Pilot (1.01)

• Sam: "Dude, you gotta update your cassette tape collection." Dean: "Why?" Sam: "Well, for one, they're cassette tapes. And two, Black Sabbath, Motorhead, Metallica?! It's the greatest hits of mullet rock." Dean: "House rules, Sammy. Driver picks the music; shotgun shuts his cake hole." Sam: "You know, Sammy is a chubby twelve-year-old. It's Sam, okay?" Dean: "Sorry, can't hear you. The music's too loud."
• Dean: (holds up hand to stop Sam) "No chick flick moments." Sam: "Alright... jerk." Dean: "Bitch."
• Officer: "So, fake U.S. Marshall. Fake credit cards. You got anything that's real?" Dean: "My boobs."
• Sam: "We got work to do."

Wendigo (1.02)

• Haley: "I don't know how to thank you." (Dean gives her "the look") "Must you cheapen the moment?" Dean: "Yeah!"

Bugs (1.08)

• Real Estate Agent: "We accept home owners of all race, religion, color, or... sexual orientation." Dean: "Right. Um, I'm going to go talk to Larry. Okay, Honey?" (smacks Sam on the butt)

Home (1.09)

• Missouri: "You two have grown up handsome. (looks at Dean) And you were one goofy looking kid."

Scarecrow (1.11)

• Dean: (to scarecrow) "Dude, you fugly."
• Emily: "So what's the plan?" Dean: "I'm working on it." (several hours later) Emily: "You don't have a plan, do you?" Dean: "I'm working on it..."
• Dean: "How'd you get here?" Sam: "I stole a car." Dean: "That's my boy!"

Something Wicked (1.18)

• Sam: "Dude, dude, I'm not using this ID!" Dean: "Why not?" Sam: "Because it says "Bikini Inspector" on it!"

more to come