- It smells like the sea
- Fruit really IS nature's candy!
- Gooble! Gooble!
- My school ID makes me look like a dirty hobo
- Booty [instead of "Darn" or "Crap", etc.]
- Piggys are yummy with a buttery blanket
- Jeez, sir
- I don't like people
- They get too close
- I parking
- How come there's a midwest but not a mideast?
- I just filled an old Starbucks cup with puke while driving. I have skills. Time to take my final.
- Poor buttcrack
- Nobody likes creepy kids
- Newman on Seinfeld has a poster of butter on his wall. I thought of you.
- Jack from the box is back!
- Wow! I just took a bite of a strawberry and I did a double-take to make sure I wasn't eating candy.
- I Hate math in the spring time i hate math in the snow. I Hate math anytime, my teacher is a big HO HO HO!
- Hat i tink
- Your mouth is silly huge.
- I think daddy looks like the oatmeal man
- I just saw a commercial with Brett Favre for wrangler jeans. NICE!
- The sky's so big - it's got to be the biggest thing on earth!
- Do you think of Goodnight Moon when you hear Cyndi Lauper's Time After Time?
- You just made me laugh so hard that snot shot out of my nose.
- We're smart one class at a time.
- I just found the biggest peanut of all time! I'm gonna save it and show it to you!
- The Moon Bananas are staying strong.
- I can't wait to have a heart attack after I eat it! [Re: the new Taco Bell bacon burrito]
- Who would cook for 24? It's called a restaurant.
- Math sucks oh math suckS. I can't OH MY GOSH SOMEONE IS BBQ-ING SOMETHING AND IT SMELLS SO GOOD! Anyway, imagine a situation where someone would use equations this complicated. I bet JPL doesn't even use equations this complicated!
- I take nap now.
- Alan's hair smells like cheezits. Yummy!
- Doik.
- The twins hold hands :{
- Stupid Pendragon made me cry.
- AHHHHHHH! PENDRAGON IS SO GOOD!
- Grapes are little sugar bombs!
- OH I'M SUCH A TWI-TARD!!! :(
- You've never done any drugs. That's weird.
- Shoo :{
- You're a weird thing to bring to a picnic.
- It's fun to reorganize!
- Some guy felt the need to tell me i've got beautiful dyes.Like i don' know that. I See thdn ddveryday.
- Wwwedagi
- Ur fat and u have body odor.
- I Smell bad cause of sweating so much from nerves.
- I got a chai and it tasted like perfume. But in a good way.
- I think I just saw an amish. Or a jew bbq-ing.
- The local news people have grandpa accents. It's funny.
- OMG THUNDER AND LIGHTENING! SO MUCH RAIN AND WIND!!! I HAVE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THIS!
- Dude i am in the weirdest, grossest smelling crap theatre ever. There are a lot of retarded people working here.
- It's that belly button goo smell.
- Screw KEENAN i'm changing it to NEWTON.
- I want to smack him away and scream, STEP OFF MAN, STEP OFF!
- I pee a lot
- Drew barrymore and ellen page are so in love with each other. I think they are lesbians.
- Omg! I did not know! Corndog! Cool.
- They have too much meat.
- I'm slow.
- Yes. I wish I could eat butter cookies all day. [This was in response to my inquiry as to whether the Seth Rogen blob in Monsters Vs. Aliens sounded like Seth Rogen when the movie was in Spanish.]
- There is a story in the news "woman eats ex's goldfish after spat."
- Barfy barfy
- I'm wearing my FOOSEY shorts
- Omg it is painful how stupid people are!
- Woot woot! Dans gone!
- I got a B+ on my anoexic paper.
- Ohhh, there's chocolate on my neck.
- Ohh! Now there's chocolate on my arm!
- ohhhhh, the chocolate got in my shirt.
- Poop strong, and carry on!
- I like the way I smell
- Mommi threw up last night from eating too much cheese.
- Hello, my name is Sigi and I am a peanut butter and chocolate addict.
- Wye cuffededfe
- Crap chocolate is good!
- Oh my. Sorry. I think my belly was doing the dialing.
- Alan and I have a date for a McRib.
- Paula Deen had a brutal encounter with an airborne piece of pork at a charity event.
- Hello my baby.
