- How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are? It depends on the context of the question. Physically, I'll probably think I was a 14 year old with ADD, unless I walked around in the nude, which isn't legal, though rumor has it that it is now legal to walk around topless on hot days in New York City. But this has gotten way out of hand. Mentally, if I heard myself in a conversation, I would think I was a mid-20s college graduate with dysrhythmia & the product of the professors-preach-liberalism quota. And as a poetess (self-proclaimed and Farrell-indoctrinated) I would assume I have the voice of an author, which is a very aged voice, almost like a sharp cheese that's been fermenting in Holland & therefore lie limitless to numbers through my adoxographic praise and equal disdain for the Earth & its dressings. Word up.
- Which is worse, failing or never trying? Failing! Failing! There is nothing in the world nearly as frightening as failing, and though I'm an advocate of trying, I myself have problems following through with it, because what if I swallow all my pride and am brazen with courage and strength in my convictions and my convictions are WRONG. It's a flat-out humiliation. And all I've got are brains, so when my brains fail, I fail, and when I fail, I beg a carcass to be. So moral of the story is that never trying is terribly worse than failing -failure is what makes successes afterall- but I'm too damn terrified of the prospect to even remotely invest in it myself. -Wipes sweaty brow-
- If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do? Because of the great conspiracy of pathway that society formulates for us to follow, that does so desire obtaining and maintaining roles to play in the society. If we don't fit our roles, from a cross cultural sociological perspective, we as a people fail in the most intricate way a human part of such a vast network can fail---we fail as a part of humanity. So we follow our roles, no matter if they include bearing to what those roles entail, forever wishing to be apart of the role we WISH we were cast. I mean, I know we ultimately can choose our roles, but the pressures of each small and large group of societal complexity structure us to bunch into one, quite suffocated, and whatever role we do choose, we often end up unhappy with, too fixated on time to realize that we DO have the time to do whatever we wanted to. But I don't know, enough with the philosophy---- I don't want to start zoning off into creepy existentialist gateways.
- When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done? HAHA. Absolutely! I'm a poetess, self-proclaimed and Farrell indoctrinated. I write to become... and I can be anything on a paper. Ultimately, I've done little but MUCH internally. It doesn't work the other way around. If I was out doing, I couldn't be "in" writing, and writing is what I love.
- What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world? I'm make everyone stop their space exploration and cut funding for NASA, as it is a total ruin of a decision to explore the unknown when we have SO much here on our own planet to understand and work with. BUT I watched a very interesting short today about asteroids and how we are able to detect, deflect and protect ourselves from them, and this proves useful. If the dinosaurs funded NASA they too could have survived natural collisions--- so maybe I'll revoke my statement, maybe I won't.
- If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich? Charity and writing! Two of life's most simple pleasures. I would be a billionaire. So many things make me happy---- I am not as much of a grump as I like to act out to be. Children, food, talents, art, giving, helping, hugging, bopping. It's all so happy. But what if you have a chemical imbalance and can't help your unhappiness? Then you'd be dirt poor, by genetic disposition. And I don't approve of that sort of casting! Let's stick to money---which you can be born into, out of, but always work towards.
- Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? Ha. I've been asking myself a lot lately. But I am doing what I believe in. I'm confused, I have little direction, but I've got to do what I believe in and something tells me that education is the path that I should study, my passions for English are clear, I'm happily committed in a relationship I want to grow---I'm going through the cycles that everyone goes through and I'm trying my best not to "settle" for the circumstances but to believe in their justice to me! As best as I can, at least.
- If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? I would throw out everything I mentioned in the previous question, apart from my lover, and live at home, doing nothing but what I wanted. There would be no need for all this money to be funneled into higher education! At 20 my life would be half over. I could just read books, I could work a labor job, or I could go IN labor, with twins or a boy or a little bitty girl, but it all wouldn't matter. Every day would be passion!
- To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken? I have such mixed feelings. I do believe I am the master of my fate and the captain of my ship and insert all the metaphors here, BUT I am compelled by something to believe in some kind of predestiny, where this is how life is SUPPOSED to work for me, where I am but a pawn in a stage that's been set. Either way though, I believe that I believe to succumb to that fate, and follow it as I see it calling to me--- and alter it when it begs to be altered???
- Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? Doing the right things! There are so many ways to do things and people can't tell you if they are right or wrong, but I could actually probably tell you---because I'm an elitist--- but all jokes aside, yeah, concern should always be for good intention! And to carry out those intentions fully!
- You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do? I interject always, whatever the situation, my full and honest opinion, and the reasons why my opinion is superior, with supporting evidence, excellent verbage & moral backings.
- If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? A newborn child? I would kiss his/her little head and tell him/her that nothing will ever matter more than to find what they love and cling to it.
- Would you break the law to save a loved one? YEAHDUH. Laws are meant to be broken. And if this law-breaking thing involves me in Stilettos and a little black dress with an AK-47 slung over my back----hell yeah I'm breaking that law. HELL. YEAH.
- Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity? Well I'm driven by insanity. I am drawn to people, things, ideas, that are exclusively insane BECAUSE I believe they are creative and thought-provoking.
- What’s something you know you do differently than most people? I take my royal dumps with the water running so as to not disturb myself with thoughts of other people hearing my droppings.
- How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy? Because happiness is a subjective experience! That's such an obvious question.
- What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back? Cut my hair all off. And it's because a---my head is too round for that and b----I want it long at the very same time.
- Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? You mean my nightlight??? :( Don't pull that card.
- If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why? I'd move to New York because I only like the Tri-state area and I don't even like New Jersey so hey, that leaves one eligible destination.
- Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster? No, usually I wait for someone else to push it for me because I'm a queen.
- Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? A worried genius! The thought of being an idiot makes me want to drown myself in gasoline and jump into a bonfire.
- Why are you, you? Because I am a genetic pattern that no one else has and a mind that no one else can read, that certainly goes against the grain as often as it wishes.
- Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? Yes and no. I'm pretty uninvolved because of HIGH SCHOOL and its melodramatic aspects such as FRIENDS STABBING YOU IN THE HEART AND EATING IT RAW.
- Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you? Losing touch. Because obvious because I am being forced and guilted into writing fast.
- What are you most grateful for? My gentleman.
- Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones? Lose the old ones!!!! I need that stuff. What else will I complain about? :/
- Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first? Absolutely not. Hence why I challenge everything. I'm a true cynist.
- Has your greatest fear ever come true? No, and I hope it never does. Allah please to be making it not.
- Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? Er, 13 yrs. old!? I ain't remember nothing about that time.
- What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special? Sitting under my tree singing. It was my happy tree. I could come up with a better one but I'm being pressured.
- At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? Er, today! Because I aim for that.
- If not now, then when? I said now.
- If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose? What?
- Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever? No, but that sounds really splendid.
- Why do religions that support love cause so many wars? ASK ALLAH. I don't know!!!!
- Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil? In your teeny little heart, yah, you can guess.
- If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? Probably not because that's irresponsible.
- Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing? More work I actually enjoy doing! I love work! Especially paperwork! Gimme all the paperwork!
- Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before? I do nothing every day. I've become very unhappy now.
- When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in? Er, I don't think I've every done that. That was a cheeseball, spacey question.
- If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? My sister and my gentleman and my father, mother, cat, cat.
- Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous? I think I'm good.
- What is the difference between being alive and truly living? 99% of people are just alive, just copies of what they think they should emulate, without generating new thoughts, new ideas, or seeking something greater in themselves.
- When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right? Always. Always, always, always. Now is the time, tomorrow is the time.
- If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? Because it's humiliating and you have to live with it and can't correct what already happened, just what's to come, and that's not very effacing.
- What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? Nothing. I do everything as I wish.
- When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing? It's pretty loud since I'm an asthmatic soooo.
- What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love? I love most things, actually. I just don't openly express it. But when I write, I do, and when I can make physical connections to the things I love, I do.
- In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that? Nope. I won't remember it at all. And that's depressing. Thanks for bringing that up.
- Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you? I am making them for myself and I wish more people in my life would help guide me, or would independently make their decisions too, so I could see that at least every one is making decisions they intended.
jul 24 2013 ∞
jul 24 2013 +