pretty much all you need to do for this is write 5 things, these can be peoples names, places, emotions, a film title, song title, band, anything that sums up your day, do it each day on your listography for a year, copy and paste this at the top of the list so people know what this list is all about.

my start date: 03.05.17

• 0305: problems and solutions, fast pace by seventeen, 1 year since seventeen's 1st win, overthinking and feelings all over the place, not feeling to good about myself and everyone around me.
• 0405: finishing things, stressing over every little fucking thing, watching all of the aprils wrap ups/may tbr, SUSHI!!!, payment day.
• 0505: hip hop unit is everything to me, junk food, work, MY FUCKING CRUSH I WANNA HIT HIM, alguém me dá uma cervejinha.
• 0605: weird dreams, reading too much fanfiction, brooklyn nine nine, palha italiana, bored out of my mind.
• 0705: this star wont go out (finally finished after YEARS), lazy sunday, cutting my bangs and not messing up them!!, i cant handle this fucking feeling any longer.
• 0805: maiara e maraisa - sorte que cê beija bem, coca cola, i think i need new glasses (my eyes hurt), jeon wonwoo, i was in a good mood but then work STARTED TO STRESS ME LIFE IS HARD.
• 0905: STRESS SO MUCH STRESS, kwon soonyoung, seventeen one fine day in japan (I'm so behind), sandwich for dinner, this song will save your life.
• 1005: strawberry yogurt, SEVENTEEN VERNON TEASER, neurologist, can't drink coke anymore, this song will save your life.
• 1105: chocolate cake, SEVENTEEN JEONGHAN AND MINGYU TEASER!!!!!! FREAKING MEANIE ON MINGYU'S!!!!!!!, worked so much im destroyed, i'm not feeling too good, finished this song will save your life.
• 1205: SEVENTEEN DK WOOZI AND JUN TEASER!!!!!!!!!! (seventeen honestly have no chill) MY BABY SEUNGCHEOL ON WOOZI'S, feeling so sick most of the day, reading, the week is over yay, sleeping early.
• 1305: SEVENTEEN DINO WONWOO HOSHI TEASER I'M FUCKING WEAK, irritated with everything, AT LEAST I GOT DRUNK, weird day (but good), idk.
• 1405: SEVENTEEN SEUNGKWAN MINGHAO AND JOSHUA TEASER IM NOT READY FOR THE LAST ONE, ate too much, i slept during the day and dreamed about seventeen let me SLEEP pls, my body hurts, i dont want the weekend to end.
• 1505: MY FUCKING BABY CHOI SEUNGCHEOL TEASER I WANTED HIM TO BE THE LAST ONE BUT I ALMOST SMACKED MY HEAD IN THE WALL BECAUSE IT TOOK SO LONG OH MY GOD I LOVE HIM MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD and im gonna stop right there thanks, reading, B O R E D, moms birthday, a little sad.
• 1605: yes i will start this with seventeen AGAIN bc what else matters in my life so: choi seungcheol (loml), changing offices, i think im getting sick, a weird feeling that i dont know what it is, reading.
• 1705: I'm definitely sick, spending way too much money in medication, idek what happened today I just want to sleep for like 15 hours let me rest I'm tired. OH SEVENTEEN ALBUM HIGHLIGHT MEDLEY! ITS GONNA BE A FANTASTIC MINI ALBUM I can't wait to hear all of it.
• 1805: SO SO S O SICK ITS NOT FUNNY, a politica no brasil nem existe de vdd, can the week be over already? i just wanna lay in my bed, bis branco, its cold.
• 1905: still sick, the coldest of days, very happy that the week is over and i can rest, reading, trying to watch stuff.
• 2005: crying with laughter for most part of the day, seventeen one fine day (i finally catched up), sushi!!!, a weird feeling idk what happened but i dont like it, STILL sick but i stayed in bed all day so that was good, joshua and vernon.
• 2105: lazy day, milho cozido, IM SO PROUD OF BTS THEY DESERVE THE WHOLE WORLD, my hair is so big and beautiful (and clean), I'm finally not sick anymore thank god.
• 2205: SEVENTEEN'S COMEBACK IM SPEECHLESS HIP HOP UNIT SINGING IS MY EVERYTHING THEY COREOGRAPHY IS GREAT HOSHI DID IT AGAIN THE SONG IS AMAZING THE ALBUM IS AMAZING I LOVE THEM, choi seungcheol is the fucking love of my life, i basically breathed seventeen, i have some kind of allergy i dont have peace, enrolando muito.
• 2305: seventeen showcase (my babies I'm so happy), MY ARMS ARE KILLING ME MAKE THIS SHIT GO AWAY, jeon jungkook, reading, being a softie.
• 2405: going all over the fucking town and i almost got lost and getting a little stressed but everything turn out okay, min yoongi, reading, sleeping early (finally), still with that allergy that i cant explain.
• 2505: im changkyun (HATE HIM VERY MUCH YES), i hate Joshua too but i love him, larissas birthday (that got me drinking on a thursday night), feeling a little awkward around people i don't know but finishing the night very comfortable, I READ ONE AMAZING FANFIC THATS NOT FINISHED AND IM GONNA GO CRAZY BYE.
• 2605: i am starting to like to do work all over town (dont tell my boss that), my babies stages are amazing, finishing work early, wonwoo is the most beautiful human that ive ever seen, reading.
• 2705: my arms hurt, doctor who, soonwoo is my everything (also 95 line), migraine, not gonna stress over that anymore.
• 2805: churrasco, reading, people that drain your energy, soft words, jung wooseok.
• 2905: im changkyun (i think it was time for me to accept you, right? still hate you tho), stress and more tress and even more stress, so much headache, sad thoughts, it wasn't a good day.
• 3005: DON'T WANNA CRY FIRST WIN!!!!!!, missing college, my head still hurts, everyone around me is sick im afraid of getting sick again help, my fav fic updated.
• 3105: im a emotional mess, idk what's happening I don't know what's that feeling that won't go away and it's getting more frequent and I hate everything, cried too much for my own good, overthinked about every single thing that ever happened to me and that got very overwhelming very quickly, bad day.
• 0106: laughing with friends is actually the best thing and i needed that so much, i even won a hamburger, brigadeiro, seventeen is my whole world, it was honestly the best day of the week my mind was quiet my emotions werent all over the place.
• 0206: DONT WANNA CRY SECOND WIN!!!!! THEY WERE SO HAPPY IM SO HAPPY FOR THEM!!!!!!, my old boss is AMAZING, welcome to never land ill be your peter pan, salgadinhos!!!, SEVENTEEN SEVENTEEN SEVENTEEN AAAAAA IM NOT FUCKING BREATHING.
• 0306: reading, sleep during the day (and dreaming some weird shit), my eyebrows are looking hella fine, seeing one of my best friends after a while, eating tacos!!!
• 0406: my allergy is getting worse im sad, reading, sleeping during the day, migraine, disappointed but not fucking surprised.
• 0506: reading, all over town, going off work early, school 2015 (way more dramatic than i thought it would be lmao), tired.
• 0606: choi seunghyun (everythings gonna be okay.), doctors appointment, not working too much, so much fluff in the current fanfiction im reading its beautiful, jeon wonwoo.
• 0706: choi seunghyun, payday, sushi!!, i waste so much money today im sorry future me, kwon soonyoung is my everything.
• 0806: choi seunghyun (hes awake! thank god! keep your strength bb youre gonna get better!), MY LOVEEEE IS BACKKK THE KING OF KOREA DID T H A T AGAIN IM PROUD (im thinking of you hope youre ok i love you), seventeen dont wanna cry acoustic version IS AMAZING!!!! and C H E C K IN!!!!! and highlight aND VOCAL TEAM LOVES ME SO MUCH BC 20!!!!!!!!! and seungcheol wearing a pink button up shirt and jeans is my new favorite thing???, vmon song!!!!!!! vmin is the most beautiful friendship that EXISTS and tae's voice is so fucking beautiful, a good day fuelled with kpop but i also worked my ass off.
