if i were to tell you "my story"... you will see the world oh so differently.

• i fully do not understand who i am.
  • born with a cynical taste on life.
  • distorted.
  • a dreamer.
  • a procrastinator.
• breathe fashion. my style defines me.
• value a few friends over lots of acquaintances.

i hate being told what to do. i get my way.

• i isolate myself to find out who i am, and in the end with no one else around me.. i still don't know. i remain a stranger to myself.
• playing the role of the stoic one, but in reality i am so much less.

i have a loud voice, and even louder opinions. so if i don't like you i most likely will tell you that to your face.

• i always walk like i know where i’m going but really i have no idea.
• i keep wandering around, doing nothing, even if i have a shitload to do.
• my imagination never failed me while all other senses did.

i am lazy. i need an asskick deluxe. i have no motivation and i obviously need my pills.

• i have absolutely no self-control whatsoever.
• i hate second-guessing myself.

i can't stand fake people. wannabes & gossip addicts. people that are dishonest & immature. hypocrites. mindless, superficial, "cool" people with their life philosophy as: "clubbing is my religion, baby". those that fail to think for themselves and just blindly follow the rest. i tend to ignore those that fit in any of the above categories.

true, i've had my share of eating disorders (still do) but just as much as i care about the way i look, i can't fucking stand all the bitches that keep on going about weight and dieting like 24/7! feel good about yourself. it's all about confidence. eat well. make sure you're healthy before all. and shut the fuck up, you don't need to publicize your new pathways to an inflated ass!

• i cannot take criticism very well.

i don't give a fuck what people think of me. i let them think what they want. if they just care enough to bother with what i do then, i’m already better than them anyway.

• i have yet to figure out the purpose of my existence and feel as though there is no answer out there for me.
• i've led such a sheltered life, that i feel like i haven't really lived at all.

i keep waiting for happiness to begin, i’m deluding myself again.

• i've always been indecisive and i can't stand not having a set plan for myself. i try to let go and let things flow as they like, but my mind just won't allow it.
• i enjoy the memories, but i wish i were living them.
• timing is everything. and i happen to have the worst of luck with that.
• the strive to constantly question, challenge, think too far, and rebel against that which is mundane seems to be innate within me. ambition it's an evil thing.
  • my blood absolutely boils when i witness girls crying over guys. i cannot stand it! i hate when girls that can't grow up and move on, there is more to life than your stupid youth group.
• patience is a virtue. but sometimes i just need to fast forward.

i can't think of what it would be like not having those certain people in my life. sometimes i wonder what would have happened if i veered into another direction. it's the people in your life that really shape who you are.

• i have terrible addictions.
• i'm bad news baby.

i dream, dance manically when out in clubs/bars/in my room, draw and write my dreams down on scraggy scraps of paper and collect them altogether, desperately trying to collaborate some form of order.

if i could run away believe me i would have done by now, i just have not had the energy required to run.

i've literally died twice before. yes, i am quite the miracle indeed.

• aging freaks me the fuck out.
• my souls heavy and old. lived far too fast. and so my youth fades to this nothingness i have become.