Forget my shoulder when you're in need. Forgetting birthdays is guaranteed. And should I love you, you would be the last to know. I won't send roses, and roses suit you so.
I need a moment 'cause I've dragged myself to thin, we all need a moment in our lives. Works hard, the days too long, and that's just where it begins, tension has had us all this time.
I see a red door and I want it painted black. No colors anymore I want them to turn black. I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes, I have to turn my head until my darkness goes.
With the lights out it's never less dangerous, even with a stranger, never gets painless, don't be afraid. Every time I think I'm gonna change it, it's driving me insane. Do you live, do you die, do you bleed, for the fantasy? In your mind, through your eyes, do you see, it's the fantasy?
I am what I am, I don't want praise I don't want pity. I bang my own drum, some think it's noise I think it's pretty. And so what if I love each sparkle and each bangle, why not see things from a different angle? Your life is a sham, till you can shout out I am what I am. I deal my own deck, sometimes the aces sometimes the deuces, it's one life and there's no return and no deposit, one life so it's time to open up your closet. Life's not worth a dam till you can shout out I am what I am.
I'm becoming less defined as days go by, fading away. And well you might say I'm losing focus, kinda drifting into the abstract in terms of how I see myself. Sometimes I think I can see right through myself, sometimes I can see right through myself. Less concerned about fitting into the world (your world that is), 'cause it doesn't really matter anymore, none of this matters anymore. Yes I am alone but then again I always was as far back as I can tell. I think maybe it's because you were never really real to begin with. I just made you up to hurt myself.
All around me are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces. Bright and early forthe daily races, going nowhere, going nowhere. And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad, the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had. I find it hardto tell you, I find it hard to take, wen people run in circles it's a very, very mad world. Went to school and I was very nervous. No one knew me, no one knew me. Hello teacher tell me, what's my lesson? Look right through me.
I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel. I focus on the pain, the only thing that's real. The needle tears a hole, the old familiar sting. Try to kill it all away, but I remember everything. What have I become, my sweetest friend? Everyone I knows goes away in the end. And you could haveit all, my empire of dirty. I will let you down and I will make you hurt. I wear this crown of thorns upon my liar's chair, full of broken thoughts I can not repair. Beneath the stains of time the feelings disappear. You are someone else, I am still right here.
When you were here before, couldn't look you in the eye, you're just like an angel, your skin makes me cry. You float like a feather in a beautiful world, I wish I was special, you're so fuckin' special. But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo, what the hell am I doin' here? I don't belong here. I don't care if it hurts, I wanna have control, I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul. I want you to notice when I'm not around, you're so fuckin' special, I wish I was special.
25 years of my life and still I'm trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination. I realised quickly when I knew I should that the world was made for this Brotherhood of man - for whatever that means. And so I cry sometimes when I'm lying in bed just to get it all out what's in my head, and I, I'm feeling a little peculiar. And so I wake in the morning and I step outside, I take deep breath and I get real high and I scream from the top of my lungs - what's goin' on? And I try, oh my God do I try, I try all the time in this institution. And I pray, oh my God do I pray, I pray every single day - for a revolution.
When the day is long and the night, the night is yours alone, when you're sure you've had enough of this life, well hang on. Don't let yourself go, 'cause everybody cries, and everybody hurts sometimes.
People say I'm the life of the party because I tell a joke or two. Although I might be laughing loud and hearty deep inside I'm blue. So take a good look at my face, you'll see my smile looks out of place, if you look closer, it's easy to trace the tracks of my tears.
Do I attract you? Do I repulse you with my queasy smile? Am I too dirty? Am I too flirty? Do I like what you like? I could be wholesome, I could be loathsome, I guess I'm a little bit shy! Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me without making me try? I could be hurtful, I could be purple, I could be anything you like! Gotta be green, gotta be mean, gotta be everything more! Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me? Why don't you walk out the door!
Teenage dreams in a teenage circus, running around like a clown on purpose. Who gives a damn about the family you come from? No giving up when you're young and you want some. Waking up in the midday sun - what's to live for? You could see what I've done, staring at emotion in the light of day. I was running from the things that you'd say.
Open a new window, open a new door, travel a new highway, that's never been tried before; before you find you're a dull fellow, punching the same clock, walking the same tight rope as everyone on the block. The fellow you ought to be is three dimensional, soaking up life down to your toes, whenever they say you're slightly unconventional, just put your thumb up to your nose. And show 'em how to dance to a new rhythm, whistle a new song, toast with a new vintage, the fizz doesn't fizz too long. There's only one way to make the bubbles stay, simply travel a new high way, dance to a new rhythm, open a new window every day.
On nights like this when the world's a bit amiss and the lights go down across the trailer park. I get down, I feel had, I feel on the verge of going mad - and then it's time to punch the clock. I put on some make-up and turn up the tape deck and pull the wig down on my head - suddenly I'm Miss Midwest Midnight Checkout Queen until I head home and put myself to bed. I look back on where I'm from, look at the woman I've become, and the strangest things seem suddenly routine. I look up from my Vermouth on the rocks, a gift-wrapped wig still in the box of towering velveteen.
Once again I'm a little depressed by the tired old face that I see, once again it is time to be someone, who's anyone other than me. With the rare combination of girlish excitement and manly restraint, I position my precious assortment of pencils and powders and paint. So whenever I feel that my place in the world is beginning to crash, I apply one great stroke of mascara to my rather limp upper lash. And I can cope again, good God! There's hope again! When life is a real bitch again, and my old sense of humor has up, and gone, it's time for the big switch again, I put a little more mascara on. When I count my crow's feet again, and tired of this perpetual marathon, I put down the john-seat again, and put a little more mascara on. And everything's sparkle dust, bugle beads, ostrich plums, when it's a beaded lash that you look through, 'cause when I feel glamorous, elegant, beautiful, the world that I'm looking at's beautiful too. When my little road has a few bumps again, and I need something level to lean upon, I put on my sling pumps again, and wham! This ugly duckling is a swan.