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ｓｏｒｔｅｄ　ｂｙ　ｗｏｒｄ　ｃｏｕｎｔ

  • after hours | office / modern setting!au, explicit, 50k+

it’s chilly enough outside the bar that mu qing regrets not wearing a jacket; he folds his arms in front of his chest as he stands close to feng xin, leaning over his phone’s screen as he pulls up the ride sharing app. he’s close enough to see the fine stitching on the lapel of feng xin’s jacket, and close enough to catch the faint trace of a floral cologne clinging to him.

feng xin hesitates with the app open rather than typing a destination address.

“if you want,” he says after a second, “you could come back to my place.”

-

mu qing is starting a new job, and takes his mind off the stress via a one night stand with a handsome man he meets at a bar. he doesn't expect to meet him again at work the next day.

no ever sees him. he has taken down officials of the upper court, too. many of them are obscure to begin with. weak, in comparison. many count for nothing. just don’t do it all at once and get moving right after. he never takes on the big names, the faces he has recollection of. but then he rarely recognizes anyone when he makes his rounds. they may well be faceless, these small gods. of them there are so many. when he was a god he made rounds often, though his hunting grounds were never this wide. he rarely looked at other gods. he would not know their faces.

but he knows mu qing.

— — — the four calamities are a plague-bringer, an infiltrator, a ghost king, and a joke. general xuan zhen is about to discover that there is one more.

after feng xin accidentally steals his first kiss on new year's eve, mu qing finds himself handing over all of his other firsts to feng xin, too. it doesn't mean anything, they're barely even friends. he just needs to get this newfound and distracting desire to touch feng xin out of his system once and for all. or twice... or several times that mu qing certainly isn't counting.

mu qing’s go-to solution for situations like these is violence, simply because he hadn’t learnt about the concept of “talking about our feelings” until he was too old to make it a habit. however, in most situations like these, he’d been raring to go the moment he’d laid eyes on feng xin, for some reason. today is not like one of these situations, with all the built-up tension from the unwanted attention.

“mu qing, why the fuck—are you crying?”

when feng xin reconnects with his childhood friend xie lian, after more than ten years, he doesn’t expect how much he’s changed. co-owner of a tattoo shop, a shady and vaguely unsettling boyfriend, and a colorful collection of friends.

he doesn’t expect xie lian’s business partner and best friend. he’s covered in tattoos and has a terrible attitude, and feng xin finds him fascinating and infuriating.

their first meeting goes terribly. it just goes downhill from there. until it doesn’t.

“i think we should break up.”

feng xin timed it so that mu qing wasn’t eating or drinking but mu qing didn’t react beyond raising an eyebrow. “break up?”

“uh, yeah, because...” how are you supposed to tell someone that you don’t think they’re happy anymore? that you're in love with them and that they only see you as a casual thing? mu qing was stressed and he never let feng xin meet his mom and he never moved in. mu qing hated when feng xin said i love you, actually; he’d get tense and change the subject. the one time feng xin had tried to talk about marriage, he’d said let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

“fine.”

--

feng xin and mu qing break up. turns out they're not very good at staying apart.

feng xin should be absolutely repulsed at the idea. it’s mu qing. mu qing, who is somehow both way below feng xin’s standards and entirely out of his league. mu qing, the absolute worst person that feng xin knows, the bane of his existence, the one person that knows just how to get under feng xin’s skin with a single well-timed insult.

mu qing, who saved his life once. mu qing, who gets a glint in his eye every time feng xin rises to his bait. mu qing, with his stupidly soft looking hair that he’s always curling behind his ears, and his stupid beautiful eyebrows and perfect facial structure and stupid lip gloss that he always wears that feng xin thinks must taste like strawberries, because it leaves his lips looking shiny and soft and annoyingly plush and pink and ripe, and mu qing’s stupid hands with the always perfect nail polish and the way they’re cold to the touch when he brushes against feng xin, and-

feng xin looks down. the napkins are soaked with soy sauce.

it happens once. they both agree that it shouldn't happen again.

it happens again. and again. and again.

he’s the peacock of peacocks, i tell ya! that guy's neck is so slender he practically looks like a swan. he's got little kitty cat eyes, too—the kind that flutters all cutesy-like when he's scheming but turns sharp as a dagger in an instant when you make him mad. that's mu qing all right. a total piece of work.

feng xin recounts how he came to realize his feelings towards mu qing.

hello, i'm calling to inform you that your child has been involved in a serious matter. it will need addressing immediately. please come to the principal's office as soon as you are available. we apologise for any inconvenience this may cause.

-----

five times nan feng and fu yao are called to the principal's office because of their misbehaviour, plus one time it was because of someone else.

