- pulling over, the biker took off his helmet and bowed his head as the 30 car funeral recession slowly passed.
- i told my daughter her smile could stop wars, but she decided to test the theory.
- i once believed that not only color television, but color itself, was invented in the late 1950s.
- you're just the skinny-jeans-guy in my sci fi class i idolized last summer and i'm just the too-loud girl you've forgotten, but i still hold my pencils the way you do.
- the screwdriver shaped hole in my arm is a prime example of my experience with home renovations.
- i realized today that when my aunt sends emails to the family, she puts my address as a "bcc" so my dad doesn't figure out my email and try to contact me that way too.
- it's amazing how fast you can run when something's on fire.
- our first kiss seemed to have perfect timing, immediately after her accidental elbow to my forehead.
- for his birthday i gave him a jenga set where every time you pulled out a block, it had a memory, inside joke, or quote on it.
- resting lazily in the grass, our fingers touched for the first time.
- the best conversation i've had in six months is when the girl i love and i copy-and-pasted one sentences to each other through aim.
- i found out the hard way that cucumbers are flammable.
- as you were breaking up with me, all i could think about were those mornings when you compared the pop-tarts and gave me the one with more frosting.
- after calculating that i wasted 6500 hours in church the first 25 years of my life, i vowed to spend 6500 hours doing volunteer work that would actually make a difference in the world.
- i know 18 digits of pi and can recite the quadratic equation, but i still need to make an L with my hand to find out where left is.
- i waited for him to hit me, instead he replied, "she'll probably cheat on you too."
- not many people would have required stitches after washing the dishes, but then again i've always thought of myself as special.
- seventeen years later, i fell in love with the man who, when he was twenty and i was five, would let me come to his apartment to play super mario brothers while my parents grocery-shopped.
- losing my virginity to a regrettable british accent wasn't on the syllabus.
- he wrote eight drafts of "will you go to prom with me?" and i couldn't help but say yes.
- actually, i do know where that new dent in your car came from.
- i really wish my new office mate could tell a story in one sentence.
- we would spend hours "painting" her weathered, old fence with water, pretending that we were using the whitest paint around.
- my brother ambled into the room, sipping his drink, and said thoughtfully: "you know, i wish there was something like iced tea... but warm."
- for future reference, "just friends" don't feel each other up on the living room floor.
- after meticulously explaining the birds and the bees my little boy looked at his sister and asked me, "you had sex twice?"
- as i stared at his bare chest i had this uncanny desire to bite his nipples.
- two days later, i realized that he might have been flirting with me after all.
- i was out of prison for nearly a week before i stopped waiting for other people to open doors for me.
- sometimes after i dropped her off at her house i would come back and the bed would still be warm from us.
- as much as i like being one of the dudes, i would give anything for one of them to tell me i was pretty.
- i had a crush on him because he was good at physics, and for no other reason.
- ever notice how a specific type of person never turns you on until you have a crush on that specific type of person?
- we'd been best friends for over 18 years, and then he kissed me.
- reading through last year's journal, i see the words i can't even remember thinking.
- my brother bet me $5 that you and i would grow old together, and two days later when you broke up with me i bought five boxes of the most bittersweet twinkies i have ever eaten in my life.
- i had five years to tell her i loved her, but i could only do it once i lived 300 miles away.
- i made a list and crossed out all the subjects that i knew right away i didn't want to major in, and in the end all that was left was neuroscience, so i went with that.
- sometimes when i get really mad i imagine myself yelling at countries, saying things like "switzerland, you jerk!"
- very few entrepreneurs can say they were conceived on a hot air balloon ride, and also share a direct lineage to both edgar allen poe and thomas alva edison... myself included.
- after six shots, three beers, and some very sloppy flirting, apparently i had my first kiss.
- when i was standing on the subway platform telling the particle physics joke to my roommate, i fell in love with the stranger that jumped in with the punchline.
- on average, i deliberately set a person's hair on fire every twelve years or so.
nov 16 2009 ∞
may 22 2010 +
may 22 2010 +