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  • Season 2
    • No reason? It was the 05/05/05 party, it happens once every billion years. -michael
    • Finally, I want to thank God, because God gave me this Dundee and I feel God in this Chili's tonight. -pam
    • No, 'cause the ice melts and then it's like... second drink! -pam
    • Wow that is really hard. You really think you can go all day long? Well, you always left me satisfied and smiling. Mmmm... THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID! -jim & michael
    • Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Studebaker, Television, North Korea, South Korea, Marylin Monroe! Ryan started the fire! -dwight
    • I did not go to business school. You know who else didn't go to business school? LeBron James, Tracy McGrady, Kobe Bryant. They went right from high school to the NBA so... So, it's not the same thing at all. -michael
    • Michael and I have a very special connection... like an umbilical cord. -dwight
    • No not me. Not Dwight. Tell him NOT DWIGHT. TELL HIM TO STOP. QUIET YOU! MAKE HIM BE QUIET! -dwight
    • Let's gangbang this thing and go home. Good? -michael
    • Here's what we think happened: Michael's sidekick, who all through the movie is this complete idiot who's causing the downfall of the United States, was originally named Dwight. But then Michael changed it to Samuel L. Chang using a search and replace, but that doesn't work on misspelled words, leaving behind one Dwigt. And Dwight figured it out. Oops. -pam
    • Today is Thursday, and Dwight thinks it's Friday, and that's what I'll be working on this afternoon. -jim
    • I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon- sue me- and since I don''t have a butler, I have to do it myself. So most nights before I go to bed I will lay six strips of bacon out on my George Foreman Grill. Then I go to sleep. When I wake up, I plug in the grill. I go back to sleep again. Then I wake up to the smell of crackling bacon. It is delicious. It''s good for me. It's the perfect way to start the day. Today I got up, I stepped onto the grill and it clamped down on my foot. That''s it. I don't see what's so hard to believe about that. -michael
    • Get Ryan! He need's to lift me, and he needs to clean me up a little bit... Bring a wet towel...Ryan is... dead. -michael & toby
    • You can't fire me; I don't work in this van! -dwight
    • I am a victim of a hate crime. I think Stanley knows what I''m talking about. That's not what a hate crime is. Well I hated it! A lot! -michael & stanley
    • Pizza. Great equalizer. Rich people love pizza, poor people love pizza, white people love pizza, black people love pizza... do black people like pizza? -michael
    • What it's like to walk a mile in Oscar's shoes, or try on Phyllis' pants... -michael
    • You look cute today, Dwight. Thanks, girl. -jim & dwight
    • This is humongous, I am not a security threat. And my middle name is Kurt, not Fart. - dwight
    • I hate so much about the things that you choose to be. -michael to toby
may 23 2009 ∞
may 23 2009 +