So, my problem:

I feel like I developed my personality later in life, later than most people because I was alone a lot during middle school & high school due to being an only child and shy - not being able to let myself hang out with people. So I really learned about my personality in college and when I had my first boyfriend.

Now, it seems like my problem lies in being confident with that new found personality and keeping consistent in my personality, feeling comfortable to bring it out in all situations, like being a leader for a group and being in a relationship. Moreover, I want to be able to keep a position with authority and keep a relationship going, which i realize both falter when I'm not confident consistently.