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｀ヽ｀、ヽ shower me with cats and dogs｀、ヽ｀☂ヽ｀、

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ｓｏｒｔｅｄ　ｂｙ　ｗｏｒｄ　ｃｏｕｎｔ

it's simple:

shigeru needs to help secure an alliance for his family.

kentarou needs to keep his home from being destroyed.

the solution of marrying each other, however, turns out to be anything but simple.

  • room to grow | fake/pretend relationship!au, general, 50k+

kyoutani and yahaba have enough on their minds in third year, as ace and captain of the volleyball team, butting heads both on and off the court while trying to improve their game so the team has a shot of winning this year. when they find a puppy abandoned in a park, their lives only get even more complicated.

people don't talk to kyoutani if they don't have to. and people certainly don't ever ask kyoutani for help. which is why it's so weird when someone does, and so funny because of all the people in the world to ask him for help it's yahaba.

kiyoko and kyoutani's parents are trying to set up an omiai, and kyoutani asks yahaba to be his fake boyfriend to get out of it. what could possibly go wrong?

“raids are routine work,” kyoutani tells to yahaba before he can air the question. “sometimes there is no sleep done until we accomplish something, say kill a certain ghoul. i guess they’re still going through the possibility that people in the accident are still alive huh?”

yahaba quirks a smile, pushing his mask up his head.

“you’re alive.”

kyoutani looks at him intently and all of the things that they’ve gone through for the past month seems to flash in his mind.

“yes i am.”

  • sixteen | football player/cheerleader!au, explicit, 13k+

this, is just your cliche love story.

this, is how the football star and the hot cheerleader fell deep, deep down the rabbit hole.

this, is how yahaba gained his favorite number.

“second first impressions are everything,” oikawa smiles. “it could’ve been worse. what if you puked on him? there’d be no way to come back from that.”

shigeru’s only mildly satisfied when iwaizumi does them all a favour by smacking oikawa.

there’s a short pause and yahaba sets down his violin, making everyone look at him. he steps forward, right in front of kyoutani again and deliberately grabs his hand, gentle and encouraging and kyoutani feels himself freeze.

yahaba’s smile is blinding, eyes sparkling with excitement.

“you come too.”

in the spring of his sixteenth year, the world fills with music again.

kyoutani returns home, after he and his dragon left the formation a year ago. yahaba struggles to deal with it.

he really should have seen this coming, but he didn't want to.

she might be able to accept it, but kyoutani isn't. then again, he never will be.

people always thought kentarou was a delinquent because he had tattoos curling up and down his arms and his back. if they looked closer, they would see that the tattoos shifted, moved, and came to life with every emotion that flitted across his face or through his heart.

instead, there’s hushed tones and trembling voices and the glimmer of tears caught in silver lashes. he thinks and thinks and thinks a little harder, remembers the texts that went unanswered, the dates cancelled last-minute, the laughs that sounded a little too forced and the smiles that never quite reached his eyes and suddenly the answer is right there, hovering in the space between them like something tangible and kentarou wonders how he never noticed it until now.

prompt: person a goes to see the museum of broken relationships for kicks, recognizes one of the items as a gift they gave to person b before they broke up

feelings are definitely a thing he’s having. kyoutani is really sweet. he’s family oriented and he prefers novels with female leads and he’s in all honors classes. he kind of has a big head, totally has a big smile, definitely has a big heart. his eyes are nice, he’s got that dimple. yahaba groans and rubs his fists into his eyes.

yahaba shigeru has an oath as a medic to always lend help to those in need. well, that oath just got him a bit of a weird situation at home with this specific patient called kentarou.

kyoutani usually spends his birthdays alone with his family and his dog, but his sister was having none of that this year.

shigeru is quickly hurtling toward the point where he’s going to have to change the relationship that he’s built with kyoutani in ways that he can’t take back, and it’s one of the reasons that he isn’t particularly looking forward to his birthday.

no matter how he feels, shigeru knows he can’t afford to be in love. or at least, he can’t afford to act on it.

the internet isn’t a really good substitute for friends, but what can he say? he likes screens and people presumably thousands of miles away better than people yammering in his ears.