• 0906: choi seunghyun (hes out of the hospital!), juns birthday (its on the 10th but korea is 12 hours ahead sooooooooo), stress and headache and people dont pay attention to me why am i even surprised right, chocolate, sleeping early on the day that i dONT NEED TO.
• 1006: choi seunghyun, too much headache, reading, brooklyn nine nine. i love my brother.
• 1106: seventeen one fine day last ep :(, its funny to think that people can actually care about me (im a soft mess), sleeping most of the day, reading, im sad that the weekend is over.
• 1206: migraine, burger king for lunch and dinner, 4 years of bts, trying not to get stressed, reading way too much (love it).
• 1306: weird dreams, dont wanna cry 4th win, i need to stop getting stressed is honestly get really tiring, working too much, brooklyn nine nine (STOP FUCKING WITH MY BABIES 2k17)
• 1406: walking way too much, don't wanna cry 5th win!!!!, HOSHIS BIRTHDSYMY LOBEEEEEE, awful day, doctor who.
• 1506: feriado com direito a muita dor de cabeça, doctor who, dont wanna cry 6th (!!) win, reading, brigadeiro.
• 1606: crying bc of stress, but solving things!, so glad that the week is over, idek what more happened tbh.
• 1706: after weeks of too much stress its so good to be at home in bed all day doing nothing and not seeing anyone (i really need to take a time to breath and recover and be calm), reading, i hate wooseok so much and pentagon is gonna take over my life help, torta de frango, too much youtube (not even mad tho).
• 1806: sleeping soooo much, reading, doctor who, fresno!!!, im never going to buy a fucking laptop bc its more expensive EVERY FUCKING SECOND THAT PASSES IM MAD.
• 1906: MONSTA X COMEBACK IS AM A Z I N G i will actually kill changkyun and his fucking voice, burger king!, i hate wooseok (yes i know i said it two days ago), reading, it was such a calm day im so happy that i didnt get stressed i needed that so much.
• 2006: still calm bless, i wanna punch myself and wooseok right in the fucking face everytime i hear his voice in whatever pentagon song help, and yeah i listened to pentagon A LOT, bolinho de chuva!!!!!, reading (im really happy that im reading so much this year).
• 2106: the stress is back oh well (headache and fever apparently are a thing when im stressed), eating my stress away, people that dont even try to understand what im feeling, talking too much, doctor who.
• 2206: too cold, life is hard, jinho's voice is the most beautiful thing that ive ever heard in my life (and i will actually go insane from listening to pentagon too much), comfort food, finishing a book.
• 2306: I. NEED. TO. STOP. LISTENING. TO. PENTAGON., bis branco melhor bis, things going wrong at the end of the day at work (great way to end the week), expensive beer and "cheap" beer and burger!!!!, i love my best friends so much.
• 2406: idk what to feel, so much headache it wasnt fun, catching up on youtube, i need like 4 days just being at home doing nothing, its cold.
• 2506: sleeping soo much and having such weird dreams, laziest of days, bolo de cenoura!!, watching way too much youtube, cleaning my room.
• 2606: it was a good work day? i didnt had any problems? my head didnt hurt? im shocked, people saying "oh you look so young!" and my boss asking me what i feel when people say that it was funny, my night was completely wasted doing a bias thread what even am i doing with life, trying to watch doctor who, i t s c o l d.
• 2706: jeongcheol and meanie (do you mean my entire life?), a day without stress is always a good day, empadas baratas e gostosas!!, pool and beer for free count me in (finally getting over my fear of trying new things), its sad to see my friends heartbroken.
• 2806: all things work related are good bless, i cried watching idol drama operation team lmao im such a soft mess idk when that happened, too much peanuts, my allergy is back im sad srsly why does that happen to me, doctor who.
• 2906: walking so much (it took my 21 years but im finally learning how to move around this city), i think im getting sick help, my mood is still great this is amazing, doctor who, reading.
• 3006: SOOOOOOO SICK IT WAS A HORRIBLE DAY I WALKED SO MUCH AND WENT TO SO MANY PLACES AND I HAD A FEVER AND MY BODY HURTS AND EVERYTHING HURTS IM DESTROYED PLS HELP, idek what else happened tbh i cant believe im sick again :(
• 0107: IF I THOUGHT I WAS SICK YESTERDAY TODAY I WAS 100000000 TIMES WORSE OH MY GOD like i had a fucking fever all day??????? it just got worse as the day was passing and i thought it was never going to pass omg i couldnt stay out of my blankets and i couldnt get up and walk???? i couldnt eat????? and everytime i slept i woke up worse it was very nice im tired, but i caught up with daredevil (fucking finally), and saw the episode before the season finale of doctor who, i wanted to go see my friends im pretty sad about it tbh
• 0207: i cant with this sickness any longer and i just want my fever to go away pls help
• 0307: ITS COLD AND IM STILL SO SICK SOMEBODY HELP MEEEEEEEEEEE, work while sick and without eating anything AND with your whole body weak is such a bad idea dont do it kids, but at the end of the day i managed to eat!!!!! victory.
• 0407: i woke up feeling much better! i finally feel like a human being again i never thought this would happen THANK GOD and it put me in such a good mood (the medicine that i took is definitely great - but definitely STRONG), c o l d, songsong couple is REAL AND THEYRE GONNA GET MA R R IE ED!!!!!!, adachi yuto, doctor who season finale.
• 0507: well you see. i was a little wrong about feeling good but eVeRyThInG iS fInE, bts bon voyage, i just wanna be able to EAT normal again :(, SOME SHIT AT WORK THAT WAS MAKING ME GO INSANE IS FINALLY DONE IM RELIEVED BEYOND MESURE, counting the days for the week to be over.
• 0607: if i throw up one more time i will actually go insane bye, at least i managed to eat, !!!books!!!, all the wraps ups and tbr's, JO JINHO MEU PITOQUINHO.
• 0707: I HAVE A NEW LAPTOP THIS DAY IS AMAZING THANK GODI CANT BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING YAY, it was such a good day i was in such a good mood, i mean i dont have any money for the rest of the month BUT it was so worth it bless, idek what to do with myself, im not eating enough to i should get that fixed
• 0807: so weird to have a laptop again idk what to do tbh, watched some movies and some kpop stuff, slept so much, im still not eating enough its making me angry and sad :(, I W AN T SOME B E ER.
• 0907: people are annoying, suspicious partner (amazing), pão de alho, my hair is looking BEAUTIFUL after a week of being a complete mess bc i was so sick i couldnt do anything with it, good and relaxing weekend bless.
• 1007: nice calm day i love when the day is like this, my wifi wasnt working it was a wild ride, i need to start eating MORE its making me sad, talking for hours with my brother (love him sm), the handmaids tale.
• 1107: you see it took me long enough to start to be stressed again BUT HERE WE ARE, im tired of walking and solving things that are not for me to solve yk fuck this, i need!!!!!! to eat!!!! MORE BUT I CANT I LITERALLY CANT WITH ANYTHING ANYMORE, people that doesnt seem to care about you is really great i dont want to go back to this feeling so im gonna cut it right here right now (!), getting back to reading.
• 1207: people are very funny its A M A Z I N G to watch ha, it was such a stressful day omg the universe was against me today, suspicious partner (mY EVERYTHING), spending money when i shouldnt be but oh well, tired so fucking tired i cant handle this srsly.
• 1307: s t r e s s and way too many complications at work LET ME LIVE PLS, my head is thinking too much and wanting too much is a little overwhelming but eVeRyThInG iS fInE, shadowhunters, the commute finale!!! (claudia is honestly a good actress and she deserves so much - and work so hard for all that she get in her life, it is inspiring), starting to eat better but not quite there yet.
• 1407: seventeen is literally all that matters in my life they are everything to me, feijoada, it was a very stressful day with a very stressful end to it BC MT LAPTOP HATES ME, gave up on people, reading bc i had nothing else to do HA HA HA HA.
• 1507: im gonna throw my laptop out of the window, SEUNGCHEOL AND HIS RED HAIR LIKE SO RED LIKE THE REDEST WTF I DIDNT SAW THAT COMING AT ALL, watching all kinds of stuff, crying so much (its the pms), finishing the upside of unrequited.
