Sam is probably the only person who can relate to this list.

Sisky:

• "Do you have nipple rings?!"
• "I've known you since I was 13! I'm just a little man! What am I gonna do now?!"
• "You have been FOLLLOOOOWWED! You have been FOLLLOOOOWWED!"
• "I think this is the quickest I've ever eaten an apple."
• "They're going to say they like the dead ferret on my head much better, that I'm a sell out."
• "I just wanted to say thanks again to the guy in Minneapolis who told me I was ugly, opened my eyes to the world."
• "I'm just salty. We could've gone home. I could've had a nice dinner, hung out with my cat. I could've been loving my night and instead I'm sitting in a parking lot, surrounded by a bunch of... imbeciles."
• "The 'T' in Adam T. Siska stands for Thadeus."
• "So let me give you an update here. It's me, Sisky Business and I'm out on the lake, me and Jack came here. Everything was going great and now we've looked in and my car is.. gone. What the hell happened?"
• "68 cents. Cold hard cash."
• "*To: Sisky, from: Santa!* AWESOME!"
• "PILLS! Oh, no... Magic Grow Sea Animals and Safari Animals! *THEY GROW!* YEAAAHHHHHH! *YEAH THANK YOU SANTA!*"

The Butcher:

• "Ask me where we are. *Hey, where are we?* We're in Paris. Arc de triumph."
• "Bruno, you got the body of boxer, baby!"
• "BIIILLL! Getcher dawg! Bill, yer dawg's gonna bite me! Bill, yer dawg's bitin' me! Yer dawg! BIIIILLLLL! "
• "April 3rd. Day you gonna die"
• "This is actually fart. This uh, is high pressure fart. You can't smell it on camera but..."
• "Here's some drawings of gnomes that Sisky made. Yup, here's the mama gnome. I believe that's the emo son with the iPod."
• "Hey there little santi, how ya feelin? That's good. You feeling a little better? Oh, I heard you puked out your butt. Bye."
• "It's freakin' scooter time!"
• "Hey Michael, I got you chicken caboodles."
• "Fifth cookie."
• "The truth'll getcha. The truth'll bite ya in yo ass."
• "They say getting pooped on by a bird is good luck but I don't know if I believe that."
• "Remember when I broke my arm?! *no...*"

Chizzy:

• "One rubber band ball."
• "What do you think of Birmingham? It's good. I used to think it was 'Burn some ham'."
• "Behind there... the batter? The catcher. Don't you reckon he should dress in like, a Darth Vader suit?"
• "It reminds me a little bit of Australia, except for everyone's Texan here."
• "Where would we be without the pause button... without guitars."
• "Okay. Who am I? Butch Walker."
• "I mean, look at that. Look at that blue sky. You could uhh... you could... uhh... you could... paint it."
• "I think I just singed my hair! No, I'm serious! *You did, I can smell it!* Ahh it smells terrible! That was introduction to my hair singeing haha! Aw I just blew it out!"

William:

• "Austin. Dallas. San Antonio. Sheboygan."
• "Well, buck up ol' cheerio, we're gonna go and show the world how it's done."
• "It's like trying to fit 8 pounds of sh*t in a five pound bag. And I'm just gonna watch, right in front of this Thrifty."
• "More like, The Academy AIN'T."
• "Do you really think it's a good idea to have this banner on the side of the stage? *William, your hips don't lie!*"
• "And I was trying to think of what else has 'hot' in the title of the band names. And while I was doing that, Tony comes and he tells me 'Hey man, the shows canceled'. And I'm like 'yeah, haha, really funny right.'"
• "My name is not actually William Beckett. It's Beckett Williams."
• "Everything I had!"

Carden:

• "Dude that's bullsh*t, you gotta do 'Santi Life'!"
• "Coco bongosss."
• "I'm back, with my new glasses, honey dip."
• "What happened today? What happened Jack today? Today, the show got cancelled today. What happened today to you?"
• "Hey, what about when I dressed up like that sh*tty clown for Halloween?!"

Jack the Camera Guy:

• "You gotta understand that man! When you make bad decisions, bad decisions make you! DEMS DA BREAKS."
• "The travel experiences have been real great. I've seen almost every arena parking lot in the entire country. We went to Cancun, we went to Germany, we went to the UK; saw all those parking lots."

Guy Ripley:

• "Query the first. Who do you reckon would die in a no holds barred wrestling match... to the death?"
• "Now, coming from a country founded by criminals, did you find it difficult to be accepted into the western music scene?"
• "Delicious."
• "Tell me something. Do you find it difficult to hear people over the sound of your own beautiful face?"
• "EEEEEEEEEVERRRYYTHIIING WE HAD."
• "Victoria, why won't you love me anymoria? Like a partridge you do soaria."

Random:

• "Hey, it's The Academy Is... Answer your phone santi."
• "BURN THE MERCH! BURN! THE MERCH!"
• The Emo Wig
• "And of course, The Little Orphan Annie."
• "Mike Carden. God, as a back up vocalist, you know. He gets up there and he says, 'take back' or 'intoxicated circulation' and that's it. It's like Clint Eastwood. He doesn't say much, but what he does, it's impactive. It hits you."
• The Butcher: Drummer, Backup vocalist, Percussionist, Songwriter, Artist, Painter, No hands no problem bike rider, Loves oatmeal for sure, Recently bought a new bass guitar