“you’re like, what, a fucking snow white now?”

yahaba looks up from where he is engaged in the semi-worrying number of birds that are currently trying to perch (nest?) on multiple parts of his body. “so, what can you do?”

at that moment, a crow chooses to dive down to join yahaba’s little party, giving kyoutani a face full of feathers as it shoots past. in that same instance, kyoutani monotonously recites, “a crow’s brain-to-body ratio is equivalent to that of a chimpanzee’s, and not that far off from a human’s.” then: “fuck!”

“holy shit,” yahaba breathes, because this is gold.

it is 5:45 am, on june 1st, in the miyagi prefecture, the night a comet fell from the sky and suddenly everyone has weird powers and yahaba attracts birds and kyoutani is a walking animal documentary and this suddenly all hits, because yahaba cannot stop laughing.

“yoo-hoo~ oh my, why the dark faces, everyone?” oikawa asks as he walks into the room, iwaizumi right by his heels.

kunimi, who had been looking bored the entire time, picks up the piece of paper and loudly reads the two sentences written in thick black ink and an angry-looking scrawl across its surface. “yahaba, meet me at the lot behind the old humanities building, 6pm. don’t bring anyone, and don’t be late. that’s what it says.”

the room falls silent once more.

then, “holy shit, yahaba-chan, who did you cross this time?”

[in which yahaba receives a vaguely threatening letter, and kyoutani disappears from practice.]

kyoutani kentarou grew up with a firm belief that there are no such things as absolute truths. throughout his high school career, though, he has been confronted with a few exceptions and they have occurred to him as follows.

exception #1: yahaba shigeru absolutely does not love him. honestly, kentarou has a theory that yahaba is incapable of loving anyone or anything. that’s all it is, though, just a theory. it has no place on the list of absolute truths. not yet, anyway.

exception #2: despite not loving him, yahaba plays a really good game of pretend.

exception #3: kentarou is the most gullible bastard this world has ever known.

yahaba just really needs caffeine. and maybe kyoutani's number.

if he's going to be sick and in terrible pain, he might as well be sick and in terrible pain with a beautiful boy's soothing hands in his hair.

_kentarou lives in a time where dragons are loathed, feared, and generally looked at as a menace to human existence itself. too bad for him that he thinks they're the most fascinating things he will ever know.

and too bad for him he happens to be tied to one inexplicably. but, of course, he doesn't know that yet.

yahaba merely pushed his laptop towards kyoutani and tried to act noncholant about the whole thing. but he stared at kyoutani from the corner of his eyes because one thing that yahaba had learned about kyoutani in these past days was that kyoutani was good at this. he knew what a good poem was and what not.

kyoutani seemed frozen for a long moment, mouth and eyes wide open, hand frozen over the keyboard of the laptop. just as yahaba wanted to push kyoutani, he closed his mouth and turned towards yahaba, his whole face red.

"so?" yahaba inquired with raised eyebrows.

"it is good, i guess," kyoutani retorted and yahaba scoffed.

"i guess'? it's perfect."

(or in which yahaba has an internet friend who writes poems and befriending kyoutani is more natural that yahaba would've thought)

yahaba doesn’t know what it means when they’re laying in the dirt outside of their school after everybody else has already left practice and kyoutani says, “sometimes you make me feel like i can’t fucking breathe.”

it boils down to this; he has a crush on kyoutani kentarou, and instead of being granted the sweet release of death, he gets a constant stream of shirtless pictures instead.

yahaba shigeru, tattoo artist who keeps getting pressured into starting a relationship, meets kyoutani kentarou, a flower shop owner whose temper usually keeps people away. though both find each other unbearable, they can't deny the attraction they have to each other and hi-jinks ensure.