• 1607: MY BOY MY SOULMATE MY BABY WONWOO BIRTHDAY IN KOREA, definitely about to get my period i was so irritated and emotional all day was literally horrible, my internet DIDNT WORK ALL DAY IN THIS FUCKING LAPTOP IM GONNA KILL SOMEONE, watched some movies tho, and fucked up my bangs (had been a long time since i did something shitty to them soooo).
• 1707: STRESS AND TEARS AND WAY TOO MANY PROBLEMS WHAT A GOOD MONDAY AM I RIGHT, it was a nightmare im tired i worked an hour more than usual and all i can think about was how much of a AWFUL DAY TODAY WAS but im gonna stop, i planned on watch got but honestly its not possible my mind just wants to sleep (also i didnt sleep much last night so), watching youtube for like the whole day (it was the only thing that kept me sane tbh), readingggg.
• 1807: EXO COMEBACKKKKKKKK A M A Z I N G THE ALBUM IS AMAZING!!!!, chanyeol is the love of my life i will have to kill him and also seungcheol bc i dont know how is it possible to love two people so much ok bye, also work is hard, my allergy is back yay, finishing this modern love.
• 1907: things that make me uncomfortable, o sistema da caixa nunca mais vai voltar aparentemente, MY FAV FANFIC IM A EMOTIONAL MESS, PEOPLE THAT MAKE ME NERVOUS IN MANY WAYS STOPPPP THIS FEELING, readinggg.
• 2007: MINHA PUPILA FICOU DILATADA O DIA INTEIRO ACHEI QUE NUNCA MAIS IA VOLTAR AO NORMAL (nunca mais trabalhar depois de exame de vista pls), my eye sight is worse this is amazing, THE EVE STAGE IS I N C R E D I B L E im glad that they're promoting it too bc is indeed the best song on the album, waaaay too much work, in a good mood tho.
• 2107: well theres wasnt much work today but oh boy i did get stressed as HELL people are difficult work is difficult adulting is difficult, balas macias!!!!, adachi yuto (ASSHOLE), dear white people (the series) is really maintaining the bisexuals Are Cheaters That Fuck Everyone Around Them stereotype oh lord netflix stop, too much booktubeathon tbrs videos.
• 2207: saturdays are my favvv, suspicious partner, my internet DYING OF FUCKING COURSE I NEED TO GET THIS LAPTOP FIGURE OUT AS SOON AS I CAN, i love pentagon so much and i hate yuto just as much, moana.
• 2307: my hair is clean and i did my nails (which i havent done in like 5 months or so so yeah big deal) i feel like a new person, finish a book, the handmaids tale is honestly so good, ok i really dont want to put yuto here again for the third day straight but FUCK IT I HATE THIS KID I WAS ATTACKED WHEN I WOKE UP THIS IS HONESTLY GETTING OUT OF HAND PLS I NEED RESPECT, the weekend should last longer.
• 2407: weird stressful day but lets keep the good mood and keep focused on being energetic idk i was feeling good yesterday and i want this to last, it was a good month migraine related but now is getting bad again :( stop, EXO IS SO FUCKING FUNNY I LOVE MY BABIES SO MUCH IM HAPPY THAT THEYRE BEING ACTIVE AGAIN THEY SEEM HAPPY TOO, suspicious partner (i need to see this properly i love it so much but i DONT HAVE TIME OR STABLE INTERNET IN MY LAPTOP), lets try to finish this book soon its taking too long.
• 2507: welp stress is funny, work is hardddddd, at least i got chocolate and BEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRR im the literally happiest oh my god, but honestly i need to !stop! drinking in the middle of the week, in another note i love pentagon so so so so much idk whats happening THEY DID A MUSIC VIDEO FOR TO UNIVERSE OF FUCKING COURSE THEY DID I WAS A EMOTIONAL MESS.
• 2607: the worst day i fucking hate everything and everyone and this week just need to be OVER i literally cant take anymore shit, my migraine is so fucking shitty it was fine yk the month was calm in this aspect and this week just FUCKED EVERY LITTLE THING IN MY LIFE FUCK THIS SHIT, im mad im sad im done k bye.
• 2707: my head and my body was exausted bc of the day before my energy was completely drained, but it was a calm day thank god i think i would go crazy if i got more stressed, pentagon is taking over my life what is this i need space i need yuto to STOP i love them so much but i do hate yuto dont get me wrong, just one more day and then the weekend BLESS, readathon vlogs.
• 2807: well today was a rollacoaster of feelings and it started bad but then it was AMAZING and then MY BUS DIDNT STOP FOR ME and then i got home and everything went to shit, i dont think i will ever get over this on my own tbh everything is bottled up and makes me feel very shitty when i think about it (and i always try to not think about it but sometimes i remember and it sucks yk), meu salário aumentou entao yay, yuto :(, i just wanna cry so fuck everything bye.
• 2907: today was way better than yesterday idk man some days are just hard but what can we do right everything is FINE, I NEED TO WATCH SUSPICIOUS PARTNER HELP I LOVE IT SO MUCH BUT I JUST WANNA SEE IT WHEN I CANT, didnt do anything important or relevant, im gonna smash yutos head against the wall until i dont want to kick his face any longer bye, life is funny.
• 3007: FINALLY FINISHED ALL THE LIGHT WE CAN NOT SEE I DIDNT THINK IT WAS POSSIBLE OH MY GOD ITS BEEN 84 YEARS, my straightener gave up on life its one more thing for me to buy honestly what did i do to deserve this, handmaids tale is A M A Z I N G, i need this week to be calmer than last week pls is all that i ask.
• 3107: ok it was a good start to the week everything was good, bomba de chocolate (!!), look everything in my life is fucked up what did i do honestly, that japanese kid that i really dont want to name anymore here and im starting to FREAK OUT BC OH MY GOD STOP LEAVE ME ALONE, my migraine is shitty still.
• 0108: this situation is exhausting, PAY DAY, my body is starting to feel all the emotions idk im breaking, yitinho :(, PEOPLE ARE ANNOYING.
• 0208: it was a uneventful day tbh i dont remember anything, miss my crush, i love way too much apparently, my head is way to excited to shut down.
• 0308: the day started with impulsive decisions idk what im doing helpppppp, I CRIED SO MUCH BC OF PENTAGON OH MY FUCKING GOD and then bc of stress i was a emotional mess, i love all of them so much oh my god im gonna have another ultimate group i already know i need spACE, huidawn is goals and soulmates and the loves of each others life bye (also wooyu are my babies), the days should have more hours (for me to see the things that i like of course).
• 0408: i need to get back to work seriously like TAKE THAT SHIT SERIOUS, hanbin in the airplane mv i found my new favorite thing AND AIRPLANE ITSELF AMAZING, i love seventeen more than anything that EXISTS, didnt do a single thing that i wanted after i got home from work, finally the weekend thank god.
• 0508: walked sooooo much and bought a new pair of glasses and a new straightener!!!!, it was a nice day with my best friends, binged pentagon maker and never laughed so much i love them all oh my god IM GONNA FINISH THIS WITH LIKE 3 NEW BIAS I CANT I LOVE MY BABIES, yuto crying was the death of me (i love you), went to sleep way too late.
• 0608: you see my plan was to finish pentagon maker this weekend bc my laptop is gonna go get fixed and im gonna be without him for like A MONTH but my internet had other plans :):, some weird shit dreams????, game of thrones (the first episode of the new season bc im late), the handmaids tale, messes up my sleeping schedule but everything is FINE.
• 0708: LOVE OF MY LIFE DAY IN KOREA HAPPY BDAY BABY, I CRIED SO MUCH BC OF PENTAGON OH MY GOD I NEVER KNEW I HAD SO MUCH TEARS IN MY BODY I LOVE THEM SO MUCH IM GLAD THAT THEY ARE TOGETHER MY OT10 THAT LOVE EACH OTHER SO FREAKING MUCH, my work is testing me in so many ways, my nails are so pink its funny to look at lmao, last day with my laptop :(.
