been working on my One Act again today. I always forget how good it feels to be writing. I don't plan to make a career of it or anything, but I love it. It feels so good to create something that you think might just be good. Someday I'll finish this thing, so help me.
• May 27: Just sitting in book stores reading is my favorite. I sat in Books A Million for like three hours today and I loved it. I think I should consider hanging out there more often.
• May 26: I currently have the only copy of Tara Kennedy's first CD in existence. I have only listened to one and a half songs on it, but those one and a half songs were terrific. I have an extremely talented bestie.
• May 25: Hiding out in my house during a tornado warning is kinda fun. I'm watching The Office and making all kinds of lists. Then I wonder, "Is it lame to make lots of lists on Listography?" Then I realize: I don't care if it's lame. I'm bored and trying not to think about the impending storm and if I want to make lists, by golly, I WILL MAKE LISTS!
• May 24: I am a nerd. I always knew this, but it became especially evident to me today. I am currently sitting in a pile of index cards, Inverts notes, and pens. Plus I have an excel spreadsheet of the organisms I'm studying going. The weird part is (1) I haven't started this class yet and (2) I'm actually enjoying myself. Yeah, I'm a nerd.
• May 23: On this day two years ago I graduated high school. That means that there are some people that I used to talk to every day that I haven't spoken to in two years. Today I'm going to make a list of some of these people to commemorate our "friendship." It's so weird to realize how many people were only in my life for that short season. It also makes me wonder who will still be in my life after I leave Union. And deeply appreciative of those that are still in my life.
  • Amber Dickerson: We had band together. She was really fun and sweet. I think she went to school in Indianapolis or something while I went to school in Tennessee.
  • Cody: I can't even think of his last name. We were costage managers of the spring theatre show. He gave me a bead necklace that I still have. He wanted to be a Nascar crew person. I hope he makes it.
  • Alyssa Fifer: She was one of my closest friends in high school. We had most of our classes together. Her house is the one where we had that New Years party where Olivia wrecked her car and I tried to cuddle with a boy. Good times, good times.
  • Jennifer Ross: Her and I got really close junior year and it stuck. Now I don't even know what she's doing. Whatever it is, I hope she's happy.
  • Appolonia Morehouse: We went to church together but then she moved to Texas. I think she goes to school in Galveston now.
• May 22: I got so caught up in being home that I forgot to do my Listography. It feels good to finally be home.
• May 19: I glanced at my listography and saw that my sophomore greatest hits list is blank and thought, "Aw that is so sad." It's just because I've been to lazy to actually fill it out, but it looks so sad sittin there blank.
• May 18: Real life diagnosis: Denied. I got a good ole "Suck it up" lecture and sent on my. Annoyed face.
• May 17: I'm currently on benidryll because, believe it or not, I woke up this morning with what I thought were allergies going wild. Then I proceeded to run quite a fever and get chills, so now I think it's probably flu. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow at the clinic, so hopefully they'll be able to tell me what's up. It's not Nurse-You-Have-Shingles-Paul, so I hope to get a real life diagnosis.
• May 16: It's unbelievable to me that this semester is nearly over. Wasn't it just yesterday that I was throwing a fit about coming back from Christmas break? I honestly didn't think I was going to survive this semester, but it looks like I did. Amazing.
• May 15: Finals prep is in full swing. I've been working all day and still have more to do. Yay. Hooray.
• May 14: It's sad when something that used to be your favorite becomes a source of dread.
• May 13: My church had a Mystery Trip today! We went to Dyersburg and ate at this fancy steak house, Andy came back from Africa a week early (to the pleasure and surprise of her beau, Rob), and C.J. proposed to Emily. I was deathly ill the whole time but it was incredibly fun anyway. I'm not sorry I went.
• May 12: Last night I rediscovered a show from my childhood: Digimon. I've been watching it a little obsessively ever since. It's like a really bad car accident: it's so terrible, but I just can't look away.
• May 9: I wrote a thought for today, but the next time I got on it was gone. I was super sad. Now I don't remember what it said. A thought lost forever into the abyss.
