• Bye, Grandma!
  • "I'll be back real soon." "Well, I'll be dead real soon."
  • "YOUR SISTER'S DEAD! FUCKING GET OVER IT! IT'S BEEN LIKE EIGHT SECONDS!"

• Dan, genuinely: "What is updog?"

• Hammerhead sharks... The most viscous of them all. As long as you don't startle them, you should have nothing to WORRY ABOUT!!!

• MARK ZUCKERBERG!!!

• RED PLANT, BLUE PLANT, PURPLE PLANT

• This is the thing you choose to gaslight me over?! / Arin's favorite album 'Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness' by The Smashing Pumpkins

• ARIN: Oh, he doesn't want lemonade anymore... DAN: Yeah, because you hit him with a HAMMER!