season one

• 1.03 Health Care • is it because you know I love count chocula?
• 1.04 the Alliance ♥ absolutely I do
• 1.05 Basketball • I think I'll see you at the mall
• 1.06 Hot Girl • the schrutes produce very thirsty babies

season two (all of them)

• 2.01 the Dundies ♥ the ice melts & it's like, second drink!
• 2.02 Sexual Harassment • what has two thumbs & hates todd packer? this guy!
• 2.03 Office Olympics ♥ those are the doves
• 2.04 the Fire ♥ ryan started the fiyah!
• 2.05 Halloween • I would blow my brains out
• 2.06 the Fight • assistant to the sensei
• 2.07 the Client ♥ dwigt
• 2.08 Performance Review • I guess I missed you
• 2.09 Email Surveillance • jesus drank wine
• 2.10 Christmas Party • happy birthday, jesus, sorry your party's so lame
• 2.11 Booze Cruise ♥ I would save the receptionist
• 2.12 the Injury ♥ huggy hugs!
• 2.13 the Secret • how many different ways are there to sniffle?
• 2.14 the Carpet • go get yourself a monkey kidney
• 2.15 Boys & Girls ♥ they don't even make houses like that in scranton
• 2.16 Valentine's Day • happy valentine's day, darling. love, bob vance, vance refrigeration
• 2.17 Dwight's Speech • I'd say he will have a fun weekend in philadelphia
• 2.18 Take Your Daughter to Work Day • my theory is —
• 2.19 Michael's Birthday ♥ luke, this is your father. come set the table for dinner
• 2.20 Drug Testing ♥ those are the rules of jinx & they are unflinchingly rigid
• 2.21 Conflict Resolution • sort of an expert at photoshop
• 2.22 Casino Night ♥ 1 7&7 with 8 maraschino cherries, sugar on the rim, blended if you can

season three (all of them)

• 3.01 Gay Witch Hunt • false. I do not miss him
• 3.02 the Convention ♥ dwight got a hooker!
• 3.03 the Coup ♥ I know you like their earrings
• 3.04 Grief Counseling ♥ all of us kind of in the audience of what happened
• 3.05 Initiation • it felt far
• 3.06 Diwali • I kind of thought something would happen tonight, too
• 3.07 Branch Closing ♥ how did we do it? I don't understand
• 3.08 the Merger • that's always a thing that makes people happy
• 3.09 the Convict • atwhay oday ouyay inkthay, ampay?
• 3.10 a Benihana Christmas ♥ jim, take new years away from stanley
• 3.11 Back from Vacation • the days inn room 228 was starting to get really depressing
• 3.12 Traveling Salesmen ♥ I guess he just really likes her a lot
• 3.13 the Return • how was your gaycation?
• 3.14 Ben Franklin • boxers, briefs, or pantaloons?
• 3.15 Phyllis' Wedding • I saw "wedding crashers" accidentally
• 3.16 Business School ♥ but jim, this garlic bread is cold
• 3.17 Cocktails • I want the ketchup fights & the tickling & the giggling
• 3.18 the Negotiation • it was a weird day. I accidentally cross-dressed
• 3.19 Safety Training • dwight, you ignorant slut
• 3.20 Product Recall • I don't have a headache. I'm just preparing
• 3.21 Women's Appreciation ♥ got penises on the brain
• 3.22 Beach Games ♥ I've been trying to be more honest lately
• 3.23 the Job • are you free for dinner tonight?

season four

• 4.01 & 02 Fun Run • I didn't see where it started but I saw where it ended
• 4.03 & 04 Dunder Mifflin Infinity • can we speak privately about our relationship?
• 4.05 & 06 Launch Party • who said I didn't see it? did jim say that I didn't see it? I saw it!
• 4.07 & 08 Money ♥ we will be requiring a bed time story
• 4.09 Local Ad ♥ break me off a piece of that fancy feast! nailed it
• 4.10 Branch Wars • for the record, a certain scranton salesman approached me, ok?
• 4.11 Survivor Man ♥ I will let harm befall him. I will even let him die. but I will never let him lose his dignity
• 4.12 the Deposition • you never expect to get screwed by your girlfriend
• 4.13 Dinner Party ♥ the thought of popping one of your beets into my mouth makes me want to vomit
• 4.14 Chair Model • when it happens, it's going to kick your ass, beesly. so, stay sharp
• 4.15 Night Out ♥ oh my god, mom, I gotta go. one of my friends is getting beaten up by some girls
• 4.18 & 19 Goodbye, Toby • if the devil were to explode, and evil were gone forever, what sort of party would you have?