• 0808: solving things and then more problems appearing bc thats how work works (?), i never knew i got hangry but i guess its just the stress, first day without my laptop im sadd, thinking about stuff that i dont want to think and messing up my head bc of that, sleeping early FINALLY.
• 0908: uneventful day, it was calm it was nice i havent had a day like this in weeks, but i literally forgot to do something oops, finished a book, sleePING LATE AGAIN IM DONE.
• 1008: i honestly don't know why I did this to myself I was in a good place and I was happy with life and now I can't stop crying bc I don't know what to do and everything is hard and I'm afraid to end up like I was before I don't know if it is worth if and I don't know ir I'm gonna regret if I do it or if I don't do it you know I WAS FINE I HATE THIS FEELING FUCK EVERYTHING, my mind is so fucking tired my body is tired I'm exhausted in every way possible I really must not like myself, but in other news my first boss is retiring and I owe so much to her it was a weird feeling but I'm happy for her, I just put my heart out in this shit didn't I? it's because idk who to talk to and how people are gonna react and honestly I didn't even know what to say so yeah it's enough.
• 1108: today and yesterday were the worst days of 2017 i cried so much i was a fucking mess never doing that to myself again, also i ended the day THROWING UP WHY DOES EVERYTHING HATE ME, i love my dad SO much, kang hyunggu, bleh.
• 1208: finished pentagon maker!!!!! i love pentagon so much oh my god and changgu loves yanan so much toooooooooooooo they all love each other so much they would be so sad if they hadnt debut together I LOVE MY OT10, made new glasses im stoked, sobrancelha feita = felicidade, bolinho de chuva, LISA'S PLAY ME LIKE YOUR TOY IM ALL YOURS TO ENJOY.
• 1308: family gathering for fathers day/my uncles birthday, apparently i cant eat properly AGAIN amazing, watched WAY too much youtube, after a week of HOT PINK NAILS its weird to have a neutral color, yeo changgu.
• 1408: stress and disappointment but what can we do right, not feeling great, tired, I need to stop crying, I love seventeen.
• 1508: wasnt feeling great, BUT MY LAPTOP IS B A C K!!!!!!, bolo de cenoura, the handmaids tale (just one more episode to finish), vernon and kino pls i love my families.
• 1608: besides the fact that im stressed all the time i think im finally getting excited about work again (like actually wanting to do stuff), my crush is back!!, new glasses!!!!! IM ABLE TO SEE THINGS CLEARLY AGAIN AMAZING, the handmaids tale is a MASTERPIECE, VERNON AND KINO PLS I LOVE MY FAMILIES.
• 1708: kwon jiyong day in korea! love you baby, writing way too much emails, my mood is getting better and im working more (finally bc i was gettin worried), FINALLY BOUGHT SOME SHOES TOO I NEEDED IT S O MUCH, things are more clear in my head and its good but is also terrifying.
• 1808: my bro's birthday!!!, it was calm at work mostly bc people dont respond my emails!!!!!!!!!!!, it was a good day but my mind at the end was like a fucking mess i think it was the shit that i watched that triggered stuff and i couldnt stop think about things and my body reacted to that and my mind and yeah what to do right, cant focus on anything :(, but the week is over! i need to put my mind at ease this weekend and just relax and do things that are gonna make me happy.
• 1908: migraine, i actually had a fucking fever too it was horrible, it was a hard day but at night it got better i was in such a good mood, nct life, adachi yuto.
• 2008: lazy sunday, reading and sleeping all day, my friend came visit me and after he was gone he sent me a message saying how much he missed me i was soft, 5 weeks straight doing my nails im proud (but 3 of them broke and im sad bc i painted them red which is my favorite i wish they hadnt broke), youtube foR DAYS.
• 2108: trying not to get stressed, didnt do much, funny, ADACHI GUTINHO, my head is weird.
• 2208: WORK IS ANNOYING, my new boots came!!!!, coke is gross, i was supposed to leave work early BUT LIKE I SAID WORK IS ANNOYING AND ALSO PEOPLE THAT MAKE YOU WAIT, cleaned my room (im much better with keeping it clean but it was starting to get really messy).
• 2308: this week is passing so slow, it was a slow day too, produce 101!!!!!! i finally started!!!!!!!!!, i really dont care about certain things anymore, my internet hates me and i slept late for no reason at all.
• 2408: the day was good the night was shitty im so stressed but i'll try not to focus on that and say some shit that happened today (good shit), bomba de chocolate, produce 101 (i will literally never finish this thing bc everything hates me), people that talk to you only when needs to vent about their love life and nothing else, fuck this shit i was in a good mood all week why cant i have nice things.
• 2508: chill day but i had a headache bc of sleeping bad last night and i was in a weird mood feeling weird shit but it happens, people are annoying, sanduiche, my laptop is gonna drive me insane, produce 101 WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE.
• 2608: waking up late is amazing, produce 101 (should have watched more episodes but im trying not to force myself into things when im clearly mentally tired), too many monthly wrap ups (like old ones idk i was feeling a little weird), lai guanlin.
• 2708: produce 101 I LOVE WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS SHIT I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF, my internet hates me actually this laptop hates me, i wish that the weekend could last at least one more day, finished shadowhunters, im gonna explode from listen to energetic so much.
• 2808: getting off work early, shitty tv shows, i ended up starting a episode of produce 101 at like half past midnight and ending at three am so my sleep appreciate it, i cried bc of jonghyun for FORTY FIVE MINUTES I WAS SOBBING AT ONE POINT BC OF THE DAY NUEST AND WANNA ONE WERE PROMOTING TOGETHER AND WANNA ONE GOT THEIR WIN AND MINHYUN CRIED BC NUEST WAS RIGHT THERE AND THEY WERE SMILING TRYING TO REASURE HIM AND I LOVE THEM THEY DESERVE THE WORLD JONGHYUN DESERVES THE UNIVERSE IM SAD but srsly i started crying at the announcement of first place in ep 8 and couldnt stop and I KNOW what happens im sad, im crearly a emotional mess.
• 2908: need to fix my sleep asap, my eyes are the double of the size and red and hurting (WELP I DISCOVERED THAT I CUTED MY EYELID?????????), i thought that i was gonna be a zombie the whole day but i was actually fine but i need to sleep for at least 8 hours bc i slept like 7 hours the last two days COMBINED, i passed by my university today and i was remembering things that i lived there for 2 years and a half and i was feeling grateful for all that i lived (even the worse bits of it) and im glad that i dont regret the fact that i didnt go back so yeah theres that, kim jonghyun (love u).
• 3008: slow day but a little bit stressful, laughed so MUCH BC OF NUEST OH MY GOD PLEDIS LET ME GOOOOO, half episode of produce im lowkey sad that im finishing it but i know that im gonna cry so much at the end so I JUST WANT IT TO BE OVER AND I CAN SEE HAPPY THINGS FROM EVERYONE THAT I LOVE, gourmet beer tbh so expensive omg, soft.
• 3108: i did like a hundred fucking things and didnt stop all day and i was CALM, but then at night my kindle decided that he was gonna fuck me up so yeah im so stressed i could break something, i dont have ANY MONEY AT ALL I NEED MY PAYMENT FOR YESTERDAY, good fanfiction, kim jonghyun is the only person possible.
• 0109: well i i got my money early so YAY MONEY, i got soft for a reason at work so im gonna do my very best to be productive and yeah, jeong sewoon debut album is incredible thank god for talent, and oohhhh pentagons album is gonna be AMAZING they fucking produced everything i love my talented rookies!!!!!!! my 98 line is so precious oh my fucking god yuto and wooseok wrote like almost all of the songs and kino PRODUCED ONE im proud love them SO much, reading some shit that got into my head words and description of feelings can really fuck you up (but like i know its well written and that i like it i just need to distance myself a little you know).
• 0209: cried bc i laughed too much and half an hour later i was legitly crying are you happy mnet, kang daniel, got really drunk oh my god, i need to get out of the house sometimes right, fun day.
