╾ 27th

i'm afraid i wont be able to listen to shinee ever again. i keep wanting to and i even downloaded the new japanese album but i just... cant. i have this playlist called "kpop party" with musics that makes me go !!!!!! and theres view... and it came on. i listened till the chorus but i couldnt. i had to change the music. my heart still cant bear it.

i cant just listen to your voice in shinee and be joyful. i think about you and i think about the boys and how shinee will never be the same. i think about how much i wish i could support them and listen to them and just listen to shinee the way i did before but it seems impossible now.

i hear your voice and it hurts because shinee songs will never have your voice in it again. its gonna be the four of them from now on. thats it. without you. and its not because you decided to go and live your life outside the spotlights. its not because you didnt wanted to renew your contract. its because you're no longer here with us.

i wanna be strong enough to listen to shinee again not only because i love their music but because you loved shinee so much and its so unfair of me to just "let go". i hope someday i'll get better even if just to go back and listen to shinee. its also a part of you i cant just ignore.