listography: I LOVE

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What a beautiful face I have found in this place that is circling all round the sun. What a beautiful dream that could flash on the screen in a blink of an eye and be gone from me. Let me hold it close and keep it here with me. And one day we will die and our ashes will fly from the aeroplane over the sea. But for now we are young, let us lay in the sun and LIST every beautiful thing we see.

LINKS...

listography	IMPORTANT NOTICES
	NEWS
Ryan	activities (Hikes, Walks, BP Trips + Outdoor Stuff)
	movies (In theaters, TV series, or docs)
	books (reading, read, bookclub)

Ryan	adam
Spooner's No Fun	karilyn

I LOVE

cooking and chatting with the most interesting people over for dinner
when I make family home videos and the music/lyrics line up accidentally perfectly
hearing the graduation ceremony every year from our porch and all the applause
when someone introduces you to a new snack from a store you always go to
protesters standing up against fascism
sitting in a dark theater with film lovers, esp if we cry together
that no matter how many people James meets out in the world, or amongst my friends, I have rarely ever heard him talk ill of anyone, not even his exes.
feeling a slight sense of gloating when I'm walking down hill on a hike, and everyone is exhausted trying to get up the hill (even though I was just in their shoes)
when you can make a strange but delicious lunch from various leftovers
how happy the flowers get from rainwater
loving inside of a music bio-pic
seeing little old ladies leaving the nursery with their flowers
when our tree sprouts its first leaves in spring
when you walk by a house and you hear someone playing piano or violin
a friendly chat with a cab driver
when I do something for the kid, and it brings her visible happiness and the hugs that follow.
when rumi accidentally falls off the bed in the middle of the night. and he’s embarrassed.
when a dog bark is actually ruff ruff ruff
sharing an owl spotting with a stranger in a park
when our neighbors throw big parties and play puerto rican tunes and it feels like new york
recalling an old memory
james’ obsession with romantic time travel novels
when friends send me their demo songs before others get to hear them
when my plant rises to former glory after a watering
fall leaves
moss growing over tree branches
when people regularly leave flowers at the site where their loved ones died
seeing friends’ bands play
cleaning patio furniture
when a houseguest uses a space somewhere that no one in our family uses
when my gynecologist points out my poop on a ultrasound
homemade breakfast on the porch
dog walking during Halloween season
the street lights when the fog fills the air at night
that the planet came with so many varieties of nuts and flowers
when your teen randomly texts from school that she's making a playlist that reminds her of me and her dad
how we always want to move to wherever we visit and then remember how much we love our front and backyard, weather, and our neighbors
when strangers look at you, but then their face turns sour lol
the phrase “transgender sex operations on illegal aliens in prison.”
late night dinners outdoors with friends
favorite music on a sad day
paddington's hard stare for when people have forgotten their manners
when one of my cacti surprises me with a flower
gardening at night
birds drying out their wings in the sunlight
moonlight
close friends who have done the dance of reciprocity with support, cheerleading, and therapizing for decades
campaign finance reform
the bravery of whistleblowers
already knowing something I wanna see on tv (not having to search)
looking forward to future plans, like girl trips or vacations
seeing someone learn to rollerskate and being wobbly and sweetly off-balance
when there’s no clouds, but for some reason, the sun is soft
rejecting website cookies
when RUMI puts his chin on any part of my body and makes little licking noises with his mouth
movie endings where the main character dies and everyone from their past, including earlier versions of themselves, and dead family members all come.
life experiments that seem hard at the time but are fond chapters later
all the spring flowers in bloom
my dog's face after I remove a thorn from his paw
the power, bravery, and optimism of anti-war groups, that spring up every generation
flowers that grow through the sidewalk cracks
cloudy foggy mornings
the distant sound of the high school marching band practicing
james’ all expenses paid book engagements
wacky tube man inflatable dancing machines for businesses
when our teen is in a good mood
narrating what dogs are thinking
introverted dogs at the dog park
when I spot the first buds on my trees in springtime
when my dog sleeps with his darn teddy bear
bread
making a mess in hotel rooms in a way I’d never do at home
old vintage decorative tins
the magical experience of the city's wild flock of green parrots flying by my upstairs bedroom window
when a sweet memory just randomly returns --like feeding Rumi frozen cantaloupe in the kitchen when he was a puppy, and listening to his slow gnawing
old friends who magically turn up right when you need them
the smell of chimney smoke in the winter
watching my neighbor’s dog sleep in the sunlight from my bedroom window
boobs - why are boobs so great?
our neighborhood friends and community
cab drivers in foreign countries who listen to American country music
the bravery of people who speak up for others
the commeraderie amongst people at protests
the sisterly love when you stop a woman to whisper her dress is accidentally tucked into her underwear