“what do you want?” his voice was a hoarse whisper, shaking at the edges.

“i cannot save general xuan zhen but i can help you in saving him.” she said, as she bent over a bit as if to check mu qing and took a step back when feng xin shielded him from her, face skeptical but exhausted.

“what is it?” feng xin burst the bubble of hope that threatened to form in his chest; if centuries of living with mu qing taught him anything, it was to be wary of everything and be distrustful of everything that eats and breathes.

“i can send you back to what you think is the most painful part of your past to make things right, which will help in preventing this tragedy altogether. for him. ” the cultivator explained as feng xin listened on, his hand cupping mu qing’s face, softly touching his cheeks and checking him every few seconds as he did so.

feng xin didn’t say anything for a moment.

some color returns to the back of feng xin’s neck and he sucks his teeth in reproach, “mu qing, will you drop it? i’ve told you already it’s not your problem.”

“don’t make that decision for me!” mu qing’s voice gets louder, “what’s with all the secrecy? what, are you dying?”

feng xin’s lips tighten into a thin line as his eyes drift down to the floor.

or, feng xin's dying and mu qing wants to save him.

he never thought he would discuss the man of his dreams with the man of his dreams; it's all very surreal. sue him for being nervous. "hm. i guess—i guess i like my men, um, handsome. dark hair. devoted—" he thinks of feng xin by xie lian's side for years, defending him hotly from people who laughed at him openly and spat out jealous, vile allegations— "loyal to a fault. deeply protective of those he loves and indifferent to those he doesn't." jian lan. cuo cuo. xie lian. the words come stumbling out of his mouth. "loves like he doesn't know anything else. doesn't feel anything else. the kind of man, who if you had the honor to be loved by him, would do it as effortlessly as breathing."

feng xin pointedly stares at him, and for once, mu qing can't tell what emotion is on his face. "it sounds like you already have someone in mind.”

or mu qing and feng xin get stuck in a pit. a few truths come out.

“a-xin,” there is a deep grief in mu qing’s words, lips curling up in shattered irony. “you win.”

the air is still.

win? feng xin does not feel like a winner. he is losing, he is losing, and there is nothing victorious about this moment; a god sitting in the dirt, stained with blood, biting back tears as life takes and takes and takes.

“don’t die.” mu qing tells him, words wry, but his lips are twisted, and a few silent tears whisper down his cheeks. feng xin has not seen mu qing cry in over 800 years. he cannot breathe.

mu qing’s eyes close.

mu qing does not get up again.

(or: mu qing does not make it out of mount tong'lu, and feng xin falls apart.)

mu qing picks up the boxes of food set aside for him, grateful for the out as he heads back up to the second floor. a little voice following him as he goes.

“that guy? psh, he hardly likes me, we all know he’s here mostly for you.” feng xin said to xie lian once, his laugh coming off haughty.

mu qing rolls his eyes as he steps back into the guest bedroom with his silhouettes, snorting.

“you were wrong, i did. more than you ever knew.”

--

or the one where mu qing is in heaps of trouble.

“you like me.” he sounds incredibly smug about it.

“oh my god.” mu qing groans in exasperation and squirms, trying to move out from where feng xin has trapped him. feng xin doesn’t budge and though he probably could get him off if he really tried. he crosses his arms and attempts a glare up at him instead.

“you do like me, don’t you.” it's less of a question and more of proud statement.

“don’t ask dumb questions.”

(or: mu qing and feng xin decide to fake a relationship as fu yao and nan feng to better disguise themselves from xie lian, many gay shenanigans ensue.)

his thoughts are interrupted by a crash at the door, xie lian falling through a hastily drawn distance shortening array, clutching a set of papers like his life depends on it. maybe it does, xie lian has always had the unlucky trait of trouble following his every step.

“feng xin,” xie lian says, breathless, “feng xin, mu qing left us letters.”

“what-” he starts, xie lian pushes past him, laying the papers on the table.

“mu qing he- he left us letters, feng xin.” he smiles, something happy and uncontrollable and full of longing, “they go all the way back to xianle, feng xin, feng xin he left us letters.”

or, mu qing dies, feng xin and xie lian are left to pick up the pieces.

“no. fuck you.” mu qing points a finger at feng xin’s chest. all his rage radiates outwards, too expansive to be contained within his body. “the sheer stupidity you exude made me come all the way out here looking like this to tell you to your face that i cannot believe, in the vast history of the world, that a person so positively asinine was birthed by some hapless mother.”

feng xin gapes. satisfaction floods mu qing. the feeling vanishes when he sees the look in feng xin’s eye, equal parts glazed over and darkened. it’s so far from mu qing’s intent that he has no choice but to be affronted.

then feng xin says, “you want to fuck about it?” and mu qing blanks.

reasonably, the answer should be no. mu qing will not go home and fuck a near-stranger. more importantly, he will not squander his morals to have sex with someone so stupid he was forced to chew him out face to face.