"i'm fine," kyoutani replies, making a poor attempt at sounding okay.

yahaba made it a priority to visit the fields after school everyday to tend to his patch of tulips. but when a newcomer arrives and he takes a liking to him, he panics and turns to watari for help.

or,

yahaba is lovestruck (and so is kyoutani) and watari is there to assist.

"no, no you are not."

when kyoutani comes back from the dead, yahaba is sitting on the headstone the next row over and reading a magazine.

kyoutani has to limp all the way to yahaba's house, but yahaba won't let that happen.

kyoutani doesn't know quite how yahaba got to be sitting in his passenger seat with his puppy, sora, sat in his lap licking his face but he wasn't complaining.

[ alternatively titled yahaba makes sure kyoutani doesn't die on the road ]

his mom promises dinner out to wherever he wants when she gets back but it's not really the same. he's always sort of wanted a real birthday night, as lame as it sounds, but she’s gone again and yahaba is running low on leftovers to reheat.

yahaba shigeru was a poor college student who lived in a dingy, practically furniture-free apartment, until one day someone broke in.

aka kyoutani breaks in to yahaba’s apartment planning on stealing stuff, but when he sees that he literally has nothing, he starts bringing stuff over every day until eventually its normal for kyoutani to be curled up on his couch watching tv, digging through his fridge, and wearing his pjs. somewhere along the way, they started dating without even realizing it.

"the nurse and the prince do not have a make out scene, sleep-chan!"

the match wasn’t really important in any sense of the word. it was against a smaller, less developed school that had sought them out, not the other way around. no one expected an equal fight, and seijou was supposed to come out of it easily, with barely a scratch to show it.

except that that’s not what happened.

"i accidentally sent one of my parents a text that was meant for you but i haven't told them that i'm dating you....or that i'm gay for that matter."

it had started as just a regular team sleepover at oikawa's house. however, upon the mention of 'party tricks,' things took an... odd turn.

or

yahaba is scary good at voice impressions, kyoutani is frustrated, and matsukawa & hanamaki are enjoying this way too much.

under the moon, with snowflakes sliding down my skin, and with your heart as awake as mine, i wonder, if it's better to stay or leave. i desire freedom, i want you, war won't stop me, but maybe my thoughts will.

“oh for— i mean we’ll be in public,” yahaba said. “representing our school. we could be on tv. our old upperclassmen might come to watch.”

“our team, not my face,” kyoutani had pointed out, feeling very reasonable.

“your face is a part of this team!” yahaba looked about five seconds away from stamping his heels ineffectually, or, like, putting his fist through the wall. you could never tell with that guy.

“three minutes or less,” the box had said. honestly, it was unsettling how it took roughly the same amount of time it took for instant ramen to be ready.

yahaba knows there's things you would rather forget and others you'd rather remember. but when the lines blur and the distinction falls away, some things (those scribbled out, painted in black, shoved into a dark corner never to be looked at the same again) become unforgettable.

kentarou gives a slight frown. "no one will find out. only you have the key, and it’s a monday, so there’s no reason for any of the coaches or members to be there, and it’s already late anyway, and there won’t be any cameras either since it’s a clubroom.”

or: what happens when kyoutani wants to get it on with yahaba in the clubroom.

kyoutani sees yahaba flirting with somebody else and even though they're not dating he is over come with jealousy. so, he takes matters into his own hands.

it's winter break, and kyoutani and yahaba hung out cuz why not? yahaba sprains his ankle after trying to ice skate, though. the rest that follows is a mix of sore feelings, butterflies, and fun chemistry.

yahaba and kyoutani are modern day witches. yahaba deals with plants and kyou with animals. one day, kuroo (that bastard), sells kyoutani a tiny freakin' dragon.

it was freezing and yahaba would be eternally pissed at watari for suggesting this 'second years weekend'.

yahaba didn't like ushijima. he especially didn't like that the man seemed to be in-love with him. the stalking was really getting old and he was tired of constantly having to avoid the man and hope this time wasn't the time he would finally snap and either kidnap him or kill him.

so, in a last ditch effort, he lies. says he's got a date. he hopes that would be enough, to let this dense fool see that he's really not interested, but, there he was. sitting at the bar. watching him.

he grabs the first guy that passes by, smiling and hoping this'll actually work.