• 0309: hangover days are never fun but it wasnt that bad just my head hurting, FINISHED PRODUCE 101 OH MY GOD I CRIED SO MUCH no but really i cried so much watching this entire shit i never thought that that was possible, kim jonghyun is the light of my life, i love taehyun and he loves sungwoon and i love sungwoon too oh my god i love way too many people i got attached, sad that the weekend is over.
• 0409: shit im fucking exhausted (its also 2am i should have been asleep LIKE FOUR HOURS AGO), im trying to be responsible at work lets hope for the best, soft mess oh my lord, always is such an emotional song help i cant stop listening to it, !!!panwink!!!
• 0509: FINISHING HARD SHIT AT WORK AND RECEIVING COMPLIMENTS FOR IT!!!!!!, wasnt feeling great most of the day, tired as fuck, 7 years that i met my best friend, i love nuest more than i probably should.
• 0609: PENTAGONS COMEBACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A-FUCKING-MAZING OH MY GOD HUI EVERYTHING THAT YOU LAY YOUR EYES IS YOURS OH MY GOD HES INCREDIBLE HIS SONGS ARE SO A PLUS now that he wrote two for p101 everyone better recognize him for the AMAZING song writer he is oh my god im impressed my babies, my other babies youngmin and donghyun debut!!!!!!!!! so cute my loves im so happy that youngmin debuted he deserved so much i love my man, it was such a problematic day at work oh my god i got so stressed that i had a fever? fun as heck but everything turn out well at the end thank g o d, found a new favorite food, i love nuest so much i just realized that i said this yesterday too but pls theyre gonna eat my heart.
• 0709: i SOBBED LIKE A FUCKING BABY BC OF NUEST OH MY FREAKING GOD ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO CRY SO MUCH BC OF ONE GROUP IN SO LITTLE TIME IM DRAINED I LOVE THEM TO DEATH, but man jonghyun crying like SOBBING reading his letter to the fans and to his members was like a stab to my heart i love him more than anything in the world he deserves so much i hope he knows now that hes a good leader and that hes so talented and deserves so much more! (i can talk about him for days so im gonna stop right here), daniel is the cutest person, i watched so much stuff tbh it was relaxing, but my migraine decided to be a pain in the ass at night time.
• 0809: wasnt feeling great i think my body is almost sick but is trying to fight it at the same time, paying bills why is adulting like this, bought a shoe, drinking and seeing friends, tired as fuck.
• 0909: relaxing day, getting rid of old clothes, doctor strange, junk food, im gonna sue pledis bc everything that comes from there takes over my heart in the softest way possible.
• 1009: weird dreams, kino is the cutest human being i love him, its dangerous outside the blankets, hot dogs, the weekends are always so short.
• 1109: i'm way too soft for my own good, i was so useless today tho oh my god, changgu's sooooooonnnnggg!!! my baby is the softest, tired as heck i need to fix my sleep asap, my laptop is still testing me.
• 1209: getting some worries of my shoulders aka complicated stuff being finished, people that deserve only good things in their lifes, yuto verse in cool rap/get that drink, idk why i am so tired but ok, i think i have another allergy my body honestly gave up on me and my health.
• 1309: waking up at 4am, WORKING S O O O O MUCH, eating way too much sugar, so stressed it was the first day that i took my migraine medicine this month :(, noh taehyun.
• 1409: bobbys album!!! MY SON DESERVED BETTER IDK WHY BOTH OF THE MVS WERE TAKEN DOWN SO MANY TIMES THE SONGS AND THE MVS ARE SO GOOD IM SAD IT SHOULD BE A HAPPY DAY FOR HIM, didnt have the energy to work properly, bought the second book on the mistborn trilogy IM LIVING, sushi!!, hwang minhyun.
• 1509: im on top of all of my work????amazing and almost unbelievable tbh bc my head was trashy and it was affecting my work all week, i have wifi!!!!!!!!!!! now THIS is unbelievable i didnt think my computer even know that it was possible to have a wifi, daniel and xiumin is a great pair they should do a reality with just the two of them, jonghyun is the most loveable human in the world and also the softest and i love him more than anything, i was thinking about going out BUT i think i made the right choice staying at home.
• 1609: SEVENTEEN DROPPING THINGS ABOUT NEW STUFF OUT OF NO FUCKING WHERE IM SCREAMING THERES GONNA BE A SVT LEADERS UNIT ITS THE THING THAT EVERYONE KNEW THEY NEEDED AND THEYRE GONNA MAKE IT HAPPEN I LOVE MY FAMILY, watched 2 movies and way too much wanna one and mxm shit, and i of course cried bc of minhyun but also jisung i love themmmm, i really love saturdays the most, i'm such a soft mess its incredible.
• 1709: carrot cake!!!, relaxing day, slept all of the afternoon, catched up on youtube, something weird is going on with my body i have some red spots that I DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS HELP.
• 1809: bts comeback!!!!!!!!!!, i think im getting sick idk my body is feeling weird its weak and hurting and i cant eat properly and my head is a mess sigh, didnt do much at work, i love my soft boys aka youngmin and donghyun, got my brand new converses!!! *converse high by bts softly plays in the background*.
• 1909: didnt do anything at work bc THE SYSTEM WAS OUT amazing, started produce 101 season 1 tho bc i lost the control over my life, my mood was ????? idk kinda irritated but them kinda excited talking with myself in such a happy tone idk it was weird, lmao, tbh i think i need some time off work to recover my energy but i also think that this is the pms talking.
• 2009: i had a fever and was so fucking tired, also super hungry which is awesome bc it means that IM EATING WELL, reading good stuff, work is a pain in the ass and a more pain in the ass when you CANT DO SHIT, kang daniel.
• 2109: i still had a fever oh my god STOP, didnt do much at work, im kinda sick kinda tired kinda done with this week, seventeen dvd for diamond edge in japan my heart is so full but so sad i love my family, americans are fucking crazy and stupid and no one is surprised.
• 2209: woke up earlier than usual it was awful, my baby guanlin birthday in korea, im kinda scared at work bc things are changing at the bank and its crazy and I STILL CANT DO ANYTHING BC NOTHING WORKS get your shit together @ caixa, i saw someone so beautiful when i was coming home and it got my in some weird funk at night overthinking stuff bc its hard to accept and to say some stuff to other people im scared, got my dramafever back fucking finally.
• 2309: i was in a really good mood, reading and napping, the confession tapes leaves you really lost, i love bts so much they love each other so much they are so funny i honestly cant, im gonna murder kino with my bare hands bye.
• 2409: SEVENTEEN LEADERS SONG OH MY FUCKING GOD I DEFINITELY WASNT READY LIK O H M Y G O D IT WAS A MA Z I NG I DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT BUT THAT WAS INSANE IM LIVING PLS KWON SOONYOUNG RAPPING I WAS SHAKING FROM THE MOMENT HE OPENED HIS MOUTH UNTIL LIKE HALF AN HOUR LATER AFTER I FINISHED WATCHING THE MV SEVENTEEN WAS LIKE HERE DARLING LET ME SHOW YOU HOW I OWN YOUR FUCKING ASS NEVER FORGET THAT I LOVE EVERYTHING I LOVE THE MV THE COLORS THEIR OUTFITS ALL OF THEM ARE SO UNBELIAVABLE BEAUTIFUL AND TALENTED AND THE SONG IS EVERYTHING THEIR VOICES ARE OUT OF THIS WORLD K BYE THATS ENOUGH IM STILL SHOOK BY IT I NEVER WATCHED SOMETHING SO MANY TIMES IN SO LITTLE TIME I LOVE MY LEADER LINE MY FAMILY THEY ARE MY EVERYTHING, do i even need to say anything else i breathed changed up, also didnt sleep basically at all, family is stressful, NUEST IS GONNA MAKE ME CRY I ALREADY KNOW I JUST CRY BC OF THIS GROUP OH MY GOD THE GROUP PICTURE FOR THE COMEBACK WITH THE STILL MISSING BUT WERE HERE AND THE STILL MISSING ON TOP OF THE W OF THE W.HERE FUCK ME I LOVE THEM I WISH MINHYUN COULD GO BACK IM GONNA CRY UNTIL MY BABIES ARE BACK TOGETHER FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIFES BYYYYYE IM A EMOTIONAL MESS BC OF PLEDIS TODAY (this shit is so long).
