Physically:

• Eyes
• Handsome as opposed to pretty
• Physically fit
  • I like me some washboard abs, okay?!
• No tattoos or piercings
  • I can live with small tattoos, but not in weird places like a tramp stamp or anything, and I guess ear piercings are okay but anything down there is a most definite no
• Short hair. If it reaches down to his shoulders, I'm looking in the other direction.

Everything else:

• Must be outgoing enough to get me out of my shell but not too outgoing
• Good sense of humor
  • Must find Arrested Development, Better Off Ted, and Robot Chicken funny
• Can't be an artist
• Good hygiene
• Neat
• Can't be a smoker and he certainly can't love to drink excessively
  • This also means no drugs, but that should be a given