Will Not

• Talk badly of my mother
  • Let anyone else talk badly of my mother
• Put clothes on animals
• Write the same word twice - 'had had'
• Use the word 'gotten'
• Wear heels and makeup each day
• Get anything pieced other than ears
  • And even then, probably not those again
• Wear skinny or low-ride jeans
• Put a kid on a leash
• Put a kid in a 'cute' outfit
  • Because they're not usually cute outfits

Do Not

• Smoke
• Drink
• Do Drugs
• Think anything less of anyone who does one, two, or all three of the above
  • Unless they do so in circumstances they shouldn't
• Swear around children
• Pretend to like someone when I don't
• Use special wrapping paper or cards on family. It's expensive and gets thrown out within a few minutes. Brown paper or newspaper shall suffice
• Try to guess the spelling of people's name