• 2509: woke up throwing up amazing start to the week am i right, doing things that i dont like but it was fine actually, do you see yesterday i was talking about nuest and seventeen and now guess what woozi wrote a song in nuest album im gonna combuste with love, dont know how to explain things take make me uncomfortable to people, the book that i bought arrived (at like 8pm? k).
• 2609: my work needs to get their shit together so i can do stuff, talked about stuff comfortably with a friend it was awesome and i feel so much lighter now, got drunk and was really happy tbh with people that are laid back and fun, weird shitttttt that i probably should stay away butttt, t i r e d.
• 2709: i cant take this sickness anymore pls let me rest, the system at work is slowly starting to work again, doing stuff outside of the office when IM WEAK AND SICK AND WANT TO THROW UP ISNT FUN, memories man lots of memories, this week literally doesnt end.
• 2809: didnt go to work, wasnt feeling good, my stomach is gonna kill me, slept most of the day, everything that i eat makes me sick but im so hungry its incredible.
• 2909: went to the doctors and i may have something really serious im a little scared lol, im in so much pain its not fun, also i cant eat a lot of stuff this is gonna be a fun ride!, well i CANT EAT AT ALL WITHOUT FEELING PAIN AND WANTING TO THROW UP SO ITS ALREADY A FUN RIDE, im so fucking tired i just wanna get better.
• 3009: im so sick i cant anymore, i cried in frustration bc im so hungry all the time but i cant eat without feeling like throwing up and my stomach hurst SO MUCH im worried as fuck, i couldnt concentrate in almost anything bc of how i am feeling, bts bon voyage, i need some time off :(.
• 0110: SEVENTEEN HIP HOP UNIT NEW SONG I LOVE MY LANEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE OH MY GOD MINGYU SINGING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE MY TALENTED BOY HE JUST KEEPS IMPROVING IM HERE FOR IT WONWOO AND VERNON VERSE ARE SO POWERFUL AND RAW AND HEARTBREAKING I LOVE THEM TO DEATH AND WHAT DO I NEED TO SAY ABOUT MY ENTIRE WORLD IN A PERSON FORM RIGHT MY LOVE SEUNGCHEOL IS ALWAYS AMAZING I LOVE HIS VOICE SO MUCH OH BUT SERIOUSLY THEY ARE SO FUCKING TALENTED IS ENDEARING THEY KEEP SURPRISING ME AND THIS MONTH IS GONNA BE AMAZING BC THERES NEW STUFF EVERY WEEK I LOVE MY FAMILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, i just want to eaatttt, i really cant with this anymore, jbj boys are so extra honestly, i dont want to work i just wanna rest until i have energy and im healthy again and can EAT pls i just think about food i dont wanna be hungry anymore.
• 0210: work wasnt that bad but the system is still not working properly WHEN WILL THEY GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER, eating is a struggle im a little scared, i cant stop listening to bobbys album its just a MASTERPIECE full of amazing songs bye, jonghyun is the most amazing man that ever walked on earth, bts bon voyage.
• 0310: i! want! to! EAT! im so hungry S TO P, my stomach hurts im ti re d of thisss, but finished things at work! im finally on top of my work again thank god system down plus me not going for two days made me a little lost, wrap ups and tbrs, i love 2hyun to death.
• 0410: ok i had a dream with daniel and ong and it has been almost 24 hours and im still thinking about it im soft and sad and tbh a little needy, well i love kang daniel so much and im gonna stop here bc i CAN go on about it, things going the right way and things going terrible wrong (but its not my fault so fuck this shit), i love apples, this is us (so emotional).
• 0510: i think i dont have the thing that the doctor thought that i had!!!!!!! yay!! but still dont know wtf i have so, i ate what i wasnt supposed to eat but fuck this shit at least im not hungry anymore ive been hungry for the past week bless (lets see what i think about this decision tomorrow shall we), dont wanna really think too much about certain stuff so lets stop here before it turns out bad, i love seventeen more than anything theyre my everything im not even joking, i also love wanna one so much theyre precious and im so attached this is gonna hurt in a year.
• 0610: slow day at work but im happy that i survived the week, i woke up throwing up but i managed to eat during the day so idk how that leaves things..., i love seventeen and nuest im gonna go buy pledis, also i love jbj theyre so laid back its nice, i think i found my new favorite thing.
• 0710: OK BUT I CANT BELIEVE THAT IM GONNA ADVENTURE MYSELF INTO ANOTHER SURVIVAL SHOW IN SO LITTLE TIME OH MY GOD I KNOW THIS SHIT MESSES UP MY HEART BUT WHAT CAN WE DO RIGHT STRAY KIDS IS SO AMAZING IM LISTENING TO HELLEVATOR SINCE YESTERDAY NON STOP I CANT WHY JUST WHY and i already wanna punch someone in the face and i probably shouldnt, ayto is so trashy i love it, brooklyn nine nine, im in such a good mood all day its amazing but idk why im confused, slept for all the afternoon i know i say this every week but i love saturdays the most.
• 0810: PERFORMANCE UNIT SONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG THEY INVENTED COREOGRAPHY SERIOUSLY AMAZING AND INCREDIBLE ITS THE FUNDAMENTAL OF SEVENTEEN BEING SINCHRONIZED BUT MAN THAT WAS PURE A R T AND JUN AND MINGHAO HAD LINES SO IM SATISFIED SWIMMING FOOL COULD NEVER (i will always be bitter about that), s t r a y k i d s, tried to watch a new kdrama but viki was being a little bitch, read a little during the day, thought that i was going to go to bed early but it just never happens on sundays, im in such a good mood idk if its bc i can eat again but im loving it.
• 0910: started the day stressed as fuck, didnt have anything to do, going to the other side of the city but getting home early, while you were sleeping, sf9 is so funny i missed them.
• 1010: HOSHI DAYYYYYYYYY (lol i needed to the minute i wrote 1010), NU E S T COMEBACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BEAUTIFUL TALENTED SONSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS MY ENTIRE LIFEEEEEEEEEEE A MA Z I NG THE SONG THE MV THEIR VOICES THEIR VISUALS MY LIVE I LOVE THEM I LOVE MINHYUN ALSOHOW CAN I MISS SOMEONE WHEN I SEE HIM IN OTHER GROUP AND I DIDNT EVEN LIKE NUEST BEFORE YOU KNOW BUT THEYRE FAMILY AND I LOVE MY FAMILU PLS THEY ALMOST HAD AN ALL KILL THE LST TIME I SAW THEY DESERVE SO SO SO SO MUCH I HOPE THEY CAN GET A FIRST WIN MY B ABIES, walked a l l over town im tireddddd, today is the official 1st pentagon anniversay i love my other family i have way too much love i was so soft bc of them and nuest i love them all so much they deserve everything!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, saw my friends from middle school im so soft its little anything changed and its amazing that feeling.
• 1110: I CRIED SO MUCH OH MY GOD I DIDNT KNOW I COULD CRY THAT MUCH OVER ONE THING first i woke up to seventeen posting about nuest and calling them BROTHERS, then i proceed to cry over nuest like 6 times bc 1 they let minhyuns adlib on overcome 2 someone posting a thing with minhyun saying he trusted jonghyun on p101 the first time he became a leader 3 the lyrics to the jonghyun solo song (that is for minhyun dont @ me) 4 wanna one bday surprise for minhyun 5 the lyrics tothe dongho solo song bc it was for his father who died :( 6 the fancam of p101 after the ep11 finished when minhyun is crying SO MUCH oh man srsly this shit is wild i love them to death and they love and respect each other SO much :( i hope they can get recognized like they deserve, but outside of that i was really stressed i need peace, its SO HOT, reading a little.
• 1210: im a little off balance the last couple of days but im trying to not let this bother me and get over it but its not happening, slept a lot during the day, brooklyn nine nine, ayto is so trashy i dont know why i like it so much, catching up on youtube.
