the importance of fun

• fun is important for our happiness and also good for our health
• not everything we do in our free time is really fun
• 3 components of true fun:
  • playfulness (game-like nature, not for achievement)
  • connection (being with other people, sharing experiences)
  • flow (true immersion, passionate involvement)
• regular "funterventions" - planned fun activities
• first-level fun (immidiately fun) vs. second-level fun (...)
• exercise: looking for delights in your life (every day!)

3 pillars of happiness (Dr. Rangan Chatterjee)

• alignment (life/actions - values/personality)
• contentment
• (feeling of) control
• pic

your inner voice/critic

• train it to be kind/empathetic instead of critical
• see also fixed mindset vs. growth mindset
• being overly harsh with ourselves does not help, it actually prevents action/growth/sucess (instead: freeze/procrastination/giving up)
• instead we should be encouraging and kind to ourselves
• exercise: speak to yourself in you-form as if to a friend or child
• exercise: imagine your inner critic has a really funny voice (Mickey Mouse...) - don't take it too serious
• exercise: try to find out how your inner critic(anxiety/anger/...) is trying to help you
• exercise: add the word "yet" to your negative thoughts about yourself (e.g. "I can't do this yet")

being kind to yourself

• exercise: write down 5/10 things you like about yourself or that you are proud of, try to always expand on it

decrease social stress

• when someone does something that annoys you or makes you feel bad: imagine their "hero story" - what could their (best) reasons be to act like this? (it doesn't matter if it's real, but you feel less stressed/bad about it)

your values

• exercise: imagine you are dying, what are the things you wish you had done or spent more time on? derive concrete habits from these goals (e.g. having dinner with your family every day without phone/distractions)

money

• buy experiences - will create happier memories, savouring and won't get you saving for an even-slightly-better-thing
• make it a treat - by jumping to every purchase you (think you) want, you're just getting yourself used to everything and slipping into wanting more, instead really wait for it and enjoy it (like kids on Christmas)
• buy time - if time is money (and if you can afford it), hire help with cleaning and buy yourself time to do what you like (or simply work fewer hours)
• invest in others - people have built-in altruism, we love knowing our money (including the taxes we have to pay anyway) will help others (the more directly we see the positive impact, the better), doesn't apply if we feel forced to spend money on someone(e.g. Christmas presents)