- Just don't look like David Bowie
- House exposed his true feeling for Cuddy and was turned down :(
- OMG PEN CLICKERS!
- Neat what machines can do.
- shoes, omg shoes. i miss that.
- They give each cubicle their own tissue box :)
- Someone wrote in a complaint that something was growing "mode".
- just got a complaint where the customer says the chicken tastes like a "spongy toxic tampon". Awesome.
- one customer's quote regarding our asparagus spears was "it sucked!"
- And don't worry about looking stupid when trying new things. Stupid looking mainlanders are what keep that state afloat. Get it...afloat, cause it's an island.
- it is here too. Maui isn't so great. [when told that there was perfect weather in Maui.]
- omg, that's yerroble!
- they made jamie cry?! NO FAT PEOPLE MAKE JAMIE CRY!!! I HURT THEM WITH VEGGIES!!!!!
- Did you know that in 1981, ketchup was considered to be a vegetable in the school lunch program?!!!!
- We should play catch!
- Catch is fun.
- you would not believe the darth vader breathing girl i have sitting in back of me in class. I have to hold in the laughter when the class gets silent and she is sooooo loud.
- she just littered! on campus! There's like 50 billion trash cans!!!
- You know, if I was God, I would have made two Earths and seen which of the two would have progressed fastest. That would be interesting.
- Clapping's fun!
- rocket surgery!! hahahahahaha!!!
- I would like to meet your cat.
- Listening to guys talk about sports is embarrassing
- My carrots taste like carrots
- I think I just ate paint
- Boy you missed some amazing projectile vomit from Pegi last night. It was like The Exorcist.
- Boy, God must've had a good day when he made the peach.
- I am nowhere in Google. That practically means I don't exist.
- I put Sigi Keenan in and a link for the stupid things I say on your listography came up.
- Inception is super duper awesome!
- I love my FANTA grape chapstick!!!!
- I wonder if the creator of Flight of the Navigator got the idea from sitting in the dentist chair. You know, cause of the big light that is attached to the ceiling they use to look inside your mouth.
- I think it's spot on! [in response to my asking if a haiku I had written was any good.]
- Heart burn is a killer!
- Someone has BO so bad it made me cough.
- I just put the pickles in a ham sandwich and it was AMAZING!!!
- Erons, chores, things to do. I speel it wrong.
- OH BOY I LOVE CEREAL!!!
- My head is very heavy today.
- Stairs make me confused.
- When you walk up them and look at them at the same time, it doesn't make things move around for you?
- Chemistry lab is fun!
- You know, when I talk to myself in my head it's the voice of James Herriot the vet.
- A Scientology commercial just told me I'm not mortal.
- I like ankle socks. You know, cause they're more airy.
- Shoot, I want some lamb bacon
- I draw the line at Spam.
- I am reading list of stupid things I say (which is stupidly long (that's what she said)) and it cracked me up, but when did I say I think I ate paint?
- Love is a battlefield.
- Gongos doesn't sound very established.
- I just an insane amount of cheerios and I think it was too much.
- I'm reading a complaint from someone whose name is Nissan. Ha!
- That ass is insane!
- You know that girl who had acid thrown on her face? She did it to herself. What an a-hole.
- Sadist? You mean he worshiped the devil?
- I think the same thing when I see it at the warehouse. HOLLA! [about the challah bread at Trader Joe's]
- Animals should so wear little clothes.
- I like anatomically correct hearts with blood.
- YES! I AM APPAULED!
- I forgot to tell you, I have a customer named Helen Keller. hahahahahaha!
- I may eat this phone
- Maybe my unconscious wanted to get you new pants.
- I wish there was a warning on texts before you read them that says "finish eating or drinking before reading text". I almost choked on my grapefruit after reading that.
- May the 4th be with you.
- pee!
- Youvgonna bw heee at 9am?
- I can't find eatplugs.
- ALL RIGHT LITTLE BIRDIE!!!
- Oh, is this the airplane place? [near the Santa Monica Airport]
- The trash ate them. Liked 'em real good.
- a crown BLING BLING!
- like pooing coffee
- Drag is fun
- I forgot my nut packs at grandpas!! Don't eat my nuts please.
nov 14 2008 ∞
mar 23 2012 +
mar 23 2012 +