╾ 22nd

today, till now, i almost cried two times. its hard. i miss you.

when i woke up i saw your album, the track list, the artwork... i dont know how i feel. i'm a little excited, i wanna hear the songs, i wanna buy the album and see all the pictures. but i know it will break me to pieces. i'm already so broken... its gonna be hard. its already hard.

just now i was going to eat with a friend of mine, and she was talking about her mother that passed away. its been 7 months, if i remember well, and she she's just now accepting and coping with it. 7 months. she said she went home from work crying so much, she was crying all the way back to her house. i could relate so much, it was the same with me.

but she said that when she got back home she had to stop crying because her father was there and she had to be strong for him. the thing is: i have no one. there's just nothing holding me, i dont have to be strong for anybody because literally no one depends on me, people barely notice me or miss me or remember me.