i am the type of person that likes to play favorites. i always want everyone to feel slightly uncomfortable in my presence and feel as if they have to impress me. this list includes reasons why allison is my favorite and sarah is not. allison: #1 friend

• over 5' tall
• went to grad school
• loves animals
• stood up in my wedding
• has a turtle
• talks about owning a home
• has four first names
• teaches people
• has two seatbelt bags
• made me make this list

sarah: #8 friend

• under 5' tall
• going to grad school
• eats animals
• didn't show up to my wedding
• does not have a turtle
• owns a home
• has two first names
• teaches dogs
• has zero seatbelt bags
• might believe this list