- sometimes when I or a friend brings up max rejecting me it's either a conversation where I remain in neutral composure about the situation or I feel completely silly.
- I'll feel silly for liking him b/c I get the he was nvr interested in you or he was stringing u along. Both I believe. They sting a bit but I get over it, b/c it's not that srs.
- I also get the well he's your only straight friend. Not tru. I've had straight male friends all my life, and even tho max is the closest I've ever had in terms of a close friendship in my young adult life I know how to function with a male in a friendship and only feel s/t platonic. Tho dnt get me wrong I've def tried seeing them in a romantic sense, but I could nvr b into it honestly cos they're not my type n he n I can only function well as a good friend.
- lastly it makes me feel silly cos it makes me feel like everything I feel for him is all in my head and just me wanting to fill a void. I'm not lonely but I do want to experience a relationship with a boy I like beyond the physical. I nvr intended to like max and I dnt hang out with him solely b/c I have a crush on him. I really like our friendship. It's sweet, fun and every time I'm w him I learn s/the new. I definitely consider him one of my best friends from school. I'll admit he does havesome sort of hold on me, cos I cnt shake him (maybe in time I will), but I def know there are others out there, but no one interesting has come intoomy life and it just seems so easy with Max cos I feel like we work even tho we're so different. I adore him and love him dearly as a friend and this is why I'm okay with being rejected by him b/c I honestly wish I could only feel for him in a platonic sense.
- the rejection didn't hurt my feelings, but it felt like a relief to tell l him how I felt. I didn't have any expectations for it so w/e happens happens and I wasn't sad. I do wish he didn't leave me in a gray area and I wish he nvr kissed me and I wish that I was firm in my rejection of it.
- I do like that he kissed me on the forehead as held me in our embrace (a hug) I still get tingly when I replay it in my head. Because he was so moved by my confession.
jul 23 2015 ∞
jul 23 2015 +
jul 23 2015 +