- hey... been awhile huh
- a lot has happened.
- so much
- i'll do a quick rundown of the summer
- end grade 11, easy win. season 9 of apex rocks.
- say goodbye to nathan last day of school, i wanted to hug him soso bad but couldn't work up the courage (foreshadowing)
- didn't really mind not having jay or connor around, it wasn't lonely especially with my new friends around. i'm happier and lighter
- take pride in who i am as a person, start just being happier in general
- unashamed of my interests
- start wearing crop tops, start being more confident
- wear a two piece swimsuit in public, go swimming in public
- sleep well
- got a job! working at $ store
- i work a lot now. lowering hours soon but saving up for pc
- just. a lot overcoming things. a lot of moving on.
- spend so much time with nathan
- something felt different
- he didn't have a name before but since he's my boyfriend now i figured i should say it
- a literal dream come true
- never in a million years did i think i'd ever be this lucky
- never did i think this would really come to be and i can't explain how thankful i am for it.
- to my past self, it does get better. it gets so so much better.
- ✔ wants to talk to me and i tried but i caught them in a rush i think. i don't really want to know what they have to say but i'm curious. i want them to be guilty. i just want to get at least one to feel bad about what they did, because they should.
- but it doesn't stick to my mind as much as it used to. i've got better things to worry about rather than someone so flaky. rather than someone so... far away
- i feel safe in his arms
- i've never felt so safe before
- it drives me crazy. i feel good finally. finally finally finally. i feel so good. i deserve this i love him i do.
- i feel held even when he is not near
- this is not a type of love i have discovered before
- yes.. i'd say it's been a good 4 months
- yeah :)
oct 7 2021 ∞
oct 7 2021 +