• 1310: stressed and not feeling great and crying over things, then i turned into crying over kpop bc much better right!, went to work and had nothing to do, im very tired, but saw my best friend at the end of the day and that mademe feel a little better.
• 1410: idk man im not feeling good in any way, my body is not good either but it is better than a few weeks ago???idk its a different shitty thing, finished a book at least, slept a little during the day but i was tired the rest of the night idk id k, hello migraine good to see you back hun its been a while!
• 1510: MY VOCAL UNIT S O N G THEY NEVER DISAPOINT ME OH MY GOD THEYRE LITERALLY MY FAVORITE VOICES EVERY SONG THEY DO IS INCREDIBLE AND OH MY GOD THE MV HAD SHIT RELATED TO AL1 SO NOW IM !!!!!!!!!! BC THE NEXT THING NOW ITS THE COMEBACK AND WITH THAT COMES T E A S E R S IM LIVING GIVE IT ALL TO ME MY BABIES and also joshua is so beautiful i could actually cry, talking about crying of course i cried bc of nuest theyre such incredible people with such good hearts and they deserve everything! they were so nervous about the comeback!! i love my other family, while you were sleeping, getting better i think i dont know i tried to just relax, my stomach is a bit of a mess again.
• 1610: the weather is confusing, tired and sleepy, watching the same youtube channel all day (tbh its been days that im watching mostly that channel), my cr u s h (suddenly i was in a good mood), i need a break from work.
• 1710: im a little ball of stress, STRAY KIDS EP 1 i'll probably go down with another survival show and love way too much but at least its just nine boys right, eating good food that i also couldnt eat, still with the same youtube channel, tired as heck but idk why.
• 1810: well you see i had a shitty night last night and didnt sleep so i thought today was gonna hella shitty BUT it was decent????, my head is a little messed up but im trying to get better doing things that make me laugh and happy, text fics are good to ease your mood also fics in general (fluff its the best bc certain types of angst gets my emotions all over the place), ALSO 3RACHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, and my new books arrived!!!!
• 1910: DO YOU HEAR SOMEONE SCREAMING WHILE ALSO CRYING??????? BC THATS DEFINITELY ME!!!!!!!!!!! N U E S T FUCKING FIRS T WIN I LOVE MY BABIES THEY DESERVE S O M U C H OH MY GOD THEIR FACES WHEN THEY SAID IT IM SO HAPPY THEY COULDNT BELIEVE THEY WERE LITERALLY SPEECHLESS T H IS IS AWESOME LIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT TOOK 2045 DAYS BUT ITS THERE AND NOTHING IS MORE DESERVING THAN ALL OF THIS THAT THEYRE GETTING IM SO PROUD IM SO HAPPY I LOVE THEM TO D E A T H THEYRE FAMILY THEY WERE SOBBING I WAS SOBBING I SCREAMED IN THE CAR WITH MY DAD GOING TO WORK!!!!!!!!!!! MAN THIS FEELS SO S O SO SO GOOD like they were almost disbanding months ago they called produce 101 their last chance and jonghyun talked about how it felt like they have failed and that snake pledis also thought that and look!!!! at them now!!!!!!! winning at music shows and also nominated to awards on mama!!!!!! this is amazing my mood turned so much af ter i saw that (ok i know i wrote so much but like!!! my babies!!! not even sorry bye), but also a few hours after i was so stressed my body was hurting and i ended up with a fever sooooo..., but finishing things!!! (worked so much), i finished all the videos on that youtube channel now im lost, i love fresno???
• 2010: shitty end to a shitty week, throwing up and feeling nausious all day, feeling overall LIKE A PIECE OF USELESS SHIT,my head hurts so much why do migraines exist, but brooklyn nine nine is amazing and i love jake and amy so THERES THAT.
• 2110: shit is complicated, catched up on some kpop stuff, i want this feeling to go away, i love nuest they were in the same place im CRYING, its nice to find something that you find comfort and that makes you feel better when youre feeling down.
• 2210: chill day, slept a lot, read a little, catched up on youtube, im feeling a lot better.
• 2310: it was a really good start for the week, first bc it started with a live from seventeen i love my family, and i finished things at work, but it rained so much and i got so wet my hair is not happy, also i know i probably say this too much but i love nuest SO much????? like a lot i have cried in two months what i havent cried in my whole life combined im gonna go buy pledis bye.
• 2410: fuck this shit.
• 2510: im pretty fucking sure that im sick again, got off work early bc i wasnt feeling well, i stressed about some shit yesterday that in the end i was right and people are dumb and fucked me over TWICE IN A DAY for no reason at all way to go @ caixa, slept a lot bc things suck and i just wanna be healthy again pls im tired, bts run.
• 2610: woke up throwing up, didnt go to work, didnt eat much, didnt SLEEP either, but watched a shit ton of kpop stuff.
• 2710: i tried to go to the doctor and it didnt work welp thats what i get for try to TAKE CARE OF MY HEALTH FOR ONCE, tired as shit of this sickness, finally the week ended, jbj is so fucking funny plssss i love them, watched some stuff.
• 2810: still sick as all fuck, my eyebrows are looking amazing tho, watched some stuffff, going out and seeing friends is good sometimes its nice to see that things dont change, it was a happy day overall.
• 2910: my head is weird im a little scared tbh, i had no patience whatsoever, so i slept most of the day, finally watched stray kids ep 2 i love my talented kidsss, also stranger things.
• 3010: didnt do ANYTHING at work, im in so much pain im tired of all of this shit, the unit (here we go again), and the wrap ups starts!!!, reading a little.
• 3110: bad fucking day, i will never try to go to the doctors again bc it doesnt do anything for my health anyway sooooo, tired and hungry and probably dehydrated bc the only thing that i know how to do is CRY, the only thing that made me smile was seventeen and pentagon, also i read some of my current book.
• 0111: stress man stress is a fucking trick thing, but i managed to eat, the weather was amazing like a little cold but not too much, masterkey is the best thing that korea ever made, im so so so excited and also so confused and curious bc of seventeen and their comeback PLS.
• 0211: relaxing day, finished a book, while you were sleeping is soooo good, will i ever let go of trashy reality tv my guess is nope, i am eating????? shocking news.
• 0311: went to work but got home early and slept for like 3 hours it was great, spending money and regreting it, stranger things, i love stray kids so much honestly if they dont debut as nine im gonna burn jyp stay tuned, i love wanna one so fucking much thooooooo im gonna combust thinking about 2019.
• 0411: sleeping soooo much, i love wanna oneeeeeeee and i love nuestttttttttt im tired of this angst shit with minhyun not interacting with them in public bc people are stupid but my heart was so warm bc of all the interactions between the rest ofwanna one and nuest tho :(((( even jisung and aron!!! which leaves me thinking that everyone talks when theres no cameras!!! and that put my heart at ease, jbj is also so cuteeee theyre the funniest people i love them, my heart is full of love we all can see, i love saturdays i needed to rest so much but my brain is a little meh still.
• 0511: went to sleep at 7am and woke up at 11am it was gReAt but i slept like half of the afternoon soooo, masterkey is honestly so good and ep 4 was THE GREATEST CHANYEOL IS A GENIUS AND THE WHOLE CAST WAS AMAZING THEY WERE ALL SO FUCKING FUNNY, breathed stranger things, my hair is so long i'm impressed, kwon soonyoung.
• 0611: S E V E N T E ENS CO ME BACK I LOVE MY FAMILY WITH MY WHOLE BEING PLEASE THEY NEVER DISAPPOINT THIS SHIT ISNT EVEN POSSIBLE YOU KNOW CLAP IS AMAZING THE SONG THE MV THE COREO E V E R Y TH I NG IM LITERALLY SO AMAZED AND THE ALBUM IS SOOOOOOOO FREAKING GOOD LIKE IF YOU WANT ME TO CLAP IM CLAPING FOREVER THE SOONHOON SONG MAN MA N I NEED SOONYOUNG TO STOP BC IM SUFFOCATED WITH LOVE BUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS SO NICE TO HAVE SOMETHING THAT YOU LOVE SO MUCH AND THAT BRINGS YOU JOY AND HAPPINESS AND THAT SURPRISE YOU IN THE BEST WAYS AND THEYRE ALWAYS IMPROVING AND I LOVE THEM MORE THAN ANYTHING B Y E, welp besides that i had a horrible night of sleep im so tired of shit happening with my body and mind i just need to slow down, alsooo sujus comeback lol so good, paying bills is always fun right, stranger things.
