9/25

• This week: Walking around Boston, taking random pictures of everything I see.
• Today: Really warm outside in the morning. Had lunch with Jessica. A bit rush but really nice. Going to do breakfast next Friday. Ashley will join too.
• Tomorrow: Walk even further, take even more pictures. Maybe cross the bridge.
• Emotions: Chillex hangout with Ama, calming. Miss Celicia a lot. Still confused about McKenzie. Want to but not sure if I should - text anyone. I still can't figure out where my place is. Tired. I feel like I am losing myself. It's getting colder.
• Random: 1. Boston is really Chinese. Way too many Chinese stuff. 2. I should exercise. Back and shoulder problems coming back.

9/26

• Today: Walked for about three hours. Somehow felt very weak and an indescribable pain. Almost fainted on the side walk. Walked back to apartment to rest. Texted McKenzie, just wish her having a fantastic week. Fixed Ama's lamp. Ama cooked dinner - phenomenal African curry.
• Heart: Feel empty.
• Random: 1. Boston has really interesting architectures. 2. Don't feel very healthy lately. 3. Can't focus on writing, so just read... 4. I can't quite gather my thoughts lately.
• End of Day: Watched "500 Days of Summer" with Ama. She passed out. But I felt emotional and saw a lot of things that I didn't see the first time... I think I am going to watch it again tomorrow. Realized a lot of things...

9/27

• Today: just chilled at Ama's place. Read and write. Talked to her classmate Ashley - really nice person.
• Ama's taking me to a party later. I really am not in the mood, but I will try my best.
• Emotions: finally able to write it down. write down the madness. hopefully, i will be fine at some point. And be a better person at some point... I wonder why I can't talk it out with her... I really don't know what i should do if this doesn't work out. I feel myself going insane on the inside.
• Random: 1. 30 seconds advertisement for a 32 second Youtube video, seriously??

9/28

• Last night: The party was alright (American college style). But I couldn't enjoy it much - either I just don't know how to party or I just wasn't in the mood.
• Today: Wake up at noon feeling tired and frustrated. McKenzie leaves today.

Forgive, forget, appreciate what I have. "Life's too short to even care at all."

• Ama brought me to another party. An African party... felt a bit awkward because I couldn't enjoy the music choice - too "aggressive" for my taste (do not like songs about "booty" or fucking women; hate "twirks" as well - too much! in my face! NO!).
• I think that was the last party this week and for a while. I might be too old for this kind of party. I know I am tired and simply not in the mood so stressing out quite a lot.

9/29

• walked around, read, trance music, figured things out, and changing.
• I can't quite shake off this weight on my heart.
• I can't believe how anxious I am right now... simple wait for reply becomes the wait for the end of me.