if you are the dreamer, i am what you dream.

what's new?

• ✓ apr. 1: happy wasteland day!!
• ✓ apr. 3: jesse james is assassinated by robert ford on this day in 1882 (happy title day to the first long poem i ever wrote ♡♡♡)
• ✓ apr. 5: niedziela palmowa in poland
• ✓ apr. 5: sul y blodau in wales
  • it is traditional to clean the graves of loved ones and decorate them with flowers on this day
• ✓ apr. 6: 1917 day... !!!
  • thomas blake i love u so dearly sweet boy ╥﹏╥
• ✓ apr. 7: pink moon!
• ✓ apr. 8: twin peaks birthday!!
• ✓ apr. 9: maundy thursday
• ✓ apr. 10: good friday
• ✓ apr. 11: holy saturday
• ✓ apr. 12: easter sunday!! ♡
• ✓ apr. 13: la pasquetta in italy
• ✓ apr. 14: mikey's birthday! :0)
• ✓ apr. 19: dale cooper's birthday ♡ special agent of my heart MWAH!
• ✓ apr. 20: my half birthday!!! ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜
• ✓ apr. 23: st. george's day (patron saint of england)
  • henry the fifth voice for the king and st. george !!!!
• ✓ apr. 25: al pacino's birthday !!! happy birthday al pal !!! ♡♡
  • the godfather waltz plays softly in the distance

goals

• ✓ keep planning garden!
• ✓ paint pisanki on holy saturday
• complete welsh history course
• ✓ make butter with kit from auntie
• ✓ reread the wasteland on april 1st
• ✓ listen to nick's album pink moon on april 7th

obsessions

• the pacific :0) !!!!
• homemade bread, fresh and warm, straight out of the oven... there is sincerely nothing like it in the world!
• dancing! everywhere, all the time! feels wonderful. reminds me of april of last year, this month must give me dancing fever
• just... the joy of writing! the number of times this month i've laughed out loud, buried my face in my hands, kicked my feet with delight, blushed with pleasure, rolled my eyes, whispered i love you and blew a kiss to my screen, groaned, moaned, and sighed... i wouldn't have it any other way. i love being a writer. and i love my characters so much, so, so, so much, my sweetest ones, little fragments of my heart walking around in the world, breathlessly
• the cluster of bleeding hearts i discovered in the shade of the birch tree... they don't look real! they look like a flower you'd find in the legend of zelda, little bright pink hearts floating in the breeze; you place one on your tongue and are restored to full health

moments

• am rlly losing my mind again watching the pacific. am rlly pausing the dvd every five seconds to admire my short kings. feels like october 2019 feels like the first time (the way i missed jay and hoosier... i'm sick!)
• driving to the grocery store every week with a roy orbison cd spinning, singing my way back to comfort, a return to normalcy, however small
• making dalgona coffee w a tutorial from my beloved local coffee shop (i miss it so much!)
• writing my first sonnet !!!! yes it's about thomas of lancaster no i am not taking questions at this time
• i've been keeping notes on my breadmaking journey for about a year now (my journey as an apprentice...!!!) and it's so wonderful to see how far i've come!! my loaves get better with every batch i make. thinking abt putting together a little book or pdf about the whole thing, with some of my own recipes and my process and some tips perhaps... just for funsies (*๓´╰╯`๓)
• mama coming up from working in the greenhouses with a bundle of strawberries in her hands.... they taste sweeter bc she grew them :0)
• when dean flamed thomas of lancaster with absolutely no visible remorse. the WAY i choked on my rice cake !

good things about the month

• using seed packets as bookmarks; lavender candles; tarantino movies; dandelions raising their cheerful lion's manes; doodling grape hyacinths and listening to pink moon; the delicate, fleshy blossoms on the crabapple tree; thunderstorms that come and go in the blink of an eye; windy evenings; easter candy; stopping by lowe's after every grocery store trip to admire the cherry trees, to touch their leaves, dreaming of buying my own; taking notes in my gardening book; mary oliver; the warmth in justin's eyes, his arms, his smile; the minutes following golden hour in which the light seems passed through the center of a grapefruit, or a warm, red stained-glass window; poems on poems on poems; rilke, as always; dancing around my bedroom in my underwear and a big t-shirt; noah czerny; dreaming big dreams, and then getting to work on them; ubiquitous iced coffees; studying new york times articles; sitting outside everyday and reading, rain or shine; my novella !!! i haven't had so much fun with prose in ages; snake boy's mixtape on endless loop; consuming so much poetry that i awaken from my dreams reciting alexandrines; wilfred owen's letters; the dogwood finally blooming! beautiful little red flowers balanced atop their branches; strawberry pancakes;