- You suddenly switched from present tense to past tense. It's an awkward and hard transition to make.
- You have to be careful not to use fragments in your writing. They appear sporadically. A sentence has to have a subject, verb, and object. Here you just started with a verb phrase (giving).
- If I walked up to someone and said, “Giving him a bag of apples,” they would have no idea what I was talking about, right?
- You tend to forget introductory element commas. This is something to watch for when you do revisions for any essays.
- This is a bad sentence: I found two things, in my research, surprising: first, most anticoagulants are synthesized from molecules found in common plants; and second, a medication that has saved countless lives was originally used to take the life of rats.
mar 27 2013 ∞
apr 7 2013 +
apr 7 2013 +