- 1/1: regret getting text+... unstable internet phone has left me wondering too much. I feel a bit depressed as it doesn't help me stay in touch or get closer with people. Or perhaps, it's just me. ; 1986 has the exact same calendar as 2014!
- 1/3: sorting relationship with people in my head.
- 1/4: had the most wonderful dream. didn't want to get up so I could stay in it. kiss on the cheek is just so sweet. Always a dream though.
- 1/5: weird dreams of fighting monsters and mazes.
- 1/6: sick again and feeling weak. ; missing
- 1/9: went to see two movies with mom. One of which only had three other people.
- 1/10: it is just so warm and cozy in my bed. And I just want to keep on dreaming that sweet dream. ; went to the university library nearby. For no reason I was very touched by the books. I think that is where I will get away.
- 1/11: a bit sad that I now feel anxious and even a bit disturbed when touched by people - anyone. I have no idea why. I wonder if it will happen with c... ; I have no friend; today was just so depressing.
- 1/12: still not used to the year 2014. ; this is the year.
- 1/13: simple joy to hear from her.
- 1/16: I am so friggin hungry but I can't eat.
- 1/18: time flies as I waste my life away. I haven't talked to anyone for a long time now. ; I miss her in my life. I wish she would speak to me...
- 1/19: breakfast with mom ; I have to be better...
- 1/21: motivation is key.
- 1/22: Young the Giant's new album - Mind Over Matter
- 1/24: dan it, sick again. thought exercise regularly improves immune system.
- 1/28: i miss her so much it's insane. ; I wish I can be worthy. ; faith. I am having some philosophical and religious crisis. Love is giving me a hard time in every category. ; Loving someone more than anything is the most impossible quest that we uncontrollably go on, and we march on with pleasure and faith into the unknown. ; funny I only have strangers to share with my deepest thoughts... like the bottom of the glass evaporate leaving only a stain proving the existence of a being.
- 1/29: I am a sucker for love story, especially among my friends. Perhaps it's because mine is so far a series of unresolved... I enjoy others' happiness.
- 1/31: Perhaps my frequency is just the same as kids, I get along with them so well so fast... ; it crossed my mind today that if this love doesn't end well, I don't ever want to love another person like this again. I don't know if I can either.
jan 1 2014 ∞
feb 21 2014 +