• She waited there. In the night, while the world was wild and beautiful, she waited. She faded behind the veil and wanted to become part of the darkness, hidden; an owl maybe, or more probably a bat. Waiting requires patience, and she wasn’t patient, so she had already destroyed everything around her, so there was nothing to do but cry. Waiting and wandering and wailing, for something she didn’t deserve. But no one deserves anything. Everything is useless. But there, in the distance. The darkness was changing and moving and going backwards, and time caught up with her, and she sighed like she was falling off the edge of the world, which she was really.

And it was his fault, because she need not have waited, not really. Because he had been there all along behind the veil, his own veil, which he refused so hard to p...

• Seven Types of Ambiguity, Elliot Perlman
• Nausea, Jean-Paul Sartre, James Wood, Robert Baldick
• Dark Water, Georgia Blain
• The Virgin Suicides, Jeffrey Eugenides
• The Pleasures of the Damned, Charles Bukowski
• The Bed I Made, Lucie Whitehouse
• The Weight of Silence, Heather Gudenkauf
• Rebecca, Daphne Du Maurier
• Catch 22, Joseph Heller
• Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
• Birdsong, Sebastian Faulks
• Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
• Atonement, Ian McEwan
• One Day In The Life Of Ivan Denisovich, Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
• Girl, Interrupted, Susanna Keysen

• you find my love under the dense rind but it's always easiest to peel when it's so thick.
• feelings feelings feelings
• slam all your thoughts into the front part of your brain under the bangs, behind the eyeballs, where the magnetism of your ideas to the rest of the world will eventually pull the gray matter right through your fucking skull
• things i have loved, i'm allowed to keep
• if you were to leave and fulfill someone else's dreams, I think I might totally be lost.
• "what's the opposite of a bruise? - luv"
• I did this thing where I would write something but just as quickly erase it. Half attempted charm, half amazement at a situation. All I wanted to know really is what color your eyes are.
• you've always been right, I never liked i...

• Into The Wild, Jon Krakauer
• Jane Eyre, Charlotte Bronte
• The Historian, Elizabeth Kostova
• His Illegal Self, Peter Carey
• Getting Rid Of Matthew, Jane Fallon
• The Crucifix Killer, Chris Carter
• The Time Traveler's Wife, Audrey Niffenegger
• Between, Georgia, Joshilyn Jackson
• Lord of the Flies, William Golding
• Champage Babes, Amanda Brunker
• Private Peaceful, Michael Morpurgo
• About A Boy, Nick Hornby
• Newes From The Dead, Mary Hooper
• Genesis, Karin Slaughter
• The Bell Jar, Sylvia Plath
• Catcher In The Rye, JD Salinger

• drink a lot of water
• read more
• exercise
• eat healthily
• question everything

• "Why do you look so sad? Because you speak to me in words and I look at you with feelings." - Pierrot Le Fou
• “The tale begins with the shattering of a magical mirror, its pieces spreading over the world. When a shard enters a person’s eye, they only see the negative aspects of things. When it enters someone’s heart, it turns to ice. The symptoms of depression are eerily similar, including irritability, negative thoughts and perhaps even worse, numbness.”
• "Human relationships didn’t work anyhow. Only the first two weeks had any zing, then the participants lost their interest. Masks dropped away and real people began to appear: cranks, imbeciles, the demented, the vengeful, sadists, killers. Modern society had created its own kind and they feasted on each other. It was a duel to the death—in a cesspool." -Charles B...