• 0711: im in such a good mood im a little weird out by it but im loving it, but i didnt manage to eat, and i just want to take a time off work but things are still in the way, i listened to so much seventeen WHO IS SURPRISED NO ONE, jyp can rot in hell stray kids is nine or none asshole bye.
• 0811: welp woke up throwing up so theres that and then i couldnt eat properly for the rest of the day of course, ohhh i had a dream with nuest last night i love them i love my 2hyun i miss all of them together :(, didnt have anything to do this shit is boring, i cant believe i spent almost two hours watching stuff with certain group, people that remember of you when they buy a book that they know that you like it!!! im soft.
• 0911: got out of work early, *jonghyuns voice* PIZZAAAAA, slept a lot when i got home it was amazing, i love seventeen more than anything in the world, also i love wanna one so much my heart is conflicted bc of the end of the NEXT year lol.
• 1011: work is so boring pls, i know i said this yesterday but i love seventeen to death they bring me so much joy its nice, also i love minhyun too much tbh also jonghyun i miss my 2hyun everyday :( alsooooo wanna one in general and also nuest in general im made of love, was out of breath bc i laughed so much bc of suju on weekly idol pls theyre so stupid, friends being soft.
• 1111: woke up throwing up again what’s new, such a rainy cozy day, the unit, x men, JONGHYUN IS MY BABY MY PRECIOUS MY EVERYTHING I LOVE HIM SO MUCH IT MAKES ME HAPPY (spend the night watching night goblin).
• 1211: masterkey is always amazing, i love daniel so much my soft little shit, slept a lot, finished stranger things season 2, my head is so fucked up.
• 1311: WANNA ONE COMEBACKKKKKKKKKKKK I LOVE MY KUDSSSSSSS so dramatic the mv tho i cant believe they killed ong like that, it shouldnt be possible for someone to throw up so much like me, boring as all fuck day, got home early from work and slept so much, tired.
• 1411: tbh idk what happened today im feeling like absolutely crap but im trying to pretend that everything is fine, *sigh* people, also i love leticia my little ANGEL IN HUMAN FORM, my sleep is so fucked up and my body and my eating habits but like i said EVERYTHING IS COMPLETELY FINE, reading vlogs for days.
• 1511: im feeling SO weak lmao im like dizzy and i cant be in a standing position not even eat helps thats fucking fantastic and my head is hurting sO BAD, besides that i slept a whole fucking lot, its good to have a day off even if i feel like shit, MY PLEDIS FAMILY ALL TOGETHER ALL 3 ACTIVE GROUPS IN A PICTURE ALSO SEVENTEEN AN NUEST TOKE A PICTURE AND SEVENTEEN CHEERING FOR NUEST AND NUEST AND PRISTIN SITTING TOGETHER AND BOTH OF THEM CHEERING FOR SEVENTEEN MY HEART IS WHOLEEEEEE BUT ITS MISSING A PIECE BC OF MINHYUN THAT WAS THERE BUT BC KFANS ARE ANNOYING HE CANT BE TOGETHER WITH HIS BOYS BYE BUT EVERYONE GOT A AWARD AND NUEST WAS SO HAPPY AND IM HAPPY AND SEVENTEEN GOT THEIR FIRST WIN FOR CLAP AMAZING DAY, kpop makes me happy when my health just gave up on me can you see that.
• 1611: stressed and feeling horrible, my book was STOLEN i seriously have no words and also my bus just didnt passed this shit is PERSONAL NOW MAN, there wasnt a single good thing (besides kpop stuff) good about this month honestly, im tired, need sleep for 3 days straight.
• 1711: went to the doctors!!!!! he didnt ignored what i said!!!! i got a new medication!!!! amazing!!!!!!!!, i was so exhausted tho i think its bc its way too hot, drank soda after two months it was a meh experience, my book that was stolen is now being shipped to me again everything is fine!, it was a better day than yesterday but i didnt do much tbh.
• 1811: my head was a fucking mess, trying not to get stressed, bought my new medicine (what a difficult thing to do), level up! project, the punisher.
• 1911: watched a ton of stuff, chill day, sad that the weekend is over, but it was good for me to rest even if my head was messed up yesterday today was calm? idk, its so fucking hot.
• 2011: im in a good mood!!! like not :DDDDD but :) :D????? idk my mind is at ease, also i ate really well!!!!!, got out of work early, masterkey!!!!!!!!!, bts deserves the world i love them so much.
• 2111: i think i have a cold???? bc when can i be not sick for more than one day RIGHT, chill and rainy day tho, not much to do at work, woozis birthday in korea my genius composer king i love him so muchhhhh, i love minhyun.
• 2211: well i definitely have a cold also i think im so dizzy bc of my new medication i hope this shit ends up soon, i wasnt feeling good at all i was so meh that i couldnt be excited about anything, like the PENTAGON COMEBACK THAT WAS AFUCKINGMAZING hui is seriously so so so so talented i love my kid and also kino his choreographys are so gooooooooooooddddddddddd!!!!! i love my babys so much im sad that my mind was a mess and i couldnt scream enough about this... :( but it was genuinely one of the best comebacks of this year, things finally getting solved at work so yay!!, finished a book.
• 2311: it was very very rainy, sim city is my new favorite thing in the entire world, watched a ton of zoellas vlogs, my mind is a little ? but im trying to calm it down with stuff idk man, also the side effects of the medication are definitely kicking in now maybe its that idk but OH MAN.
• 2411: the day was sooooo slow paced bc i didnt have internet so i couldnt do anything at work even the stuff i do when i have nothing to do it was horrible, but i read almost 100 pages of a harry potter book bc of that, and then!!!!! i decided to go out it was really nice i need this sometimes but its hard to be motivated idk, and man i think i will never get over this boy completely its so dumb but i like him thats it???? im fine but i see him and i!! want!!! him!!! and its so ahhhh like its not hurtful or shit like that its just nice???? idk i never talk about this in dept, ohhhhh and my book that was stolen has now arrived!!!! it was a good day after all.
• 2511: well i slept so much during the day bc i got home at 5am and woke up randomly at 8am it was great, SEVENTEEN PERFORMED I DONT KNOW HONESTLY THEY LOVE ME SO MUCH ITS BEAUTIFULLLLLLL NOW EVERY SONG EXCEPT THE TEEN, AGE ONES ALL HAVESOME KIND OF PERFORMANCE BLESS AND OH MY GOD I DONT KNOW ITS LITERALLY ONE OF MY FAVES THANK YOU SEVENTEEN FOR ALLTHE LOVEAND SUPPORT I APPRECIATE and oh my gooddddddd jun playin the piano!!!!!! the transition from dwc to without you to clap will never fail to amaze me and all that topped off with the transition from i dont know to dwc WITH JUN ON PIANO BOWN DOWN TO TALENT, i didnt do much bc my mind was a mess and when someone from your family drains your mood and energy its hard you know, im thankful to seventeen bc when things are bad i listen to their songs and just that makes my mind slow down and its nice to have something like this in life, ohhhhh and minhyun!!!! with!!!!! seventeen!!!!! and also jihoon with woojin and daniel!!!!!!!!! and minghao with guanlin!!!!!!!!!!!!! and mingyu and daniel!!!!! i love my babies but minhyun with them made my heart so soft i love my pledis family i wish he could talk with nuest too tho :(.
• 2611: my head is a fucking mess when will this stop i need to distract myself constantly bc when i cant everything becomes so shitty, chanyeols birthday in korea i love him so much and i think that that will never change, wanna one go its way to good i love my groupppppp i love daniel hes the fucking softest son and person in general fuck you, night goblin is so nice to watch i love jonghyun to death my little soft strong precious baby, also the punisher is amazing pls i love frank i love david i love karen i love madani i love sam :( i hate billy with all my heart.