• May 8: Nope. I still feel the same way that I did yesterday. Maybe tomorrow I'll feel better.
• May 7: I typed out a really obnoxious thought about what's been going on here for the last day or so, but then I realized that ranting on the internet about it is the opposite of godly. If you can't say anything nice, just go ahead and say nothing at all.
• May 6: We initiated a whole new class of APO people tonight. I really enjoyed myself and I like to think that they had fun too. I'm looking forward to a new era in APO.
• May 5: Quality Care's slushies don't have ice.
• May 4: I have too much to do and not enough time to do it. Welcome to the end of the semester my friends. The end is near.
• May 3: Ethnicity is something that I never realized was a big deal until this semester. Talking to Glenae about race has really opened my eyes here.
• May 2: I think I'll always be sentimental about LOST. I started watching it first with Olivia in high school. A lot of stuff happened between the two of us, leading to us no longer being what I would call "best friends" like we used to be. Then, I watched the show alone for awhile. Then, Caitey got into LOST. I started watching it with her and Ryne. During that time my bestie had an evil boyfriend, so she didn't get into LOST. Me and Caitey bonded quite a bit over that show (and over trying to deal with the evil boyfriend). By the time the series finale rolled around I was watching LOST with Tara, Caitey, Casey and Ryne. Plus I had several other people at school that I discussed it with. I thought the finale would be the end, but it really wasn't. I came to Union and started hanging out with Chad and Colt and the three of us came together to watch the show with Chad. As you know, that's how I ended up with my first boyfriend. Which led to losing two people that I considered two of my best friends (the fact that I was wrong doesn't really make it less painful, but I'm pretty much over that now. Really.), which was a hurt I didn't think I would ever get over. I hid away all my season DVDs of LOST for awhile; I couldn't take seeing those sitting on my shelf, reminding me of al the people that left. But now I'm sitting in the living room watching LOST with my roommate Sara. They're no longer in the box and I'm not sorry. It's really going to all be okay. I know this is a dumb rambling Thought but I think it's interesting to look at this one element of my life that touched so many other elements. And if something as ridiculous of a TV show can transcend so much, it gives me hope that everything will be okay. It isn't really over. And I will always be Team Rose and Bernard. And that is all.
• May 1: Today I'm pretty much excited that Tara got a mic. I can't wait to hear her voice pumping through my speakers. And I'll have people in my car and they'll be all, "Who's this? She's great!" and I'll be all, "Oh that's Tara Kennedy. You haven't heard of her. She's totes the best. You can get her CD on iTunes." and they'll be all, "Yeah, I'm gonna do that!"
• April 30: Today I didn't do a single useful thing. I watched House and read and napped and went to Books A Million for like two hours. It was the most unproductive day I've had in a long time.
• April 29: It shouldn't amaze me that getting out of the habit of taking everything to God in prayer makes things better and easier, but it does. Every time.
• April 28: I read the Hunger Games today. Like, literally today. My thoughts? I couldn't stop reading it. I don't think it was the compelling story line (although that was pretty good) or the lyrical skill of the author (she's no John Green) but I couldn't put it down. I think it was this simple fact: Suzanne knows where to end a chapter. Every single chapter ended on a cliffhanger. I HAD to read the next chapter to see what would happen to Katniss. And Peeta. Man oh man am I rooting for Peeta. I don't even know Gale. Team Peeta, all the way! P.S. I hope to purchase the next one tomorrow. Not only does every chapter end on a cliffhanger, but the whole book did. Must. Know. What. Happens.
• April 27: So you know those storms that destroyed Alabama and flooded most of the South? Well, those tornadoes were supposed to hit Union. Like, the faculty was so sure we would get hit that they had made plans to help us get out of the rubble when they did. And at basically the last minute they changed directions. It just hit me how lucky I am that I'm not the one mourning friends and diggning myself out of rubble. I don't know why God chose to shield us and not Alabama, but I am grateful for the protection. I'll be praying for those who weren't spared in this particular disaster.