when people dance their way to the dance floor
decorative lights on trees
my mother's cooking
stars in our night sky
ufo testimony
that we all pull over to help a suffering stranger in an ambulance get through faster
watching the roller skaters at Venice Beach
smoking, dancing, drinking at the same time (those were the days)
when you recommend something you love to a friend and they pull out their phone to jot it down
the strength and organizing of trade unions
seeing American Asians finally getting film roles
how we have to seek out a dozen vegan pastries to take with us on an hour hike
when traveling and finding your favorite little spot you eat at repeatedly
when I spend a day “hiking” through shops to look for cute hiking shoes instead of hiking
rumi searching for cats and enjoying the breeze on the porch while I sit nearby reading
when my father would surprise me with a story I didn’t know
the stoic faces of security guards next to the stage at concerts (or when you catch them getting into it)
watching joy on H’s face dancing with her friends and her not knowing
a surprise street fair
the sound of a duck quack
art cars —even if they’re lame
a secret smile on an older woman’s face
aging out of hyper-culture
those tyrannosaurus rex costumes
when rumi poops right next to a trash can
the magic of a fruit bearing tree
moonlight through the bathroom window when I’m peeing in the middle of the night
airport support dogs walking around to calm and bring joy (and pigs)
hugging my ex, now friend, the day before he's about to have his first baby
Robert Smith endlessly
how my partner's body fits perfectly outside of mine when we snuggle
seeing my friend Nyles play in a band with his son --full circle
stop and chats in the neighborhood with other dog walkers
when I hear my mom in my sneeze
listening to Magnetic Fields while cleaning the house and remembering the fun decade in the bay area indie-rock scene (friends' bands, late nights, cigarettes, warehouse parties, my club, and dancing) I love having those different times captured so strongly in music. I can go back whenever I want.
body temperature weather at sunset
walking around a flea market
when people hide likes on instagram but just on photos no one liked lol
deep sea diving videos of insanely magical creatures
watching what rumi chooses to eat first from his daily snack plate
the adaptability of three legged dogs
that extreme wealth and fame can bring their own unique form of demise
when a co-parenting talk immediately yields results
dogs hanging out a car window, esp when you pull up next to them
that when I buy treats with peanut butter in them, H & J won't eat them because they hate peanut butter so the treats are always there for me!
my warm water bidet
how this teen still opens the door to hug me if I say goodnight while she’s in the bathroom
giving rumi bad mom haircuts where I accidentally create a few bald spots
our neighborhood filled with the high school track team, jogging all around the streets after school
muscular kangaroos
the most favorite thing a young girl has ever said to me: “there’s no way poop could be fancy, even if there’s glitter on it.”
girl talks in bed with Hollis
storefronts or signs that have remnants from the 70s or 80s
dogs with jobs
the in-between days when I don't have to wash my hair
seeing a great new band in a small venue with no following (it feels like your secret)
the sound of teen kids laughing during H’s slumber party
new cleaning tools!
people who are outrageously nice at their jobs for no reason at all (desk check in, parking attendant, etc)
unpacking - so much easier
magic erase pads
restaurants with big cozy booths
how the spectrum of queer elevates humanity simply through their affirmation to exist
someone’s lost balloons floating through the sky
buying a dress that I wear out of the store - esp while traveling and finding a light dress in hot weather and trading out what I’m wearing
gender fluidity
abortion rights
an Indian veg thali or an ethiopian veggie combo
falling asleep to cool fresh air through an open window
stray dogs who accidentally run marathons
optical illusions
surprise emotional giveaways on shows
walking around new or foreign cities
music documentaries or biopics
discovery of a perfect smoothie
finding ways to tell H. how wonderful she is or how much I like her as a person outside of being a stepparent
symmetry in flowers
trying on glasses and hats
rabbit agility youtube videos (kaninhop)
black hole recordings from NASA
the skip in Rumi’s step when he finds a good stick
the phrase: “poor pussy management”
my beautiful tailor from Guatemala I’ve been going to for years
when I find something I’ve lost, esp when I go back and look for it and find it in the street
frozen blueberries
things I can't have: wine, garlic, and tomato sauce
the last bite of an ice cream cone
fortune cookie readings
warm hugs goodbye
surprise friends in town
latte anything
really hot showers
telling James to go stand next to people for height comparison
being in love
when I can repurpose something for something else
when hollis asks us to put her to bed cuz she’s too tired
the sound of our dog making dreaming noises at night and his little paws moving like he’s running through a field
youtube battle rap holes with james
evening dog walks on a warm night
hearing James and Hollis laughing when he tucks her in for bed every night
talking to god in my car
getting refunds for things because of good customer service
people who don’t bring family business into the street (maurice hines)
