• Today, my girlfriend dumped me for someone else. An hour earlier I had just gotten permission from her dad to propose.
  • Today, I went on a walk with the guy I like. He held my hand, so I decided to tell him that I had feelings for him. He said that he had feelings for me too. I smiled and leaned in to kiss him. He put his hand on my face and pushed it away, and said "until your acne clears, we are NOT together."
  • Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth."
  • Today, I passed by a small shop and decided to go in to look at the jeans. Before I could even step in, the shop owner told me expressionlessly, "All the sizes here are too small for you".
  • Today, for my two-year anniversary I got my girlfriend a very expensive diamond necklace. She got me male enhancement pills.
mar 10 2009 ∞
mar 11 2009 +