6/5

• Terrible way to wake up to the feeling of worthlessness. How do I deserve the love of so many when I have nothing to give? I wish something happen to me. Today is going to be terrible.
• Today is not that terrible I guess. Being needed by my friend fills some kind of hole in my heart. I think it's sickening but somewhat fulfilling at the same time. I hate how I need others so badly.

6/4

• Sometimes, I feel like I am supposed to be an artist of sorts. I have so many ideas in mind. Music, images, words, stories, even movies.
• love and nothing else.
• I was happy for a while today. But then something always come up and stop me. I realized today that people don't really like me with joy. Maybe because my happiness can make me mindless, careless and plain stupid and annoying. And I have a terrible smile. I look better without it. I hate my face and my body so much. That's why I don't like profile picture with my actual face. I can't stand looking at myself. I thought smile is the best make up. But apparently not for me. So much sadness right now... I hope my sadness can at least make other people feel better about themselves... just the way they like it.
• I am a lonely soul. My only social life is on the internet. That is why I am on here all the time. By myself most of the time as well.
• Being depressed after being happy is the worst. I fall harder.
• I don't even want to bother any more.

6/3

• Be true to yourself and to others, so even in the worst time, you know that you've done what you wanted.
• Loneliness is devastating without pudding. Glad my other remedy gave me a pad on the back today.
• I cried so hard watching the Notebook...

6/2

• In the past year, being alone has given me a lot of thoughts, ideas, madness, emotional crisis, pain. At this temporary moment of clarity, my logical mind has made peace with my wild heart and gave me the right kind of doubts, the kind that points a direction... instead of the usual spinning compass. Though it may be the wrong direction, it may at least cut lose some lose ends... if I am strong enough to do this.
• Writing is a struggle against silence. - Carlos Fuentes
• I am always eating alone. And it seems that I can't go to nice restaurants to eat alone. I can't enjoy food as I tend to finish the food as efficiently as possible, almost like I want to get away from the crowd. Average meal time is less than 15 min.
• My sane mind of logic wages war against my wild heart of hearts. Both are lost! Both are lost!