loyal dog stories that break my heart, like a recent hiker found dead after missing for two weeks with his emaciated dog alive by his side
watching old “public access” YouTube videos with James
that we're all just here trying to figure things out...with the varying materials we are given
that there are 5,000 confirmed planets beyond our solar system
falling asleep with each of us having one hand on each other
language that conveys sophistication, intelligence, and empathy when discussing complex issues
discovering a new favorite food
investigative documentaries
how he makes me feel beautiful about being five years older than him (he stopped dating a younger actress after our 1st date - on good terms w/her tho). It's hard feeling confident within a greater agenda that sells youth so I appreciate him being anti to all that.
watching dogs (and rumi) play
pbs news hour - for perspective and knowledge
watching rumi discover something he's never seen before, like a crow
standing at the kitchen counter mid-day and eating a treat (like a cookie, piece of chocolate, etc)
laying on the sofa and playing brain & word games with James, like old folks
how when I go to the gym, I look for the closest parking space!?
when James brings me flowers and Hollis hides and plays a sexy saxophone soundtrack in the background on her phone for it
little rituals, like dog walking sunday mornings for a bagel and matcha
the friendships we’ve made in our neighborhood while walking rumi
the smell of wet asphalt after it rains
gift certificates of any kind
when I have an overly emotional freak out response and he still sweetly apologizes and gives me time and space to work through it
the decades I grew up in
bird conferences on telephone wires
the instant returned connection with old friends
having my hair washed at the salon or when Hollis braids my hair when watching tv
the karmic law that people will be eaten away at and defined by their anger/hate
our neighborhood parrot singing italian opera
when people are driving with trees in the back of their pickup trucks
when actors give thoughtful speeches
a surprise cloudy or rainy day in LA
introducing Hollis to my favorite movies and music and seeing/hearing it again thru her eyes
when James randomly texts me if I need anything from Ross, cause he's at Ross, and always seems to stop at Ross, and it makes me laugh every time
when you hear a line from a movie or read it in a book and it just hits your soul perfectly. Recently: "It’s painful wanting something and not wanting it at the same time." - Scenes From a Marriage
when the printer just works
when you're at the post office and no one is there but then suddenly all these people are in line behind you
when I get to add to this list!
when I am on a dog walk and I come across a yard sale!!
when I make a banking miscalculation and discover I had more money than I thought
when a package comes earlier than expected
the sight of super heroes you pose with for dollars on their lunch breaks eating and smoking (yoga, capt america and superman).
the sound of crows communicating on the wires above our house
my dog looking into my eyes
soul train dancing youtube holes late at night
when fruits come into season and they're exactly perfect
when james is wrapped around me on one side and my dog is on the other and they're both doing little twitches while falling asleep on me
when a restaurant meal is big enough for lunch the next day
the beautiful geometry and symmetry of snowflakes
sex and cuddling
witnessing James and Hollis' mom co-parent together over the past years
reparations
when something falls out my mouth and I actually find where it fell
avocados - can't stop won't stop
when families become advocates for a particular cause after losing a loved one
those dancing tube men air monsters flailing about that are promoting a place and have wild flapping arms and take on crazy formations
little conversations I hear him and Hollis having through the years from another room (esp when she asks questions about his life)
when james spoons me every night and I can feel him breath in the smell of my neck
the way the sunlight hits my porch each day (precisely the right amount of light to make it feel like a benevolent being is there)
hollis's mature sense of humor and how she cracks me up all the time
starling murmurations
when people are trying to be discrete with filming or taking a picture but the flash light is on and they get all embarrassed
when people have very few followers on YouTube or elsewhere but share thoughtful beautiful things
giant singular ice cubes in fancy drinks
Yosemite Sam and his cussing bag
the night I’ve planted new plants and I'm thinking about them out in the yard
when you give a compliment about the food to a server and they seem really proud of it
the sound of james in flip-flops
when one dog gets to be off leash but the other dogs are on leash (he knows he's special)
when people are using a SUPER cracked glass phones
fun uber pool rides with strangers
hollis's hugs and love
when people are mad at art in modern art museums
when mission control is relieved and celebrates in NASA-related movies
when toothpaste lasts the entirety of a trip
when dogs lay their chin on me while resting
black folks dancing to 80s music but with hiphop styles
dogs
all the mariachi bands that play in my neighborhood every year around graduation
cacti of every kind
dioramas
great poops
when people can't get the beat right on a clap to music
the wild highland park parrots
when my dog seems to be smiling at me
when an item has like one star or a movie has like 10% tomatoes --so funny