• April 26: Living in Jackson puts you in the procarious position of deciding what you want to wear in a tornado, where you want to be in the case of a tornado, and what you want to have with you in case you get wiped out. It's a magical mix of terrifying and exciting.
• April 25: Last night I had this really awkward dream wherein all the people I care about most died. It was horribly awkward. For one thing, I had a whole lot of funerals to attend. Some of the people that were important to me made sense: My friends, my family, church members... But some of the people were really interesting: People I haven't talked to in years, people that hurt me, people that I couldn't be happier are out of my life... So I guess it was more like everyone that influenced me in my life. It was weird. I had to give a eulogy at each funeral and for some people it was really tough. So... Yeah. Maybe I should make this into a book. I feel like I could make millions.
• April 24: It amazes me that, on a day like Easter, I am still capable of being completely self-centered and ridiculous. Even this thought is about me. Seriously Lesley. GET OVER YOURSELF.
• April 23: I just want to state for the record that the gap wasn't my fault this time. The great internet failure of 2011 caused Listography to be down for a few days. Thus, I have not been able to update. I'm pretty excited to be back now, though :)
• April 20: Romans 14 says that anything we do that isn't out of faith is sin. That means there is no gray area here. Either we're conciously, actively, faithfully pursuing God in our EVERY action or we are sinning. Bottom line. *mind blown*
• April 19: Sometimes I wonder if you ever REALLY get over things. Like, I'll think I'm totally over something and then something happens and it leaves me feeling the urge to curl into a ball and cry. But even in those times I have to trust that Jesus understands and will let me cry on His shoulder. He always gives me strength to get past that.
• April 18: I really hate early mornings :(
• April 17: Today I accidentally gave fuel to a firey debate about whether or not you should take a girl on a date to McDonald's. I mean, I'm Team No. Sorry boys, I let it happen once, but I won't let it happen again.
• April 16: Today was glorious. I spent the whole entire day watching The Office and working on homework and basically recharging. Last week was so sressful that I just needed some time to lock myself in my room and not come out for anything. It was wonderful.
• April 15: Today I watched the bonus epilogue ending of LOST. You should definitely be jealous. It made me miss the confusion and joy that is LOST.
• April 14: I don't come from an affection family or friend group. I'm not complaining; I'm just explaining. I grew up never really hugging or exchanging mushy pleasantries or anything. That's not really a big deal, except that now I'm in college I'm so socially awkward and weird because everyone wants to hug and be affectionate and crap. I just feel so awkward all the time. How am I the most socially awkward person I know?
• April 13: Today I wore a tiara to class because it seemed fun. I want to do more things just because they sound like fun to me. I only have One Person to impress, and I think He likes it when I just act like myself. And I'm the kind of girl who would wear a tiara to class.
• April 12: Busy weeks make it so hard to find time to plug into the Word. I know Jesus should be most important, but I have to do my homework sometime. Finding that balance is really, really hard.
• April 11: Today I had a super duper obnoxious debate with one of my friends. He just kept arguing with me over things that don't matter at all. It was so, so stupid. It got me thinking: Why do we as Christians argue amongst ourselves? Wouldn't our time be better spent finding ways to grow closer as Christians and minister to others? I know that we don't always agree, but there's a difference between disagreeing in love and disagreeing for disagreement's sake. One is centered on Christ and one is centered on us.
• April 8-10: Yes, I'm cheating here. I went on a retreat with my college group this weekend and I didn't bring my laptop to avoid the distraction. It was absolutely amazing! I was so encouraged just to spend time with a huge group of people that love Jesus. I got to form new relationships and hear from Jesus in a way that I don't get to around here too often. I also got super sunburnt, am helping with the events team at my church, and managed to not get injured at all.
• April 6: God isn't done with me. Even when I suck.
• April 5: I hate it when I screw up. I mean, everyone hates it when they screw up, it just seems like a I do it so much more often than your average person.
• April 4: Not a single interesting thing happened to me today.
• April 3: I have the greatest friends. Like Tara. We had a super long text conversation yesterday and it was so encouraging and good. She's always there for me and I appreciate that about her. A lot. I hope I can always be there for her too.