_“hey,” shigeru says all of a sudden, still hovering in the doorway like he’s forgotten how to walk. “let’s get married.”

kentarou snorts. “sure. i’ll add it to the to-do list.”

“i mean it,” says shigeru, and oh fuck is he serious, kentarou was expecting him to say something like “you’ve never made a to-do list in your life, asshole,” and then ken would act offended and shigeru would hit him over the head with his newspaper like a dog (not that either of them would ever, ever do that to aki-chan) and they would make out for a while. instead, shigeru is just standing there, babbling on in a way that hints at barely-controlled panic. “i mean, we’re already basically married anyway, we live together and split up housework and argue about who has to cook and we even got a dog, that’s—fuck, ken, stop laughing, i’m fucking serious!”

or, kyoutani and yahaba get married and watari suffers._

  • in love | proposal!au, general, 1k+

yahaba smiled, and it’s one of those smiles that sent shivers down kyoutani's spine, because when yahaba smiled like that...he knew he had fucked up.

it was purely accidental that yahaba caught kyoutani coughing up flowers in front of the school.

"it doesn’t matter who it is but you’re going to die. do you hear me?! you’re going to die, you great big idiot! they're not worth dying for..."

kyoutani cries a lot because he kissed yahaba and he apologizes. or is it oikawa?

yahaba leaves the group chat and all hell breaks loose. kunimi just wants to sleep.

yahaba’s mouth twists as he considers his offer. “a date.” he decides.

shigeru notices the man's bandage before he sees anything else. a cover around the wrist isn't unusual, but this one's stained with blood.

but soulmates are meant to stay together even if they're unhappy.

"i'm going on a road trip over the summer break."

yahaba raises an eyebrow. "oh? who with?"

hesitating for a moment, kyoutani looks up at the sky. yahaba waits, unsure if he should let himself hope. at length, kyoutani shrugs and says, "my dog, probably."

kyoutani and yahaba mate.

“tell me the truth: how badly are you damaged?”

kyoutani’s eyes dart towards him for one flitting second, then, back to the floor. “medium.”

yahaba hisses and raises the puffball threateningly. “do you want me to use the best but most stinging ointment on you?"

yahaba goes to kyoutani's house for a school project. no project is done that day. only bantering. and some singing.

"yahaba scowls. “i’m not doing this.”

“for the record, i’m not either.” kyoutani bristles."

extremely short college au of these two pissed off cuties rooming together ft. an estranged watari who was convinced that yahaba was nothing if not extremely mild.

in which yahaba is a single parent and his daughter is a match maker.

kyoutani gets to take a trip with his father during golden week. it doesn't go how kyoutani plans it to.

kyoutani wakes, injured and alone, inside a witch's den. he's fucked.

  • date | general, 800+

kyoutani and yahaba go for their first date. or attempt to, anyway.

yahaba gets a twitter, and kyoutani definitely doesn't care.

  • cute | fluff, general, 600+

you’re an idiot, but i love you anyway, so i’ll let that slide for now.

kentarou didn't realize yahaba had dimples until that moment.

..those dimples caused a lot of internal strife.

kyoutani and yahaba share an apartment. and a bed.

yahaba turns out to be terrible to share a bed with.

just shigeru waking kyoutani with new methods.

  • bait | canon compliant, teen, 500+

“i said i’ll fucking score, so do your job and toss to your ace-”

“don’t-,” yahaba is interrupted by the coach loudly clearing his throat. it's probably for the best, because he doesn’t know what he’d do if the words ever actually left his lips.

don’t call yourself mine.

yahaba's working on his observational skills. so far, he's mostly just observing kyoutani. and his hands. mostly his hands. in his defense, they're really nice hands.

sometimes yahaba goes into a dancing mood and he just can't stop.

jul 5 2020 ∞
jul 29 2021 +
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