An original: There's a very old run-down house that needs renovating, and the construction worker asks his boss how well he wants the ceiling and walls knocked down.

"ASBESTOS you can!"

What do you call a mushroom who walks into a bar and buys everyone a drink? A FUNGI.

What do you call a DJ who is skilled on decks. Deckstrous

hmmm...don't be a comedian Helen.