Kay. Too cheesey. Not. Gonna. Make. It.

• April 2: Watching RENT today made me think (1) how grateful I am that I have Jesus and (2) that maybe I should consider being a little more careful what I watch. RENT is pretty dang riske and I drove a solid three hours out of my way to watch it. I really, really enjoyed it (and I'm not committing to not watching the movie/listening to the music) but it maks me wonder: Would Jesus be proud of me for watching it? Or is this one of those things that isn't that big of a deal? Hmm...
• April 1: I only fell for one joke today, and it was at 8 in the morning. A couple made it sound like they were engaged, but I didn't do anything embarrassing like ask them or comment on their facebooks or anything like that. So it was more productive than last year, when I fell for a pretty dumb prank involving one of my actor's in Mousetrap and a horrific face injury. You know, I still laugh about that situation every single time I think about it, though.
• March 31: Sorry I've forgotten to write the last couple of days. Brief update: 12 hour days, stage managing show, dealing with idiots, trying to love the idiots like Christ wants me to, freaking out about everything. Yup. Sums it up.
• March 27: Turns out, when you're trying to do what God wants you to do, stuff gets harder. Like, all your actors start complaining before you even have one rehearsal. Just for example.
• March 26: Sorry I missed a few days. I got distracted by the awesome that was NYC and DC. I got to see the Smithsonians and Spiderman on Broadway and Time Square and yeah! What was the best part of the trip? Well, my favorite was the late-night conversations with the girls, of course.
• March 21: AAAAH AIR AND SPACE MUSEUM EINSTEIN BOBBLEHEAD AAAAH!
• March 20: NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM: SO SO SO COOL! ZOO ALSO COOL! AAAAAAH I'M SO TIRED. This is pretty much my entire thought process today.
• March 19: When did our country's war status become so... facebooky? Remember back in the day when you were either in a war or you weren't? When did we add the "It's Complicated" option?
• March 18: "If the south rose again, black people would win. They have guns now."
• March 17: Devon's Hurt got cast today. I dressed up like a leprachaun. Packing for DC. Want cheeseburger.
• March 16: I tried to be cynical today, I really did. But I got to go to church tonight and study the most convicted passage in the history of the world. And then as soon as I left, I got the opportunity to put the passage into practice. And then my roommate offered to do my laundry. And then I got all warm fuzzies when I read Tara's listography. AND children's show auditions went really well today. AND I'll be in New York City in a week. So really, what do I have to be cynical about today?
• March 15: I'm not even going to pretend like I'm not beyond excited that Tara's coming to DC with me. And that she gave me a St. Patrick's Day Challenge :] Stuff like this (the challenge, I mean) tells me that we are going to be friends forever, even when I'm ridiculous and don't ever go home and insist on galavanting around the country over the summer and stuff like that. I'm not worried about the Tara-Lesley friendship. We're gonna make it. I'm going to write something really cynical tomorrow to make up for the amount of cheesiness in this particular post.
• March 14: So, like, how does a person minister to their friends, people they have an established routine with? I know this isn't a novel problem. I swear we talked about it in youth group like once a quarter, but appearently I wasn't listening. Also, why does everyone else seem super able to listen to God's voice, obey His command, and come off as super loving and awesome ALL THE TIME (yeah, I'm lookin at you, Glenae)?! Sometimes I seriously think that my genetic code had to be somehow defective and I just didn't get the gene for tact. And niceness. Like, I really, really love the people around me. I spend time on my knees for them. But somehow I am incapable of expressing this love to them. Defffffective.
• March 13: So I'm reading this book called "Never the Bride." It's a Christian novel. I realize that these tend to really, really suck, but this one is actually really really good. God starts appearing to this single-but-marriage-obsessed lady in the flesh. In the last chapter I read, she was at the beach with her best-guy-friend-and-love-interest. He goes and gets her a milkshake, and God chooses that moment to show up. He tells her that He likes spending time with her, but she tells Him that He needs better timing and HE's not the one she wants to be with at the moment. He just says okay and walks off. Oh my goodness. That was heartbreaking. God is he only one that loves me no matter what. Even though I long to be someone's choice, I am always God's choice. I'm praying now that He would also always be my first choice.
