- walking around the outdoor mall, "I just got really scared that someone from work is going to see us together." "I didn't think of that. All it takes is one salesman..." "And everyone will know before 7 on Monday.", running away to a tiny bar to drink Stella Artois
- sitting in my car enjoying the silence
- shaking head to toe while driving home
- pace is the trick
- "You look like Audrey Hepburn!"
- having a giant bowl of thick cinnamon-dashed oatmeal for breakfast
- buying four varieties of coffee at The Fresh Market
- bringing Pam food in the hospital, feeling such a massive weight on my shoulders
- visiting my grandparents and playing with their tiny dog
- speaking to my mother about what's been on my mind
- buying a burr grinder
- making progress on repairing things with Tyler, eating mussels together
- learning that Bob doesn't have cancer, and deciding that was all I needed to make my day good
- painfully awkward and honest conversations
- getting an Italian combo sandwich at Panera, pressed and cut in half
- leather jackets and cinnamon whisky, making out in the backseat with Tyler before the Coheed concert
- going to Wendy's with Bob, discussing healthy food - "ah, so you want me to die from something else." "yes I do."
- drinking Black Velvet on top of an old Mercedes-Benz convertible in an empty warehouse. "I wasn't very rebellious as a teenager, I guess I'm trying to make up for it now."
- driving around with Brad looking for potential apartments to be room mates in
- sitting on the stairs in the warehouse, eye contact and a sudden sentence - "I don't even care what anyone thinks anymore. Let's have fun."
- drinking whisky with John at the dinner table, talking about life and lost love and hopelessness
- "Don't worry. I want you to feel safe."
- alone in the warehouse, monstrosities and mania
- "You're...cool." "Cool? Is that all you've got?" "No, I'd be here all night."
- drunk acupuncture, hanging out in the bathroom on my knees wanting to vomit, John apologizing profusely
- sharing a spinach and chicken salad wrap + organic chocolate frozen yogurt with Bob "This is healthy? I could get used to this."
- "Did you tell your friends about me?" "...A couple." "What did they say?" "Why don't you marry her?"
- "What happens if I fall for you?"
- "And if they don't like it, fuck 'em!", jokingly yelling at each other, our Northern accents popping out, bursting into fits of laughter
- "That was like the first thing you told me. You said 'it's not like we're gonna get married' and now you joke about it an awful lot."
- "I feel like you're the devil and this is some test from God that I'm failing miserably."
- breaking and repairing, uncertainty, an awkward strain in my chest, a sensation of nonononono
- sitting on our couch eating our frozen yogurt. "I don't know what exactly it is that we're doing, but I like it too much to give it up."
- making sandwiches with ham, salami, provolone, lettuce, tomato, and mayo on 5 grain Italian bread, listening to Bob's endless praise
- going shopping with Tyler, reconnecting, finally finding new heels for work
- clinging to Brad from the back of the Harley, all clad in leather, feeling air rush around my face at 60mph
- going shopping with Tyler again, finding tons of new work clothes
- working Saturday in a red dress and black heels, rushing between the cashier's desk and the copy machine, joking with Bob all day about work and stupid people and the mob - "I'm sorry, but you've gotta go."
- eating turkey and salami sandwiches on ciabatta, discussing buying a house, and then "What's gonna happen if I fall in love with you?" "I'll be happy."
- "When we get married, I'm gonna be like, 'I do, and you won, you little bitch!'"
- talking to my father about buying a house and retirement funds while eating a guacamole + veggie wrap on a spinach tortilla
- curling my hair and wearing boots on Sunday, having plans for lunch and the rest of my life
- "It's kind of funny, we both hate everyone EXCEPT each other."
- joking (or maybe not) about getting new jobs and running away to Maryland and never seeing our families again
- sharing cannolis from The Fresh Market
- drinking strawberry kefir while eating a fruit salad of strawberries, blueberries, raisins, and grapes
- Darrin telling Bob, "You should get a twenty year old", Bob and I exchanging laughter and nervous glances
- having a heart-to-heart conversation with Kevin before leaving work, discussing personal happiness and coyotes in the snow
- "He knows everything but he says he knows nothing and we both agreed that you can never tell your dad because he'd kill me. This is a fact because he has a daughter your age and he said that he'd kill me if you were his daughter."
- going out with coworkers, playing designated driver and swearing ourselves to secrecy
- him leaning over to kiss me at the bar, his supervisor shielding his eyes going "No I can't see this"
- "My credit's really bad." "Yeah, you two are gonna have a lot of trouble buying a house when you get married." "Whatever, I'll just put my name on it."
- "I love your hair like that. You have great eyes and high cheekbones and perfect lips."
- "I've never been in love before. You're going to win."
- "Why do you like me?" Trying to explain to him while he fell asleep in the passenger seat next to me, then listening to "Gravity's Union" and softly singing along - "This life I can save."
- sharing a slice of chocolate cake and fruit
- going for a jog, learning how to use my Polaroid Land Model 220
- editing my novel while Tyler read the first 70 pages or so, watching his expression and hearing his reactions at shocking scenes
- baking ciabatta mini rolls while getting two loads of laundry done
- making chicken tacos together with sour cream, lettuce, tomato, black beans, and cheddar
mar 1 2013 ∞
apr 1 2013 +