real facts about me, as stated by other people

• a real walking shitpost
• "that's ominous, but so is everything that comes out of your mouth"
• the very bottom of chaotic good without crossing into neutral
• literally an eldritch horror in disguise
• living incarnation of thirst
• "i feel like if i needed to become a monk, you would be the person i would go to who would know how to be a monk offhand."
• "your sheer existence is an attack on my peace of mind."
• "I BROKE AN 8BALL AS A CHILD AND IT LANDED ON OUTLOOK NOT SO GOOD AND YOU WERE THE SOLE REASON"