• March 12: I've noticed my thoughts are getting less and less interesting as I go.
• March 11: Appearently there's a fire raging throughout the main square of my hometown. Well, that's terrifying. I'm definitely praying about THAT.
• March 10: I think being a techie is great practice for being a Christian. You never get acknowleged, except when something goes horribly wrong, and when you're doing your job right, no one notices you at all; they only notice the more important elements: the actual show. It can be frustrating to be a techie. It can be hard. But, hey, so's being a Christian.
• March 9: Jesus is our peace. I've been learning a lot about peace and today a girl in the theatre gave me a card about peace. And hugged me. And it felt really, really good.
• March 8: Uggggh.... Mondays.
• March 7: Note to self: If you're dating someone whose favorite songs are all break up songs, the relationship is not going anywhere good.
• March 6: I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL SPRING BREAK! WASHINGTON DC, WOOOO! (P.S. You should check out me and Glenae's blog. Do it.)
• March 5: Today Glenae and I made a website to share our wisdom with the world... Yeah, lol. We thought it would be fun and we wanted a good way to share what God is doing in our lives. We're far from professional, but we're having fun and trying to make our corner of the world a better place. Check it out! And if you want to be involved, by all means, please let us know. www.hurtladies.weebly.com
• March 4: Letting go of something is only letting go if you really surrender it and be okay with not getting it back. That's hard to do, but it's beyond worth it.
• March 3: I suck SO BAD at making decisions. How is it possible for a twenty year old person to be unable to make their own decisions? Get your act together, Lesley.
• March 2: Is there ever a time when self-preservation needs to overtake the Golden Rule? Is there ever a time to say, "Helping you is hurting me. I can't cry for you anymore."? Is it Biblical to ever walk away from someone? The next issue is, of course, when part of you doesn't want to walk away.
• March 1: This is H-E-Double hockey sticks week for me. Four tests in three days, plus two major projects. So. Tired. Want. To. Sleep.
• February 28: I had this really great thought of the day about all the progress I made in the last couple of days, but that will have to wait because I have something better to discuss: HOW AMAZING MY BESTIE IS. She has a youtube channel going on which she has posted a few original songs. I love them. All. I want them on my iPod. Now. Go to youtube and look up tarakennedy91. Do it now. You won't be sorry.
• February 27: I get a deep satisfaction out of completing a draft of a fictional work. The only writing I've ever finished a complete draft of (other than really shamefully bad poetry and school assignments) is the one act play I'm writing. It's not finished yet, but there's something wonderful about knowing that you have assembled a complete, sensical plot. It's one of the best feelings in the world. And it only gets better with rewriting. I love it when I find a section that really sucks in my first draft, then I sit down and focus on it and it comes out somewhere between okay and actually good. I have no idea if I'll ever get to direct this one act (I hope I will) but even if I don't, there's something really satisfying about working on it. It makes me feel like maybe someday I'll do something that matters.
• February 26: I sorta kinda really want to open a cupcake shop for real. Tara and I would have so much fun doing that.
• February 25: I'm ridiculously excited to be going to Sullivan today :] It's weird, because I feel like it's difficult to leave Union. Like, it feels like I'm leaving for a long break again (but not like the last one. NEVER like the last one). Seriously, I'm only going to be gone for, like, one whole day and two halves of a day. But I'm so, so excited to get home and see my bestie and the parents and my church. Get ready to party, Sullivan. I'm coming for you.
• February 24: Tornado sirens went off again today. I know that a tornado hit here a few years ago, but I've never actually been in one, so while everyone else is running around freaking out about the sirens, I'm just thinking, "Guys, you're fine. We're fine. We're going to make it. Chill. For real." I'm not sure this is the best philosophy. I mean, I didn't even pack a tornado bag last night. I guess I'm just not appropriately scared of the storms here.
• February 23: I think