when tour bus drivers are ready to go home and they drive super fast and the tourists are flying by and trying to take pictures
when a BIG line forms right after you've ordered!!!!!!
when you great have sex with a random person in your dream
the house right after its been cleaned and the chores are done
when you drive by someone on the freeway and they're smiling, like probably listening to their favorite radio show
honey
magic shows
the first sleep in my bed after returning from a great trip
seeing tourists at airport wearing all the stuff you see on the streets for sale
kids who have their own little suitcase when traveling
when you think you're annoying the cab driver while chatting with your friends but then when you get out he says something super nice and smiles
seeing big men walking tiny little dogs
secretly taking cash from Adam's wallet
when someone makes an incredible documentary about a current problem and it moves you enough to donate money or sign petitions to help (i.e. the cove, virunga, death on a factory farm)
birds birds birds
walking with Toki around the silver lake reservoir listening to my special playlist at sunset
when my dad talks about movies I specifically rent for him but he thinks netflix just sends it randomly (esp when he says he "got a really good one this week")
75 degree days
pulling out my cozy winter jackets and feeling like I'm seeing old friends again
taking a cozy nap at an unexpected time
getting things in the mail (not bills, etc)
the brief pause before the movie starts
when I get a text from a friend at just the right moment when I needed it and I have a happy cry
recognizing the smell of a flower or tree when you're walking down the street
the feeling when you've decided to take a trip somewhere
when clouds allow you to see the rays of light from the sun
to go back in time on google maps and see my mom's flowers when she was still alive
feeling alignment and connection
the smell of fresh herbs before cooking, esp dill
when it feels like a specific prayer was answered
the sound of someone practicing piano
a good cry
a surprise summer storm
the distinct taste of a strawberry
finding a favorite dress
big butterflies
when someone passes me on the street and says hi
getting something right after a couple failed attempts
when animals make human expressions
when a beam of sunlight is visible in a forest through rain
thinking about my plants after I've planted them
a great hour of public radio (the moth hour or this american life)
when you hear those first few notes of your favorite song when seeing a band perform
putting fresh flowers into a vase
when a hummingbird looks like it's landed to watch me (and I like to think it is someone I know)
the first day you head out to explore a new city when traveling
the perfect flavor of tea or coffee (when it is so absolutely at its best)
watering a plant after I've first planted it
when a piece of fruit is at its most perfect ripeness (like you're eating it in its most beautiful prime)
birds singing when I'm waking in the morning
streets just after a soft rain
when girls who have "values" names like faith, hope, charity, patience, etc get into fights
when mechanical mannequins hold advertising signs on the street and they look like they hate their job
when all the jasmine blooms in the neighborhood
the sound of a hard rain and rain storms
when I say my prayer at night without falling asleep
hanging just the right thing on my wall
how my body feels after a hot bath
the first bite of dessert brought to a table
snow under a street light
sunsets that make you tear up
planning a trip
the first day you wear a new outfit
organizing a drawer
when Adam and I keep our feet touching as we fall asleep
seeing friends when they're sleeping over eating cereal at our counter when I wake up
when toki smells like grapes
making a home, all the little details
waveless beaches in the caribbean
seeing a rainbow
animal videos and pictures
randomly witnessing kindness
warm water
walking the silver lake reservoir with Toki at sunset
when i have enough coins to go to the coin-star machine
when people have secret smiles on their faces on the train or walking down the street
when i think i left and forgot something but then i realize i have it
making my dad laugh
the sound of ocean waves
when a spaghetti jar can be turned into an awesome glass
when cats make biscuits with their paws
penguins wearing backpacks to buy fish (ok it's just a YouTube video)
parades and marches
when an animal uses a tool, like a stick to pull out ants, etc
snow on the first day
the feel of clean sheets
when people cry from happiness or laughter
when dogs are seen carrying their own toys or their own leash while out on a walk
when babies make adult expressions
seeing homeless folks reading the newspaper or a book
when people laugh at their own jokes
duck butts
folding warm laundry on my lap
seeing young kids order their meals by themselves
when birds or dogs tilt their heads at you when trying to understand
when people save the lives of a small thing, ie, bugs etc
the 1 minute piece devoted to a nature scene on cbs sunday morning
when dogs kick and make noises during doggy dreams
the car right after a car wash
an intimate dinner with a friend
the first sip of a warm drink
paws of any kind
laughing simultaneously with an audience
the quietness of a suburban dog walk
the meditative feeling of doing something with your hands
a long good conversation in person or on the phone
goths
movies and popcorn
diversity in everything: sexuality, brains, culture, etc...
lists
art of every kind

nov 18 2009 ∞
jul 5 2025 +