- hey look everybody, sherlock homo is here to solve the case of the gay sweater! -liz lemon
- lemon, women your age are more likely to be mauled at the zoo than get married. -donaghy
- yo, kenneth, im gonna use this whole kitchen area as my bathroom. spread the word. -tracy jordan
- kenneth parcel....would you take this ring?... and sell it in the jewish part of midtown and use the money to get ourselves a nintendo wii. -tracy jordan
- jonathon: sir, jerry seinfeld is here to see you! jack: you told me he was in europe! does he look upset? jonathon: he looks the way you did when i tried to hold your hand on the jet. jack: stall him for a few minutes, jonathon while i try to get my ducks in a row...
- if need be, i will marry myself! yeah, chocolate rain, i will. -liz lemon
- don't do it, Liz lemon. i know what me and kenneth have looks perfect on the outside, but its work, dammit! its work! -tracy jordan
- what are we, back in college freshman year? "lets go to the common room and talk about apartheid" -donaghy
- do you smell maple syrup? dont worry lemon, its probably not a chemical attack. its probably just a strange wind paterncoming over those factories on staten island where food flavors are made. -donaghy
- sweet peaches, what have i done? uncle butch was right, im just a sweet country bumpkin with great skin and soft hands. -kenneth
- "these verizon wireless phones are so popular i accidentally switched mine with an acquaintance." -jack. "well sure cause that verizon wireless service is just unbeatable. if i saw a phone like that on tv, i would be like, where is my nearest retailer so i can get one? ...can we have our money now?" -liz
- stop eatin people's old french fries, pidgeon, have some self respect! don't you know you can fly? -tracy jordan
- no thats not a thing, you cant be gay for just one person... unless youre a lady and you.. meet ellen. -liz lemon.
- and they hate my grampa because they keep being like, kill whitey! and im like, who do you think you are, alcohol? -kenneth
- okay ENOUGH! how long we gonna talk about that stupid award! we got more important things to think about, like where are the french fries i did not ask for? you guys gotta anticipate me! okay forget it, i can't rehearse today. -tracy jordan
- i spent two days makin that movie for my homie and what did i get? a million dollars, a yellow bentley and NOTHING! i never win anything! look at this coffee cup my kids got me for father's day: [world's number 4 dad]. -tracy jordan
- and a very special blonde lady: shelley long youre truly an inspiration to me, i know dat! -tracy jordan
- i dont drink coffee, mr jordan, i dont drink hot liquids of any kind. thats the devil's temperature. -kenneth
- heey! slow down there, ken! coffee's not like alcohol, it's pretty addictive!-tracy jordan
- i love how it makes me feel! its like my heart is trying to hug my brain! -kenneth.
feb 2 2009 ∞
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feb 2 2009 +