- I do not breathe in. The air is clean and cold and there's so many trees— honey, just open your mouth— and I do not breathe in. I can hold my breath like the world's a swimming pool. I know how to hold; until my lungs ache; until every second elapses like a year, big long spaces———————just like this——————because it feels nice not to breathe and I like the way my lungs constrict. Big python snakes all around. I can hold on. Hold on until the cliff edge starts to crumble under my fingers and I'm screaming God, give me a break, let it break let it fall let me break so I hold on until all that air's exhaled. Hold on until I am holding on to nothing and I am falling but don't I enjoy the fall———God——————————— how I enjoy——————————————the fall. Pure exhilaration when you've stopped holding on and you're tumbling through dead air and this is why I don't breathe in, there are no trees and you are mistaken, we are all so mistaken, but isn't it nice to fall? Isn't it nice not knowing when you'll hit the ground? Isn't it nice to have the comfort of the ground even if it never comes, even if you black out midway and —————————————dark stars bloom in your vision —————————————and your lungs are blooming, look, the trees are flowering in your lungs————————————look, honey, I told you there were trees, I told you——————————and then————I do not breathe in—————————— and it is a blackout.
jul 20 2025 ∞
jul 20 2025 +