“idiot,” mu qing says. “where’s your car?”

-

mu qing will not go on a date with a stranger, fuck a stranger, or have a breakdown in a stranger's bathroom after failing to succeed in the previous two. feng xin is the absolute worst.

mu qing. m. 45.

looking for dicks seven inches or more. only requirements are frequent sti testing and good hygiene. i’ll bring the condoms and pick the place.

the topic of sex never interested him. he sees it as a necessary process in many couples, he enjoys the problems that they cause in other mortals who are unable to control their instincts or the exasperation of feng xin every time he hears a lady's prayer asking for male vitality for her husband at nan yang palace. he never thought beyond that, never cared for unnecessary detail, and although he knows the dynamics, pays little attention to it.

it's not for him. his cultivation path was simple in that regard. he had no temptations to divert him from his goal, neither man nor woman managed to provoke sutras. not even feng xin, not in that aspect.

that was the problem. not even feng xin.

. .

or how mu qing fears that his lack of interest in sex will destroy his recent relationship with feng xin, he makes a mess, but feng xin clears it up with very little finesse

mu qing grips his brush tight, and with careful hands he writes on his paper, swift and clear. he does not allow his hands to shake, despite the feeling that flutters like swirling leaves right below his lungs; this moment is special, and it is the most important thing that mu qing has done in weeks, and it must be perfect.

he does not hesitate. he has thought about what he wants to write for months now, between scrubbing and sweeping and dressing his highness with gentle fingers.

please give me a friend.

his own handwriting reads up at him, smooth and innocent on the paper. mu qing trembles, breath caught in his throat as he looks down at his own words.

(or: 5 times mu qing lit a lantern for feng xin and one time feng xin did for mu qing <3)

mu qing’s name stares at him from the bright screen. below lies a short profile with the bare necessity of information — age, location, a single sentence about what he’s looking for (not just a fuck). in a normal dating app, this would be enough to prowl the depths of desperate souls within the phone.

and yet, one more box lies empty. what do you hate?

a lot, says one part of mu qing’s mind while the other echoes, nothing important.

---

xie lian insists mu qing try online dating with an app geared towards meeting people who hate similar things. mu qing hates feng xin. but he doesn't have the app, so it's not like he'll find out.

mu qing grits his teeth and tries to push himself to sit up. his head swims, his joints screaming at him.

feng xin grabs him, his fingers digging into mu qing's arms.

"what the fuck happened?" feng xin asks.

he takes hold of mu qing's face and turns it towards him.

the pain vanishes.

mu qing ends up cursed. feng xin helps.

“i’ve had a whole lot of experience of you being a fucking annoyance. if i didn't love you, i wouldn't have stuck around for this long. lucky for you," he leans back, bops mu qing's nose, and revels in the way his eyes go cross-eyed, "i've loved you for so long i don't know how else to feel."

in which mu qing is feng xin's favorite.

feng xin is hit with a horny curse, and now mu qing, as the medical cultivator of the sect, must take care of his symptoms. in a purely professional capacity, of course.

mu qing is a closeted freak and feng xin accidentally opens mu qing's very personal package.

“so where do you want to do this?” feng xin asks, pulling off the uniform cap and running a hand through his tousled brown hair.

mu qing blinks. “do… what?”

“don’t act all shy about it. are you trying to blow me for free pizza or not?”

-

in which mu qing, delivery boy for xuan zhen pizza palace, orders pizza from nan yang famous extra hot pizza to annoy his rival delivery boy. unfortunately, he doesn’t have any money to pay for it.

mu qing and feng xin are getting married, and everyone is excited about it! there's only one small problem: one groom and their mutual best man are missing and no one is answering texts.

oh, and there are also chickens. so many chickens.

  • needy | post-canon / curses, teen, 4k+

mu qing is cursed into transforming into a cat. hua cheng attempts to help, but mu qing doesn’t really appreciate his addition to his situation.

the first time feng xin heard mu qing sing was an accident.

or in which mu qing has several talents.

feng xin had a secret admirer who sent him flowers every week. and, mu qing? mu qing was tired of them.

it ends when feng xin walks out, uncharacteristically quiet, the door slamming shut behind him.

mu qing, aren't you tired?

feng xin breaks up with mu qing.

at least, that's what mu qing thinks.

[12:34]

fx: fuck you

[12:35]

mq: fuck me yourself coward /j

or

of feng xin's misery and an excessive use of tone indicators.

jun 3 2022 ∞
jun 3 2022 +
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