• nothing abt me in the email - not funny, interesting, skilled - just how i served him a friend
• reconn w stevan - does he disconsider stevan so much to the extent of not understanding i wont judge stevan through holdens actions - i know he cheats n always reshapes their relationship boundaries, but do u consider him so spineless like he cannot make his own decisions lmao.

also why do I have contact stevanb, why do i have to grovel and reach out - why cant stevan write me

i reached out until this year at the end of April - lets bike during work hours lmao. stevan came over for dinner n lunch and i was NEVER invited anywhere. i always gave them stuff like food and bought them spatulas and they never ever gave me anything

• lack of effort in finding words 2 express himself Whatever sth
• i would love 2 be friends, but in the sense that i wld love it if this never happened and i was still oblivious of how they see me
• n i did confront him abt this last may if i did syh wrong and they said no, and they gaslit me

and it was extra scary cuz i see what they did to sasi, and i was literally a step behind sasi.

it feels good that he finally admits he dumped me, but it didn't start with june, it started with when we moved away. actlly before we moved away.

• he was in a bad place - living, emotionally, n i opened my home to him and he shut the door in front of me.

i was always so supportive of them and omg of them moving out and living as a couple which stevan had never done b4. i always cheered them on so much and they never cheered me on in ANYTHING

• what i want is that he does not think of me and that he moves away so i don't have to think abt him either

instead pf feeling rejection n humiliation every time i enter or leave my home

• i cant blame him for not loving me but i can blam ehim for humiliating me
• 1st of all - it all started in December not in june. in june it was my sister, not ME who told them i cried cuz they 4got abt my bday. how did i guilt trip? how can he get angry when i say he hurt my feelings? that is narcissistic!
• he was my only link2 groun of friend after dleting all social media - n he never invited me or told me abt anything - and he KNEW he cut me off from them all and he still did it
• i also think its the 1.5 eur that embarrassed him

he got angry w the 2guilt tripping aka me expressing my feelings of hurt so he decided to humiliate me. that's disgusting

he left me friendless n that was intentional

he just wants 2 b absolved of guild while he did not even try to find the words to write this. this is all abt how ie been an accessory a help to him, not a friend, this does not see me past himself. does he think i end where our interaction ends. thanks for the love and the meals that is all i was. i am nothing past his own utility. he just wrote this to redeem himself in front of his own eyes, this would not stand in front of a jury

there is nothing redeeming in this letter

and also there is nothing abt him asking for my friendship again. just giving his consent that i talk to stevan

he blew up my tire n he was like its gonna b 3k, it was 30 and he did not offer to pay even when it was 3k. n he said lemme know when you get it bk i will come w u. n i did tell him and as always he made an excuse. like bitch why did u tell me to tell u then.

and the lets bike during working hours

or he just wants to go on another summer tour de force of cheating on stevan n he wants me to pick up stevan when he is heartbroken again

hope u have friends who love u - i don't but id rather be alone than disappointed.#

idk wanna write him anything telling him suttf cuz i don wanna have this benefit him. if i tell him how he hurt me its still me doing emotional labour for him.

i thought abt u i wonder if u though abt me too omg the audacity as if i thought abt him w anything other than anger confusion and hurt as if i sat there and reminisced happily about our friendship i think i was his friend but he was never my friend

fuck off don't think about me