• White or red wine?

Neither, wine is gross.

• Who was the last person you hugged?

Bean!

• Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?

My sixth grade teacher, Mrs. Connell.

• Where did your first kiss take place?

In the F wing by my locker, Freshman year across from the bathrooms.

• Do you prefer foxes or wolves?

Foxes, a wolf would eat my ass alive if I pissed it off but I could probably fend off a fox.

• What is your shoesize?

9, 10 on a good day.

• Do you prefer fruit or vegetables?

Either or, I'm a pretty healthy dude.

• Have you ever kissed a member of the same sex?

Yes, on accident in Alaska, I once kissed my best friend John Michael Clagg, we ran into each other whilst playing tag or hide and seek or something.

• Would you rather never fall in love again or never orgasm again?

Never fall in love again, of course! I won't ever need to. :)

• What does your outfit consist of today?

Whatever I feel like.

• What are your bust-waist-hip measurements?

Don't know, don't care, don't even think it matters for a guy.

• Are you a hypocrite?

I try not to be.

• Why did you last cry?

Don't remember.

• What are your favourite smells?

Gasoline, lilacs, a fresh book and a fresh deck of cards.

• What are your favourite textures?

Squishy things, rubbery toys, beancheeks, fingernails, sharp corners.

• Fur or feathers?

Fur, all the way. Feathers are gross.

• Tartan or tweed?

Tweed, it's better looking than tartan, and sounds neat.

• Leopard print or neon?

Neon, leopard print is more for fat 40 year old mothers experiencing a mid-life crisis.

• Any beauty tips?

Not exactly?

• (Send me a fuck marry kill)

I've already done way too many of these to think of a new one.

• If you won a LOT of money the lottery and decided to move, where would you move to?

Iceland, Reykjavik to be precise.

• Alcoholic beverage of choice?

Mike's Hard Lemonade.

• What is more attractive: Nice hands or nice feet?

Nice hands, all feet are universally gross.

• What’s the youngest you would consider dating?

My own age.

• If you were around in the sixties would you be a mod or a rocker?

I don't know what either of those things are referring to, and I'd be a hippie anyway.

• Are thongs sexy?

Yes, very.

• Did you grow up in a healthy environment?

I did, I'm the person I am today because of it.

• What do you think of when I say “the twenties”?

Fucking awesome Gatsby madness and flappers with risqué clothing that really isn't that risqué anymore.

• Could you ever deliver a baby?

NO.

• Is penetration important to you?

Well if I'm trying to make babies then DUH.

• What did your last text read?

"Yes" From Anna Cutaia.

• Can you ride a bicycle?

Yup.

• What sport were you best at in high school?

Frisbee I guess, or flag football.

• Who do you miss right now?

My baby.

• What was the last alcoholic beverage you consumed?

I don't remember, probably rum mixed with egg nog for Christmas.

• Paris, London and New York… which one would you live in, which would you visit for a day, which would you visit for a fortnight?

Firstly, who in the hell still uses the term "fortnight?" Secondly, I would visit New York for a day, live in Paris and visit London for two weeks.

• What is your sexuality?

Straight, yo.

• Heavy rain or heatwave?

Probably heavy rain.

• Chicken or fish?

Fish.

• Do you think suits are sexy?

I DO. I'VE ALWAYS WANTED ONE.